minimad Posted July 2, 2013 Posted July 2, 2013 Hi all just after some input on something that seems a little strange. ok my ex dumped me around 3 months ago. With I love you but not in love. She kept me hanging for 4 weeks until I had enough and left. A week after that I went NC and have been since. I did find out there was another man involved that she met on the internet but hadn't met in person. Now here's the thing more out of anger I joined a dating site. A few weeks after I joined I checked into it to see who had viewed me and there was my ex. Ok not so strange but the photos she used are of our last holiday, the profile photos are one she wouldn't even use on facebook so not her best by a long way. In her main one she is showing off her engagment ring. Her sister knew I was on the site but said she hadn't told my ex but I think she isn't telling the truth. this weekend I had a message from her daughter asking why she is not a friend on my new facebook account. Strange thing is the daughter had a lot of influencing on the break up (she is 18). I replied to her message in a caring way but didn't give her access to it but I had no reply. So sent another message yesterday asking her a few questions about how she is getting on. Still no reply yet. I know she has read them. there has been a few other little things. To me this seems like my ex is checking up on me. Maybe she is just moving on but after living with someone for 5 years you get to know them and this is what it seems to me its just games. Doesn't like it I'm on a dating site that I have gone no contact so not chasing her ego any more. Compleatly blocked her from my life. this break up has been the hardest thing I have ever had to do. Everyday is a struggle I still cry when I'm on my own. Not an easy thing to admit when your a 45 year old man. But I am going forward and know one day I will be happy again. what I'm asking is do you think its games maybe she is missing me a bit or just coincidence
Chi townD Posted July 2, 2013 Posted July 2, 2013 (edited) The thing you have to ask yourself is, does it really matter what she's doing? I mean, she dumped you for someone that she's never met! That should tell you where you stood with her. And, to be honest, you should be more insulted than hurt! If I were you, I would just continue with NC and focus on healing and moving on. But, I do have a question. She showed a picture of an engagement ring. Is that a ring that you gave her? Or is that a ring someone else gave her? If it's someone else, then that is one cold hearted bitch! Edited July 2, 2013 by Chi townD 2
Author minimad Posted July 2, 2013 Author Posted July 2, 2013 It was mine. I am moving on just think it a little pathetic after all she put me through. Why play silly games. only answers I can come up with is she has started to miss me. she is angry I'm moving on. she wants so sort of control. she wants me stroking her ego. shes just nosey about what im doing.
Chi townD Posted July 2, 2013 Posted July 2, 2013 She was being selfish and a little bit of an Ego stroke. It was like, "I can't believe I found you in here! I guess this shows what this thing on my finger really meant to you." It's probably stupid and a little selfish on her part.
Author minimad Posted July 4, 2013 Author Posted July 4, 2013 Hi. Long story short me ex girlfriend has been going to great lengths to access my facebook page. Creating fake accounts asking her daughter to get a friend invite. She even turned up on a dating site I joined ( I only joined out of anger). The pictures she has used on there are not pictures she would use normally. She dumped me with I love you but not in love line. But I did find she had met someone online. We had been together 5 years. now is this just being very nosey or is she starting to miss me. coming up to 2 months no contact I still miss her and love her.
athousandquestions Posted July 4, 2013 Posted July 4, 2013 Who knows. Don't lose sleep over her actions. If she missed you or wanted a second chance with you she would contact you and straight up say it. Do not contact her. Do not do anything! Just wait and see, keep healing and moving forward with your life.
aloneinaz Posted July 4, 2013 Posted July 4, 2013 or if you want to be a bit of a dick, find a hot girl and have her pose in picture with you all check to check and put it on Facebook with something like "this girl rocks my world".. But, I also agree with everything the above poster said.
Appleness Posted July 4, 2013 Posted July 4, 2013 Don't over-analyze. You're not together anymore, therefore her actions and intentions don't matter. Why should you care if she misses you? Missing you doesn't mean that she wants you back. Facebook stalking is very immature. It may just be that she's just playing mind-games. Unless you're into that sort of thing, just ignore it. Don't do online dating just to get back at her. Do it because you genuinely what to meet someone new and move on. There are actual people online who are looking for someone. Don't waste their time if you're not ready for that.
Talulah Posted July 5, 2013 Posted July 5, 2013 It seems to me like she liked having control and now she is losing it. A lot of people enjoy playing these sorts of 'games' if you can say. She likes having the attention and she wants to see if she can mess up the life that you are trying to have. I would never talk to the daughter again, she sounds like a cunning little piece of work.
Author minimad Posted July 5, 2013 Author Posted July 5, 2013 It seems to me like she liked having control and now she is losing it. A lot of people enjoy playing these sorts of 'games' if you can say. She likes having the attention and she wants to see if she can mess up the life that you are trying to have. I would never talk to the daughter again, she sounds like a cunning little piece of work. I think this hit the the nail on the head. My ex is 42 one of the things she said during the break up was she needs to feel young and attractive again although she is a very good looking woman. I always had the feeling that she expected me to just wait on the sideline waiting for her. I think me moving on has taken away her control. The contact from her daughter was cruel to play on my emotions just so they can see my facebook page and shows me I'm better off without them in my life. I know one day the daughter will drop her mother when something better comes along in her life she has done that many times before. the dating site was more of an ego boost for me. mine took a huge blow. But I wont string anybody along that would not he fair I am honest with anyone I meet on there. To be honest I miss my ex. but I miss the ex that was the loving woman I knew and to me she died and was replace by something nasty. She has to live with herself. as for me I know I will be better off in the long run. I have so many things going on that I would not of had before. I took a long hard look at myself and worked on my faults and the best bit is when people tell me I am such a better person. So my ex can have her twisted life and although it it sounds bad I hope it all goes wrong for her and that day comes when she sees how happy I am.
Talulah Posted July 5, 2013 Posted July 5, 2013 Yea, we all miss the person that they were. I think that nay good woman/man should appreciate someone who likes/loves them for who they are. If she is 42 and playing these sorts of games, then no wonder she in single now. Well, if this is of any consolation, she cares enough to stalk you and want you in her sick, twisted, life in some way.
Author minimad Posted July 5, 2013 Author Posted July 5, 2013 I did wonder if she has started to find the grass is not so green. 1
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