alex007 Posted July 10, 2013 Posted July 10, 2013 Ok so I met a girl (she is 20 and I am 27) and we started getting to know each other and she seemed like she wanted to be my GF the way she would hint about some things so after a week or two I asked her to be my GF she said yes. We have been hanging out almost every single day, after we have work. After the first week of mainly us hanging out she wanted to include her friends in almost everything we were doing, and I didn't want her to miss out on friend time so I would say yes. Well It got to the point were It seemed she cared more about her friends then she did me so I told her I wanted to break up and that this was not working out. She freaked out and said she was going to come over to my house to fix things right then and I did not want her to and went to her house instead, I told her she is not very loving and is kinda distant and I feel like we are more like friends because she is not affectionate much(she said because she does not want to let her guard down because she always gets hurt and does not want to get hurt). We made up after she said she would change. Well here we are a week later and she is telling me we have been hanging out every day and she does not need to see me every day that she wants her space, and that distance makes the heart grow fonder that she needs time to miss me because she takes me for granted. So on the day she said that... I called her last night at 9:30pm and texted her "goodnight..." and she never responded tell she was on her lunch today 11 hours later and she always tells me goodnight and texts me before work every day saying things like "good morning my handsome boyfriend." So this is all really fishy and I have a weird guy feeling. Should I just end It with her? Or just give her space and see what happens? Because I don't feel appreciated much or cared for right now... and told her I need to talk to her in person tonight If she is not busy. Also her family loves me, they really like me a lot.
TaraMaiden Posted July 10, 2013 Posted July 10, 2013 In a nutshell: She's too young and you are way too clingy. WAY too clingy. She's at a different social stage to you. She WANTS to hang out with her friends, do her stuff, have fun and loosen up. You on the other hand, sound almost as if you're wanting her to play housey-housey. She's not ready, and rightly so. This is an incompatibility that time alone may change - but I doubt it. What her family's opinion of you is, is frankly, irrelevant. What counts most is what she feels about you. And right now, she feels suffocated.... You need to bolster your own self-esteem and confidence and accept that couples are not joined at the hip, actually shouldn't be, and function better when there's a degree of independence. She - needs to live her own life, because you're stifling her, and pinning her down. At her age, that's the last thing she needs. 2
worldexploded Posted July 11, 2013 Posted July 11, 2013 Sounds like her and my ex would have been perfect for each other. He thought I was too dependent although he didn't have much of a social life...just his mom and teenage sister. TaraMaiden has got it spot on. Give her space. She probably would like you to be more casual about it. It's only been a month. If you really see a future with this girl live your own life. Texting is fine but you can't ask her to be with you everyday. Good luck to you. : )
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