NYCGuy22 Posted July 1, 2013 Posted July 1, 2013 My longest streak yet!!! If I get through today, that makes 6!!!
lailax3 Posted July 1, 2013 Posted July 1, 2013 Keep it up. It gets better, slowly but surely. I'm on week 4 of no contact. Nearly broke it today to wish him a good birthday, but if I've made it to 4 weeks, I can make it to 5 weeks, then 6, and so on. There will be times when you want to break NC, but distract yourself. It'll be worth it. Good luck.
SmithJ Posted July 1, 2013 Posted July 1, 2013 Well done, You will feel better soon! I was on day 6 on Saturday but stupidly answered his drunk phonecall which resulted in a row so now I'm on day two again and I'm honestly starting to feel better now. You will too!
Nyclovin Posted July 1, 2013 Posted July 1, 2013 After 2 weeks of begging and calling. I'm now 2 months NC. It's literally the only thing that makes me feel better about getting dumoed after 5 years living with her. It's a tiny bit of control and she will never get to see me hurt again.
eddyctv Posted July 1, 2013 Posted July 1, 2013 My longest streak yet!!! If I get through today, that makes 6!!! It gets easier everyday brother!
Author NYCGuy22 Posted July 1, 2013 Author Posted July 1, 2013 After 2 weeks of begging and calling. I'm now 2 months NC. It's literally the only thing that makes me feel better about getting dumoed after 5 years living with her. It's a tiny bit of control and she will never get to see me hurt again. Nyclovin - If you don't mind me asking, what was the story with your breakup? Mine was also 5+ years and living together when she dumped me. I also did the 2 weeks of calling, emailing, texting, begging, etc - and it was rough! I couldn't stop thinking about her and trying to change her mind. Then someone looked me in the eye and said "Why do you want to MAKE someone love you?" - and it all clicked that I wasn't the bad person here. What made you finally stop all the calling?
Nyclovin Posted July 1, 2013 Posted July 1, 2013 Sure, the short version is that I wanted to marry her after 5 years of living together and she did not see that happening for us and although she claimed she loved me she said she was doing what was bet for both of us by letting me go. This of course came as a complete shock to me as I was a part of her family and although we had been having a rocky time , nothing crazy, just stuff most people go through driven by stress and the such I never thought she would turn to me one day and ask me me to leave the apt I had been living in for the last 5 years with her. During my 2 week begging stage after it happened she also turned to me and said " why would you even wan to be with someone who just told you they don't want to me Mary you" true words BT so painful. After the first few weeks of begging I blocked all of her and her friends on FB and deleted her number ( I still know it by heart) erased all of her pictures ( I can't delete a few on my dumb iPad ) and got my own apt. Now I'm at a place where I think about her most of the day, but I try and stay busy. I talk about her mostly just to a therapist as m friends are sick of hearing it. And finally I realized that nothing she could possibly say to me on the phone can ever fix the damage done. Best fantasy unrealistic scenario she wants me back= can I really go back to that after all the pain and all the embarsmet . Can I really go back and show up at holiday dinners and family vacations after they all know ..no! I couldn't face them. I can't face her knowing all she has had done to me and worse of all she hasn't even bothered to contact me in over 2 months too! Worse case= she calls me a crazy stalker and that I should move on and leave her alone already . Medium scenario = she actually picks up is nice but says nothing that matters anymore because she is not mine and not the same person I loved for all thise years and is being nice because she has to. Nothing good can come from contacting her. So since I had no control over the breakup and over a decision if we should be together or not the only tiny bit of control I do have is I decided not to let her know how bad she hurt me and I won't give her any satisfaction in knowing that I am thinking about her.
Author NYCGuy22 Posted July 1, 2013 Author Posted July 1, 2013 Good for you! I'm am starting to get to that place now. Why would I want someone back that can do that to me? My situation is a bit worse as she told me she was developing "feelings" for my good friend - who in turn told me he was feeling the same about her. A really f'd up situation. There were a bunch more lies to and her actions over the last few months finally opened my eyes. I actually deactivated my own Facebook for a few weeks because we have over 100 mutual friends and don't want to see things popping up. I just keep telling myself that it doesn't matter if I contact her. She left me...she chose a different life over me...and I am better than what she chose. This is her loss and I know for a fact she will regret it one day - but then it is too late. It's hard because you could never imagine the person you knew so well could turn into someone that you didn't know at all. It may be too soon, but I have a couple dates this week and I'm just looking forward to meeting new people. I'm still going to think about her, but I need to find the right person that would never think of doing what she did to me or anyone else.
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