Is 7 Months still too Soon...NC.. and hes pyschologically driving me Nuts!

[SadBabyGirl]

Hi everyone its been awhile I didnt write about my situation. My ex meant the world to me and he still is my world, which makes me sad. He abandoned me last April, changed cell phone number before I even had a chance to call him and try to reconcile or negotiate something. We broke no contact in May and June he was emailing me, checking on me, as i mentioned before a few months ago he even paid my college tuition. I had high hopes that maybe he still loved me...However

 

Since July I have not heard from him. I emailed him beautiful pictures of me, new songs that I KNOW me and him would have both listened together; even I mail little things from my life like essays from school and things so that he can see how well am doing. Has he replied...No. Not since July. I try to call his family as well coz I was worried about him and nobody answers the phone. One day someone picked up his dads cell and didnt say nothing just sat and listened and hung up on me which was REALLY bizarre coz his dad always answered the phone to me. The problem is ...

 

He was my first real true love despite the fact he lied to me, hid from me in order to break up and sugar coated me goodbye , me off. I cant stop thinking of him, not a day goes by when i dont see or hear something which reminds me of him, i feel like im going crazy. I have tried to move on, i put my pictures up on singles websites, and keep meeting people am not compatible with. Its frusterating me because i Keep comparing these people with my ex, its almost like im dilluted over him, I cant face reality that he hurt me and is not coming home. Has this ever happened to anyone before ?? They say if i met someone else and moved on I would forget him but so far it hasnt happened, I cant meet anybody where i live becoz its a small town... and anyways my ex is living so far from me it would make it complicated for me to even approach him now to try to work anything out and my friends say i will just get hurt if i go to try to find him.

 

Its especially hard *ladies* u know like when its that time of the month and i feel emotional...then all of the feelings, memorys of him and our good times come back to me. Even in Dreams, I keep having dreams that he dies in a car crash and it freaks me out. A friend of mine also had told me on chat that he saw my ex holding some girls hand walking out of our old house, but I dont know if its true or not coz this guy only saw my ex's picture and he asked for my ex's address the day before but i didnt give it to him) When he told me this i freaked out so bad my legs were buckling and shaking as if i was having a ceisure in panic and sadness,but maybe so i think my friend lied to me just to make me hate my ex and go for him.. plus he said the girl was very religious and from waht i knew of my ex he didnt go for real conservative type or religious groups or people. AND IF HE loved me sooo much as he claimed how could he move on so suddenly after me?

 

Am i just hurting myself over all this..should i just give up. Why do i still feel connected to him and have the false hopes that he will come home to me someday? I know its been 7 months, maybe thats a long time but I feel like its been 2 weeks. I emailed all of my sadness to his sister and she still keeps in touch with me at least. She wont be his alibi for me or tell me whats going on in his life but she said she will listen to me and i can email her when i need someone to talk to...

Can anybody give me some advice or help me here?

Thanks...

[head/heels]

dont email his sister no matter how close you think you two are...i guarantee she tells him and she definitely does if he asks her....

 

Stop all contact from her and only speak to him if he initiates it and tell him he lost you and why are you calling me...

 

Besides, will you really want him back with how he treated you...dont you think you do deserve better>?

 

I know you think that when it isnt that time of the month, right?

 

SO wait it out and you will make it through... you only live once so dont wait around for him.... not another minute!

[Weird]

I am pretty much with head/heels.

 

Don't contact his sister, try to live your life like how you did ebfore you met this guy and then if he actually grows up and quits being a dick (sorry but from the stuff you posted he sounds like he is acting like a prick) then he will contact you and you can decide what you want to do.

[Mundy]

Be strong and dont contact him, i know where you are coming from. It will just drag on and on. Make the decision to leave him alone. He knows he can have you anytime he wants and that is not a good position to be in. I was like you for a while but i just stopped trying to contact my ex. It has been 6 weeks now and when i bump into her now it makes me feel better. Whenever you want to contact him ring and friend and remember why you can't contact him. I know it is tough but you have to move on from this for you and for him

[SadBabyGirl]

I dont know why I still feel love for this man. I keep having dreams of him that hes making love to me and that we are happy again just to wake up to reality. Hes been pretty cruel about the whole break up thing too I mean after he dissapeared from me, he didnt keep in touch for like a month UNTIL i found out where he was still at after being fed a line of Bull from his family. Then he emailed me for a few months, basically giving lame exuses and reasons why he had to leave me in the past, and for me to focus on my future. I was being nice because I felt after all we had been through and had together as a close couple, that maybe we should just still be friends. Thats why I sent him songs, a birthday card, and let him in the know about how good i was doing in school. Thats how we always were, even when we were friends before we started goin out. Well after July he stopped replyin my emails and he never comes online anymore (yahoo, msn, aim) unless its invisible or im blocked. I mean I just totally dont get it, he's treating me as if he hates me and i told him that in an email when we broke up and hes like I dont hate you otherwise id be harsher when we broke up, and then he went and gave me a copy of his credit card so i could pay for my college semester and buy whatever i "needed" (that, i believe is the part where he sugared me off). I used it a few times on a few things coz I didnt wanna go syko with it and swoop down to his level being an a**h*** but I felt angry, I felt that time I wanted him not his stupid money.

 

I just totally didnt get it why he sent me packin like this, i sacrifised everything I had in my homestate and flew to his state cross country to live with him (he always paid my airfare) and moved in and he took reallly good care of me. Then one fine day, he sends me to california and his dad promised me that his son , or him and his son even would come meet me here and meet my family and bring me back home. He never shows up and then a few weeks later calls me up lying about a few things (was about to get deported overseas for illegally working here, and that he didnt get the car loan for the car we were gonna buy all this stuff) and i found out a month later he didnt leave the country he was still here and driving the new car. I mean to me, this did not sound like the man I love, or had lived with all those years. I wish he would just mentally leave me alone because I always remember the happy times until i get to the end when he did those things to me and IM like shocked coz I kept telling myself well maybe its not him, maybe the Family is behind it coz I met a lotta familys from some countries who do this, they pick a wife for their son. But they could have all just been honest with me and told me the truth. His dad kept telling me on the phone that his son was overseas, and doing very very bad in life, lost his job etc. and kept telling me that they loved me. Then he got weird when I found out his son was still in their state and working same place AND driving the new car. My ex even sent me an email telling me he moved out from his dads house coz he had to get away from "me and his dad who were driving him crazy" but I dont buy it. I think hes still at his dads and just told me that coz he was probably scared Id fly over there and show up on his doorstep.

 

I just wish I could forget him completely (eternal sunshine of the spotless mind?) Normally I try to keep busy as much as possible with school and go to my church groups, but as I mentioned earlier when its that time of the month I start to fall back on his memorys and have dreams. I tried to date, I mean im a very Good looking girl (a lotta guys shame him for leaving me ) but I cant meet people here locally as Im in a very very small town now, Its hard. Thats why I emailed his sister coz I missed him so much and shes the only one that would reply my emails and keep in touch with me, i poured everything out to her but as I said she wont be his alibi in this and let me in the know on things. I hope I can get over this soon...