Ever wonder if the dumpng was just their way of asking you to try harder?

[Push_Through_It]

Was watching a movie tonight and there was a comment along the lines of if a girl gives you a breakup line like "I just need to focus on my career" or "I just need to be single/alone for awhile"...that majority of the time it means "Get the h*ll away from me" but that there is also a chance it could also mean "try harder dummy".

 

Just curious if people (guys or girls) believe this or not because up until now Ive always just taken it as a sign to get lost and now Im wondering if perhaps I gave up a little early on some of my past relationships.

 

No big story or regret here, just want to better prepare myself in case I face this again down the road.

[jesha]

I think it always depends on the situation. Girls especially will do this just to see how much their partner cares about them - and I've seen it backfire. I think the best thing to do is if you get dumped by someone you really care about and want to be with , you should question their decision and try to work the issue out - and if they genuinely want to break up with you and want you out of their life.... well hey at least you tried and just move on

[LostOne1]

I actually thought this is what my ex wanted... I think she wanted to leave me to see if I cared about her. But I think in some form it backfired on her and in some form I think she also wasn't scared of losing me. I think she DID have a backup guy on the side...

 

At the end of the day though.. I can live with myself, because I wasn't the one that let go. It's something she has to live with.

[USMCHokie]

...that there is also a chance it could also mean "try harder dummy".

 

Never. It is a clear, unambiguous sign that tells me to reduce my efforts with her to ZERO.

[ConfusedHumanBeing]

The movie is Hitch and if that isnt the most unrealistic movie Ive ever seen.....

 

Look, if a woman breaks it off (especially with a longer relationship), then its done. She thought about it (probably not telling you a thing) for quite a long time and held in those feelings. A large amount of guys would NEVER know. Stories after stories on here about guys saying "She left me all of the sudden" or whatever. Sure, there can be signs, but the whole notion of try harder is dumb. IF you do that, then she will say its a. too late or b. You look too needy or C. She doesnt want you to try because she has side guy there and wants you to just go away.

 

There is probably D, E, F, G that I could go into, but if the girl was mature enough, she would come to you say "This is what is going on, and Im unhappy with _________"

[Push_Through_It]

Never. It is a clear, unambiguous sign that tells me to reduce my efforts with her to ZERO.

 

 

See that's always been my thinking as well. Just wanted some different perspectives to see if girls really do play that little game.

 

It seems like some of them do...

[USMCHokie]

See that's always been my thinking as well. Just wanted some different perspectives to see if girls really do play that little game.

 

It seems like some of them do...

 

Who cares? Even if they did do it, that's all it is, a game. You would just be a desperate, supplicant p*ssy for played by that game. And it just opens the door for her to do it any time she's unhappy or wants you to do something.

 

You'd be nothing but a dog doing tricks for her.

[Vials]

No. There are other ways to communicate your unhappiness in a relationship than breaking up, if you're still interested in being with the person. A breakup is so...final.