Adunaphel Posted October 20, 2004 Posted October 20, 2004 You are *not* horrible but I think you shouldn't talk to this guy a lot or hang out with him at all. I can see why you accepted the pizza (I guess I'd have done the same in a similar situation), and i see why you felt guilty. I actually think it's good that you feel guilty - I regard guilt as a warning that comes directly from your heart. How would you feel if your bf had had a pizza delivered to a female friend of his (because she burnt her dinner because she was on the phone with him). Or if a female friend of his that has a crush on him sent him a pizza and he was glad of the attention? My friend wants to hang out next weekend but I will be in Orlando but the weekend after that he said he would like to hang out..I kinda want to..not because I like him (nothing there) but because I like the attention that I can't get since my bf is far away.. You could talk to your bf about the whole situation (without of course omitting the fact that he likes you and the fact that you once kissed) and ask if he is okay with you hanging out with him. If he's okay, great....just be careful, you will be in a 'danger zone' even if you don't like this guy. Also, would you be okay with your bf hanging out with a girl who has a crush on him just because he enjoys the attention and you are far away?
Naive Posted October 20, 2004 Posted October 20, 2004 Awwwwwww that was so nice of him You cannot have a say in what someone feels for you. If he has feelings for you it's because you are a nice person and you cannot be held responsible for that, right? If you really feel uncomfortable by all his attention let him know.
Author EC Posted October 20, 2004 Author Posted October 20, 2004 Thanks guys for actually listening to my dilemas about pizza and such lol... My bf knows the WHOLE story kiss and all... He was iffy at first but then he told me "Can you blame him? I love you and so it would be dumb of me think of myself as the only one who does..But I know you love me and as long as he is respectful to you and doesn't cross any boundaries then it's ok.." So my bf knows and this guy knows that ain't NOTHING going to happen lol..and this guy except for the pizza thing has totally been respectful and has not tried anything with me he just let me know about his feelings up front and I said I understood but I was taken now and we've talked this out. He's just a good friend that buys me pizza! lol If my bf has girl "friends" up there and I just have faith that he is in love with me as much as I am with him and that he will act accordingly. They hang out all the time..and I'm cool but the first time that he neglects me or doesn't pick up my phone call when I call is when I will have a problem with it.
FreeMe Posted October 20, 2004 Posted October 20, 2004 Wow, I just had to respond to this. I had a guy friend who was crazy about me but I just wasn't attracted to him. On paper, we were perfect for each other and I tried to have feelings for him, but they just wouldn't come. I was always up front with him, but I know it still hurt him....especially when I met someone else - my current boyfriend. The boyfriend moved in with me and then we started having problems (partly because he was going through a divorce, partly because of my own problems, and partly just because his real self emerged - not that it's a bad real self - just not much like the guy I fell for). Anyway, I thought my boyfriend shared a lot of qualities with the friend, but it turns out, he really doesn't. So when things started going bad I started thinking about the friend and finally appreciating all those things about him that I didn't think were that big a deal before. (Like driving 30 miles to my part-time job just to leave flowers on my car windshield.) So where am I now? My boyfriend does not want me seeing the friend - even though nothing ever happened with us. It's understandable and probably better that my friend doesn't see me too. The friend still isn't involved with anyone. I have doubts about whether things can work with my boyfriend, even though things have improved, we are just so different, and I am wracked with indecision and guilt about ALL of it!! Even though I wouldn't try to get involved with the other guy right away, I know if my boyfriend and I broke up, I would at least be friends with him again, which could lead to something. Even so, I am guilt-ridden about the idea of breaking up with my boyfriend. He might not be divorced if it wasn't for me. AND I feel guilty about the friend - that I was so cold and matter-of-fact about not having feelings for him. What a mess. Like you, I was so sure that I could never have feelings for my friend, and now I'm appreciating all kinds of things about him and wondering if I made a big mistake. Be careful with this and especially with your friend's feelings. Good luck !
Betrayed in the NE? Posted December 21, 2005 Posted December 21, 2005 ---"But anyways yeah this pizza guy is a great friend and I know I can hang out with him without getting attachted besides im in love.. lol "--- Did you even think about this guy's feelings? He likes you REMEMBER? duh? COME ON THINK!! /sarcasm on But I guess you can string him along because you love the attention and the ego stroking he gives you. Right? Its okay because YOU are having a blast. /sarcasm off Stop being so selfish! Guys seriously...Dont feed this troll. I bet you she will be with the "pizza friend" in the near future. I can smell an attention whore. Priceless! Absolutely Priceless ... and very well said!
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