Tina747 Posted July 13, 2013 Posted July 13, 2013 (edited) So this is a question I have about how you feel when your date is flirty, or overly complimentary, to the opposite sex when you are together on the first few dates... I'm remaining neutral here... curious what you would feel... One example would be him telling the waitress she is beautiful in front of you while you are together on a first date, then compliments the hostesses lovely dress, and then the cashier's pretty hair all in the same night. Please don't get me wrong, I don't feel jealous as I have not known this man long enough to invested the feelings. Just wondering if it is a red flag ... for example, I would ask myself "Self, if I am on a first date with a guy I like, and our waiter was handsome, would I say to the waiter," Oh, you have such a handsome smile and you look so cute in that attire"... etc. No! for the reason I would think that would make my date feel uncomfortable or awkward, and would probably make the waiter feel awkward too... cause I was clearly on a date... but is that just me?... I wouldn't say it, even if I thought the waiter was cute, because I would assume I was being a bit disrespectful to my date. Do you think my assumptions are wrong? He has done this about five times. If you do think it is weird, why do you think he does it? This guy is not at all new to dating, is divorced, and strikes me as kind of smooth and suave... Also, just want to be clear.... I didn't get the feeling he was "really" interested in them (I don't think).... it was like he was just trying to be smooth.... Edited July 13, 2013 by Tina747
BluEyeL Posted July 13, 2013 Posted July 13, 2013 I would definitely not go on a second date with him if he as much as looks at another woman on the first date. Later on, it's OK, I know he's not blind, but flirting in front of you at any time is disrespectful.
hppr Posted July 13, 2013 Posted July 13, 2013 A buddy of mine did stuff like that in front of his (now ex) wife. He didn't cheat on her or anything but has some weird insecurity issues or something going on. I can't put my finger on it but the best way I can put is that it's like being around a girl who always needs to be the center of attention and who flirts with all the guys...only he's a big fat hairball guy...
Ninjainpajamas Posted July 13, 2013 Posted July 13, 2013 I'll make this simple for you and quite harsh...any girl that that puts up with that is an idiot, if you can't bang the two marbles in your head to know that this isn't disrespectful to you...on a DATE, then you kind of deserve what's coming to you, because obviously this is a lesson you need to learn the hard way...this guy is blatantly showing you he doesn't respect your presence or have any boundaries, the mere fact that you're still sitting there lets him know he's going to be able to push the boundaries even farther in which he definitely will. Once a guy knows you're a pushover, watch out. This guy is not smooth or suave, please tell me you have higher standards and more common sense than that.
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