Dylan Posted October 22, 2004 Posted October 22, 2004 OK, this might be kind of confusing (God knows I'm confused), so bear with me. I'm a freshman in college, and there is this girl that I've liked for about a year now, and she's a senior at my old high school. During my senior year, I was friends with all of the seniors on the softball team, so since I went to just about every home game, I got to know nearly everyone on the team early in the school year. I'm not saying I was friends with them all (meaning we didn't all hang out or anything) but I got to know them all and they knew me. Well, I really started to like this one girl in particular. She's smart, funny, beautiful, kinda quiet, and shy. I always noticed she was particularly quiet around me, and she really didn't respond well when I would talk to her, so I just got the impression that she didn't like me at all. So, I kinda gave up on her for about a month, but then one night, my dad saw her mom out somewhere, and it turns out that they went to high school together, but they hadn't seen each other since they graduated. They talked to each other for a few minutes, and then, of course, they each asked if they had kids and stuff, and when my dad mentioned my name, she said "Oh really? That's your son? My daughter Ashley really likes him....she thinks so highly of him." So when my dad told me that, I decided to take action. But, apparently I was too late, because like a week before I asked her out, she started dating another guy, and I was unaware at the time. Well, for the year that she was dating this guy, she basically cut all communication with me. She really just acted like she didn't know me. Anyway, she broke up with him about a month ago, and I've briefly talked to her a couple of times since then, but here's my problem: I've noticed that with other people, even guys, she's still kind of shy, but she'll talk and do things like playfully shove someone or give them a hug or something. But when she's around me (and she's only like this with me), she's VERY quiet, and she won't go out of her way to talk to me. Even when I initiate conversations, they usually don't last long at all. And come to think of it, I don't think she's ever even touched me before. Actually, her actions when around me are borderline rude. A good example....about a week ago, I saw her after one of her games, (and granted, she was probably very tired) and I smiled and said "Hey Ashley, what's up", just as a conversation starter, and she briefly looked at me, barely even smiled, and looked away without saying anything....and that's not the first time something like that has happened. Like I said, this girl is beautiful, and all the guys at her school like her, so she could basically have any guy she wanted, which is why I'm leaning toward the side that she's probably just not interested. But I guess I'm just basically asking these couple of questions: Why is she acting like this toward me? What can I say to her to let her open up more toward me? Should I just come straight out and ask her out? Anybody have any similar experiences? Any and all responses are appreciated. Thanks for taking the time.
Merin Posted October 22, 2004 Posted October 22, 2004 Dylan, Well at first I was going to say that maybe she is just shy around you because she likes you and she feels nervous.. but then getting towards the end.. her behaviour IMHO just really does sound rude. If you don't know of anything you may of done to offend her, then I guess I would wonder if she has heard a rumor regarding you and has taken it to be true... Either way.. IF you know you haven't done anything or said anything that she may be upset about, then yes I would approach her and ask her if you've done anything that has offended her. Good Luck
GuyMontag Posted October 22, 2004 Posted October 22, 2004 I will deliver the ugly truth: there is only one way to find out, ask her out. You hear it all the time because it is true. I had many confidence issues in highschool, but eventually I realized that it is much more comforting to find out rather than simply ponder. Rejection stings for a bit, but complacency lasts a lifetime. Damn thats a good line, someone should put it in a quote book! Good luck.
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