conzboneeus Posted July 8, 2013 Posted July 8, 2013 Dated a girl 4 months. That's all. Got hot and heavy wasn't sure at first thought she was a flake tbh. Somewhere, somehow I fell in love and "lost my hands" I'm 56 no kid and no rookie at relationships. I suck at them but that's different. Bad argument told me to leave never wanted to see me again. She had been acting weird for weeks so I should have known but macho ego blinded me. Went 2 1/2 months NC, felt okay (still thought about her) but wanted to live my life again. Went back on Facebook (I deactivated) and redid my page. I took the last 9 weeks to get in super shape. Trained hard, eating clean, really got ripped. All of my friends came on and said holy cow you look great! I do too. And then up pops a old convo with the ex. So I sends her a message. Hope your well, I said some **** but didn't deserve that treatment, but its okay, have a good life, out. Now this girl probably wrote me off before the hinges on the door stopped creaking when she slammed it as I left. Of course no answer but really nothing to answer anyway. Just pissed I gave in an contacted her at all. Not at square one in fact any little fantasy I had about maybe she was just waiting for me to contact her is gone. But I knew it in my heart even before that so I was just being weak. I am so friggin tired of this. I am a grown man, bodybuilder, nice guy (really) women like me everyone likes me! I need tools to stop thinking about this woman and move on. Real stuff to do like a mantra or a book or a electric shock collar to zap myself when i think of her. Seriously anyone have a trick that works? Thanks!
starlet86 Posted July 8, 2013 Posted July 8, 2013 Could try a snap band? Haha. I have seriously considered that but genuinely I would be snapping myself constantly. What does help me though is loud music. I put in my earphones and stick on some of my favourite songs (nothing that reminds me of him) and I drown out all my thoughts. I love reading but it doesn't stop my mind wandering enough at the moment. Also driving helps, once again with loud music. Some people say being around friends, but I end up talking about him and driving everyone insane. I feel your pain, but you seem to be doing really well, keep up the hard work.
Author conzboneeus Posted July 8, 2013 Author Posted July 8, 2013 Thanks Starlet. I know time will heal. Laying it out in writing and looking at myself and knowing what I am doing does help. I am not is the river in Egypt at least. I'll be okay just had to get this last little glimmer out of my head. At least I didn't curl up in a ball and moan and so far I have done some positive stuff for myself. Now just need to move on. Ai, I would never, ever have thunk this would happen to me. Go figya.
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