peekaboox Posted July 10, 2013 Posted July 10, 2013 Hi there, I have been in a 3.5years relationship with this guy. Our relationship had soo many ups and downs; its like we've been through hell. But towards the end, we both grew up; evolved more but still stick to each other. Dramatic ending of my story; I had to go back to my home country as I was done with my degree.. and my guy wasnt into long distance relationships. plus there were his family issues and religion (not that i give a damn, but he comes from a stereotypical muslim background although he is a hypocrite and does not really follow his religion). Back home, we no more talk. I have whatsapped him once; he replied. He was very polite and sweet and even said that he miss me. But that does not make things okay. I recently realised that it has been a year since things were over between us. On top of that, Im unemployed as the work crisis in my country is bad. My days and nights seem longer, more lonely and more sad. Ive lost some friends (more like we've drifted away). So, most of the time, Im home. There were days were I would read and paint. But I no more do that. I've lost the motivation to do things; I've lost the will power to move forward and keep going. I still miss him. Its like I'm lost between fits of pain and rage. I sleep a lot, dont eat on time or hardly eat. I dont exercise, dont read, dont do things that I want to do. I listen to songs and get emo. Those regular mood swings are draining me. Im trapped in this material world and feel worthless. I dont have love; I dont have a career. I dont have happiness. I feel like crying. I feel like dying. Never knew I was going to end up like this. No goal, no ambition; just living with memories of the past, feeling pain on a daily basis and watching time slip by. also, if it makes a difference; my ex is the first and only guy I slept with. We were both virgins. I thought it would strengthen our relationship but it did not. I have liked a few guys.. But could never go on dates or dare to kiss again. so yeah, nothing so far. I dont have it in me anymore. the love, the passion to live life. im really lost. any advices would be very much appreciated.
Toddbt12y1 Posted July 10, 2013 Posted July 10, 2013 What is your country of origin? Would it be possible for you to try for a work visa? Maybe full citizenship? I truly am not familiar with how that works. All I can tell you is to not give up. I imagine your life is very hard...as you say. But...value your life. Do not give up and die. Have you tried options to return near your ex? Have you tried options to get out of your country...? I am certain another poster can help you there. Key is to one day move on. Even though you lost your ex. Realize that even if you both never get back together...you can still find peace and happiness with another man. It is hard, but possible. You are very important. I surely do not want you to give up. You haven't given up...not yet. You are making an effort now. Trying to find answers from the people of LS. Keep fighting. I am sure many great posters can help you...in someway.
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