goneaway Posted July 7, 2013 Posted July 7, 2013 (edited) Been broken up for 5 months. We've not seen each other for that long. He broke up with me... after a year of us being together. Although I think he and I had some issues, I don't really feel like I got the full story on why he broke up with me. I feel like there was more there than he told me, but aside from asking him to talk to me about it and giving him a chance to voice himself, I didn't press any further. I handled the breakup as well as I could. It hurt me a lot because I loved him more than anything (I still do but I'm not telling him that) and I know he knew that. For a short while after the breakup, he was still polite to me. He told me he missed seeing me. I said I still missed and loved him. Then one day, he just snapped without warning and got very angry with me and we stopped talking. Some time passed, he apologized. I felt kind of uneasy with him so I kept my distance and accepted the apology but nothing more. The same thing happened again where he snapped. I cut contact. It's now 5 months later, and he has found a way to contact me and is choosing to insult me in a very roundabout manner. Why is he going out of his way to be rude to me when he's the one who left me? I seriously was nothing but sweet to him during our relationship and although I backed away after the relationship, I remained very civil and caring towards him, just not overbearing. What gives? I know people act like this sometimes as a way of pushing people away but I haven't reached out to him. I know he knows I still love him, but I'm not putting my life on hold because of that. Edited July 7, 2013 by goneaway
Nicoleiia Posted July 7, 2013 Posted July 7, 2013 One thing I have learned about NC and life is that people don't like being ignored. He is probably very confused about his feelings and doesn't like the fact that you cut all contact. Based on what you said about his behavior you did the right thing. You should continue NC and move on with your life. He dumped YOU so therefore you have nothing to do with him.
Author goneaway Posted July 7, 2013 Author Posted July 7, 2013 It's strange because he cut contact with me before I cut contact with him. It's really weird, inexplicable behavior for him. Moving on and letting go would be great, but I have this fear that without understanding why this happened as it did, that I'll walk into a new relationship later on still hung up over the details of this one. I guess because I was in a relationship many, many years ago that ended under similar circumstances. The guy left me without much reason and cut all contact with me, leaving me to wonder for years why things happened that way--we got back in touch recently and he apologized for it but... it haunted me. I guess when you love someone, you like to believe that they are good people and that their actions, especially orchestrated over long periods of time, have some sort of rational meaning behind them...
Talulah Posted July 7, 2013 Posted July 7, 2013 My ex did this for the last coue of weeks after the break-up. Making rude comments, putting me down. It's his way of lashing out. Man are not good with dealing with ending of things. So, he needs to get his anger out somehow. Sorry. Don't talk to him anymore.
Author goneaway Posted July 8, 2013 Author Posted July 8, 2013 Thanks. I cut off everything with him today. It was tough because it felt so final... I went to unsubscribe from his YouTube channel (he does a video series which actually was of interest to me) and when I did, I saw that he was subscribed to this really sleazy pick-up artist channel where they give guys advice on how to pick up women (like "How to call a girl and get laid"). I know we've been broken up for 5 months now, but to find out someone I loved (who claimed to love me) would EVER watch something like that... it made me feel so cheap and like our entire relationship was just a game. So I know it's probably for the best but I feel awful
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