adb22 Posted July 7, 2013 Posted July 7, 2013 (edited) I said I wouldn't post in this forum again for quite a few reasons, but I need a little help talking myself down from making another mistake. Last week, my ex contacted me and talked about how much he wanted to hang out soon. I was hesitant, but I accepted. For the next couple of days after the initial contact, we continued to chat. Yesterday, I was trying to finalize the plans and then he said, "this whole thing is awkwarding me out, sorry." He continued, "there are some awkward strings because we used to date" (He knows that although I don't want to be with him, I still feel a bit of an emotional connection with him). Him backing out would have been fine to me, if he hadn't pulled the same thing at least two other times, previously (Obviously I was stupid enough to fall for it again) Anyway, the 3rd time was the charm, and this set me off. I pretty much gave him a piece of my mind. I texted something along these lines: "You know what? I've been biting my tongue for way too long, but fyi in your future endeavors, this is not okay, This is going to be a long a** rant, but I'm sure you'll get over it. This thing is only awkward because you made it so. You're incredibly indecisive. You can't decide if you want to f**k me, be my friend, or whatever! I liked you, not that it fricken matters to you, but now I see how stupid I am. I really don't know what game you were trying to play, but teasing people is not cool! I really do hope that the next girls can deal with all of that, but I don't want to be someone's toy to play with when they're feeling down, only to be chucked away when you get the ego stroke you wanted. Don't worry, I won't contact you anymore and I'll lose your number for your sake." Problem is, I feel like my delivery and some content was a little immature and I kind of want to apologize for the delivery, but stress that the feeling is still the same: he pissed me off! But at the same time, I know it's partially because I don't want to break contact completely. I'm messed up at the moment. What do I do? Edited July 7, 2013 by adb22
Darren Steez Posted July 7, 2013 Posted July 7, 2013 (edited) It's absolutely immature but you needed to say it, right? Who cares? You called him out on his game playing, now he knows how you feel. Sometimes people are afraid to just let the truth out and in your words bite their tongue. Sure we regret it after the fact but sometimes righteous anger is the little push we need to get our little rants out. Good on you p.s lose his number and go NC. It's not good for you, he has no intention of being with you and is only with you for the sex (I assume), you say you still have an emotional connection...absolutely and he's playing on it to get you into bed. Do yourself a favor and let him go. Edited July 7, 2013 by Darren Steez 1
inaya42 Posted July 8, 2013 Posted July 8, 2013 meh -- don't apologize. all you did was to use words to describe his behaviors. he's the one who behaves terribly and messes you around. also, an apology will just reinforce his behavior because you've broken NC. don't do it. really there's no need.
Tenderheartbear Posted July 9, 2013 Posted July 9, 2013 Do not apologize for your feelings. He is the one stringing you along and all you did was tell him about himself. He should be the one apologizing to YOU. 1
Author adb22 Posted July 12, 2013 Author Posted July 12, 2013 Against the great advice that was given, a day after posting this thread, I stupidly contacted and apologized for my delivery, because I know it was a bit immature; however, I let him know that the meaning was still very much relevant and that his actions felt like several slaps in the face. I know what I was expecting. I was expecting him to understand where I was coming from, but no such luck, of course. Instead of admitting their faults, cowards always just avoid them, so that was that. He won't be getting anymore contact for me. This whole thing was toxic. I don't need that or him in my life!
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