colgirl Posted July 12, 2013 Posted July 12, 2013 A few years ago I was 3 months pregnant when it was discovered I had cancer. In order for the treatment to begin I had to have an abortion. The treatment would have killed the baby anyway. Obviously this was an extremely traumatic time in my life. Well my husband has for the past year or so become more and more depressed because he wants to have a child and I am now not able to have any more children. (I have a 16 year old son from a previous relationship). Everything came to a head a week ago and he has now left and gone to live with his parents. I went to see them a few days ago whilst he was at work. I poured out all my feelings to them and they could see how heartbroken I am. I feel that I have lost my best friend - my days have lost their usual routine, all his cupboards are bare, I have no one to sit on the sofa with in the evening and enjoy all the films we used to watch - I feel I have lost everything. I'm heartbroken, desperately sad and don't know how to deal with these feelings. I feel a failure and embarrassed that I can't get pregnant so he has to find someone else who can fulfil that. I get the impression he is fine though - I know he is seeing someone from his office. But what will happen if she can't get pregnant? discard her too, i guess. I've even just deleted my FB profile as I'm sick of seeing photos of happy couples - it all feels like a kick in the teeth. Just need to let off steam and hopefully listen to other people's own experiences of being deserted. thanks
Balzac Posted July 12, 2013 Posted July 12, 2013 Welcome to LS. Congrats on surviving cancer! It's confusing to read your story because "getting pregnant" is rather vague terminology in your circumstance. He's already moved on and I'm guessing there are other relationship issues but let me ask. "A few years ago" and "I have a 16year old" seem to indicate that you are mid thirtyish? When you say "cannot get pregnant" are you talking about hysterectomy thus no uterus or your eggs are damaged? One would think that your husband's sperm and "other's" egg could produce a pregnancy, were alternatives discussed? 1
MidwestUSA Posted July 12, 2013 Posted July 12, 2013 This is the excuse he's given you for leaving, when in actuality, the other woman was in the picture first. Find the evidence you need to support that, I'm sure it's out there. And if he's deep into an affair, it won't matter one bit to him whether she can have a baby "for him". Of course he's fine! What do you mean "his" cupboards are bare? The home you're in? Wouldn't that be "your" cupboards, or "our" cupboards? I just found this odd, perhaps a misspeak? Or are you completely dependent on him to fill those cupboards, as in, he has left you with nothing? 1
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