hopelessdater16 Posted July 13, 2013 Posted July 13, 2013 So naturally, I really like this guy that I met at university. We have known each other for a year and have been friends the whole time, but I have also liked him the whole time. When we met I was somewhat flirty and got his number and we would hang out pretty regularly for a time but then didn't speak for a while. Recently he texted me to go have dinner with him and would not take no for an answer. Since then we have hung out all the time. He is really shy and awkward. He never texts me unless I text him, but if I do text him, he always wants to hangout upon my suggestion. We do all of this stuff that sounds vaguely date like, like going to dinner or lunch together and even going to a dance once, but then its also oh so very friendly. Some people say I should tell him how I feel because he never will, but I fear loosing the friendship if he doesn't reciprocate. To me all of this is obvious signs of "he's just not that into you", but I can't seem to jerk him loose in my mind or give up hope. What do you guys think?
twinkie0 Posted July 13, 2013 Posted July 13, 2013 First of all, the title of the thread is really wierd and misleading. Maybe it's some sort of expression I'm not familiar with. Oh, well... You gotta look out for something that tells you he's into you, he's bound to give a little hint away eventually. If he really is shy and awkward, you shouldn't be surprised he doesnt text you. If he was an open, outgoing guy and didn't text you, that would be a red flag right there, but I guess it's okay if he's like that with everyone. After that, it's just a matter of taking the risk of telling him how you feel.
coachcomeback Posted July 13, 2013 Posted July 13, 2013 Your friend had great advice. Just tell him. Then you dont have to worry or guess anymore. If you say he is super shy.. he may just need you to take the lead. If that is the case.. then you can likely lead the relationship in the exact direction you want. Go for it girlie! =-)
Author hopelessdater16 Posted July 14, 2013 Author Posted July 14, 2013 Thanks for the advice. I pretty much agree with you guys that that's what I need to do. Its just one of those high risk high reward things. So we met up for lunch a few days ago and it occurred to me that I had never asked him about pets and that is something that's really important to me in life. I love dogs and I want to date a person that likes dogs too. He told me that he has two cats and I somewhat disappointedly told him that I was more of a dog person. He told me that he was more of a dog person as well, but just didn't happen to have a dog. THEN he said that when he has his own family he wants to have one of each. I have NEVER talked to him about anything like that before. I thought it was really sweet that he said that because it shows that he's thinking about the future and that he likes dogs and that he wants a family. BUT to me, it kind of sounded like "Don't write me off because I'm a cat person. If we get married we can compromise and have one of each!" What do you guys think? Am I over thinking this WAY too much?
todreaminblue Posted July 14, 2013 Posted July 14, 2013 Thanks for the advice. I pretty much agree with you guys that that's what I need to do. Its just one of those high risk high reward things. So we met up for lunch a few days ago and it occurred to me that I had never asked him about pets and that is something that's really important to me in life. I love dogs and I want to date a person that likes dogs too. He told me that he has two cats and I somewhat disappointedly told him that I was more of a dog person. He told me that he was more of a dog person as well, but just didn't happen to have a dog. THEN he said that when he has his own family he wants to have one of each. I have NEVER talked to him about anything like that before. I thought it was really sweet that he said that because it shows that he's thinking about the future and that he likes dogs and that he wants a family. BUT to me, it kind of sounded like "Don't write me off because I'm a cat person. If we get married we can compromise and have one of each!" What do you guys think? Am I over thinking this WAY too much? smilin........a little too much thinking.....your last sentence made me smile.....you have your family including marriage pets and him all mapped out by one sentence that he said....just reign it back a bit........even if the guy you like is super shy and awkward if he truly wants you in his life or wants to date you, he will let you know, thats a definite(my grandpa told me so lol, if a guy really likes you , you wont need to ask), just make him comfortable around you , obviously you already are, and keep doing what you are doing...but relax doing it....dont plan the wedding......just yet...smilin atcha..good luck and wishing you happy dating..deb
Author hopelessdater16 Posted July 18, 2013 Author Posted July 18, 2013 Lol, here I am to complain yet again, but here it goes. So THE GUY texted me recently and asked me if I wanted to go get frozen yogurt with him. This would be a great idea but I'm lactose intolerant. I told him as much and he was like well, I'm not sure what to do then. I said me neither, we should just keep thinking about it and surely we'll come up with something by Saturday. I may give myself away here in this next part, but my particular university has a tradition called "tortilla tossing". It is something friends or couples or anyone can do where the people take a bag of tortillas to this bridge and try to get a tortilla to land on this one section of it. Depending on who you ask, landing the tortilla will bring you good luck, means you're meant to be with the person you went with, or means you're meant to be with the your crush. Its stupid I know, but a tradition nonetheless. So having a full bag of tortillas in my fridge intended for other purposes, I asked him if he wanted to go tortilla tossing with me. He awkwardly responded, "Oh I was thinking we could just meet somewhere for lunch, haha." I don't know how to explain why, but I know from this that he doesn't like me.
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