LoverOfDance Posted July 1, 2013 Posted July 1, 2013 And if it does, can it be found on a dating site? Been on Pof for a few months now and everyone just seems to be looking 4 something casual. Left 4 a while because I got tired of guys hitting me up looking for hook ups when my profile clearly says I'm looking 4 something more long term. Beginning to wonder if anyone even cares about love anymore.
KungFuJoe Posted July 1, 2013 Posted July 1, 2013 It does exist. On a dating site? I have no idea. And it's spelled "for". 3
soccerrprp Posted July 1, 2013 Posted July 1, 2013 YES YES YES and by the way, YES. On dating sites, off dating sites and in between, there are people seeking love. Not everyone mind you, but they are there....good luck! 2
JustAReformedGirl Posted July 1, 2013 Posted July 1, 2013 Of course love exists; there are many different forms of love, and everyone has a different perspective of what it means to love, but it definitely exists. The thing that people forget about sites like PoF, Match, and eHarmony: you hear about their "success" stories, but never about the "failed" ones. The thing about those sites is this: just like in real life, people can lie. If a person can lie to your face about who they are, what they want in a relationship and how they feel, they can certainly do it on the other side of a computer monitor. That isn't to say you can't find a successful relationship through a dating site. It's just to say that, like real life, there are risks involved. Even some of those success stories won't necessarily stay that way. Marriages fall apart; some early, some after many years. That's the thing about relationships, in general; no matter how you wind up in a relationship, you're facing the odds of it either failing, or succeeding. IMO though? True failure involves never trying at all. So, if PoF isn't meeting your needs in that regard, try getting out more. I don't mean the bar, since that seldom results is relationships, but try to get out and socialize more. You will find love; it may last, it may not-but it does exist. You just need to figure out for yourself how you define it, and try to find someone who feels the same. 1
ChessPieceFace Posted July 1, 2013 Posted July 1, 2013 Beginning to wonder if anyone even cares about love anymore. Yeah I wonder that every time I look at the number of men thrown out by their wives for selfish BS reasons.
MrCastle Posted July 1, 2013 Posted July 1, 2013 Love exists but I also believe it doesn't last forever. You fall in love, enjoy it, fall out of love, find someone new, repeat. 2
Archgirl Posted July 1, 2013 Posted July 1, 2013 Love exists but I also believe it doesn't last forever. You fall in love, enjoy it, fall out of love, find someone new, repeat. That's not the love bit babe, that's the falling in/lust bit. The love bit is the bit that's left after all the slightly crazy hormones wear off. I haven't had it last forever yet. But i'll find it! 5
KungFuJoe Posted July 1, 2013 Posted July 1, 2013 I feel this way too but such a prospect doesn't exactly make me happy. But then again, neither does the idea of a forever love which I find almost equally disconcerting. Take it from me. It's everything those books, poems, and sappy love stories said it would be...and so much more. Love doesn't have to be suffocating, controlling nor limiting. With the right person, everything is just "better". I've been single, I've been in lust, and now I'm in love (AND lust). And I never want to go back. Single again? Forget about it. I do all the things I used to do when I was single, except now I have my favorite person in the world to share all my experiences with. Just last night, went out to LA with another happily married couple (our best friends). Had a nice dinner and drinks at Cut, shot over to Saddleranch for some more drinks, then head out to the strip club, honking and yelling at people walking on the streets. Everyone got tore up, got some ass and titties in our faces and both our wives ended up throwing up that night. It might sound like some juvenile crap to some, but this is how we party and have been doing so since we got together almost 14 years ago and don't plan on stopping anytime soon. I'm loving and living life to the fullest. In August, all of us are doing it up even harder in Vegas. I've been in a suffocating relationship where I felt I needed "release" every now and then. I thought that was just how it was supposed to be. Holy crap was I wrong. True love is just amazing. Words can't describe. 2
MrCastle Posted July 1, 2013 Posted July 1, 2013 I've been in a suffocating relationship where I felt I needed "release" every now and then. I have felt this as well. It's usually a sign for me to loosen the grip of my hand. 4
KungFuJoe Posted July 1, 2013 Posted July 1, 2013 You seem to have an awesome marriage (so awesome in fact that I'm tempted to ask whether you and your lovely wife aren't in the market to adopt a little brown child...of about 23 ) I mean, strip clubs and the Saddleranch!? Get out of here. Now, that being said, I'm sure you know that what you have is not exactly par for the course of every marriage but that's not even the part I think about. At this stage in my life my mind simply cannot wrap itself around the idea of loving someone forever. It's so far fetched it seems almost fairytale like. It's not the marriage, not the commitment; it's the sheer premise that seems so strange to me. When I think of love I honestly do not see myself finding and loving one singular person for the rest of my life. Frankly I take no comfort in that idea. I don't view it as some kind of prision sentance, I mean, it's not exactly dread I feel when I think of it nor do I desire polyandry it's just...well it's quite hard to explain. It's a bit startling actually now that I think about it. I'd consider adopting you, but I already have 3 kids. Though, you COULD room with my two daughters...they would love a new playmate. I know what I have isn't the "par" but I think it's because so many people settle instead of going for what they truly want. I think if you have the self confidence and the self worth, good common sense, and an open heart and mind...you are already at the top of the "game". Now you just gotta meet the right person (which is the "luck" part). But it's not that rare. The couple that went out with us have been together for 11 years and they are happy. I have a bunch of other friends who are married and happy (in various levels). Anyways, you're 23 so I wouldn't even stress it. When I was 23, I was clueless about women, much less love. When I was 25, I actually TOLD myself that I wanted nothing to do with relationships or gfs (had a tumultuous on/off thing with a girl for nearly a year) and that I was just going to casually date. That lasted a few months...I met the girl who would eventually be my wife and I never looked back. I told her I loved her after two weeks of being "official" (which is SO out of character for me), she moved in after 2 months, and a year later, we were engaged. **** just happened so fast, I didn't even have time to sit and wonder about what was happening. We just went with it. 3
TG1 Posted July 1, 2013 Posted July 1, 2013 Man as far as love goes, let's just say I have given up on it but you shouldn't because if you really want someone that badly, you have to never give up
soccerrprp Posted July 1, 2013 Posted July 1, 2013 Love exists but I also believe it doesn't last forever. You fall in love, enjoy it, fall out of love, find someone new, repeat. It wasn't LOVE in the first place. I wonder if people who have such a cynical view are not setting themselves up for eventual disappointment? Even in the midst of love, there are peaks and valleys. The key is, if it is LOVE, to have the skills, desire and courage to make it through the valleys to resume the longer journey through LOVE. Just my thoughts....nothing more.
TG1 Posted July 1, 2013 Posted July 1, 2013 It wasn't LOVE in the first place. I wonder if people who have such a cynical view are not setting themselves up for eventual disappointment? Even in the midst of love, there are peaks and valleys. The key is, if it is LOVE, to have the skills, desire and courage to make it through the valleys to resume the longer journey through LOVE. Just my thoughts....nothing more. You are right but at the same time people like myself who have such a cynical view on love are the ones who have either have been hurt time and time again or have been rejected time and time again, but I do respect your thoughts
soccerrprp Posted July 1, 2013 Posted July 1, 2013 You are right but at the same time people like myself who have such a cynical view on love are the ones who have either have been hurt time and time again or have been rejected time and time again, but I do respect your thoughts TG1, I hear you. Love is a partnership. It has to be reciprocated. I know that. I'm a HOPEFUL ROMANTIC, so that partially explains my perspective.
TG1 Posted July 1, 2013 Posted July 1, 2013 TG1, I hear you. Love is a partnership. It has to be reciprocated. I know that. I'm a HOPEFUL ROMANTIC, so that partially explains my perspective. Yes and I used to be like you being a hopeful romantic until I saw love the hard way having my heart broken but at the same time being rejected by girl after girl after that, so that is why I believe love doesn't exist anymore or at least true love anyway
soccerrprp Posted July 1, 2013 Posted July 1, 2013 Yes and I used to be like you being a hopeful romantic until I saw love the hard way having my heart broken but at the same time being rejected by girl after girl after that, so that is why I believe love doesn't exist anymore or at least true love anyway I apologize for my singular view on this. I am quite aware that I have not experienced loss and rejection as others have. I hope, even in rejection, I will remain optimistic and hopeful. 1
TG1 Posted July 1, 2013 Posted July 1, 2013 I apologize for my singular view on this. I am quite aware that I have not experienced loss and rejection as others have. I hope, even in rejection, I will remain optimistic and hopeful. Well that's your opinion and you're entitled to it, just like how we are all entitled to our own opinions but at the same time yes love is out there but at the same time others just have difficulty finding it
ThaWholigan Posted July 2, 2013 Posted July 2, 2013 I think love exists but differently for everyone. Me personally, I hope to only have one long relationship but it may not work out that way. I can realistically see myself being committed. For some, love manifests in a variety of ways, for some romantic love doesn't figure at all. 1
JustAReformedGirl Posted July 2, 2013 Posted July 2, 2013 KungFuJoe: Your marriage sounds so amazing! It's so refreshing to see someone who still retains their sense of self despite being in a relationship, and someone who enjoys all the stuff they enjoyed beforehand still, with their partner and even the stuff you might differ on. That's beautiful; kudos to you for finding such a wonderful, cohesive partner.
ThaWholigan Posted July 2, 2013 Posted July 2, 2013 KungFuJoe: Your marriage sounds so amazing! It's so refreshing to see someone who still retains their sense of self despite being in a relationship, and someone who enjoys all the stuff they enjoyed beforehand still, with their partner and even the stuff you might differ on. That's beautiful; kudos to you for finding such a wonderful, cohesive partner. I personally hope to be in a relationship/marriage at least half as good 2
shexy Posted July 2, 2013 Posted July 2, 2013 I believe it does exist but not for me! BUT, I have friends and family and dogs that love me, so that's fine with me!
fortyninethousand322 Posted July 2, 2013 Posted July 2, 2013 Love is about compromise. Compromising your future to the city council of Bethesda, Maryland. It's also about hiding in the kudzu behind your apartment, and not going in until the lights are completely out. Or so I've been told... 1
LOSTnMT Posted July 2, 2013 Posted July 2, 2013 Love doesn't exist, that's what I'm trying to tell you guys. And I'm not picking on love, 'cause I don't think friendship exists either.
soccerrprp Posted July 2, 2013 Posted July 2, 2013 Well that's your opinion and you're entitled to it, just like how we are all entitled to our own opinions but at the same time yes love is out there but at the same time others just have difficulty finding it Not disagreeing with you, TG1.
LOSTnMT Posted July 2, 2013 Posted July 2, 2013 I have messed around on POF, eHarmony and Match and I am not saying you cant find a good person on any of those sites but for the most part they are just places to hook up. Seems to me there are a plethora of other ways to meet somebody instead of meeting online. This is just my thoughts on the subject not saying anything bad about it if it works for you. 1
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