Bunnyrabbit Posted June 30, 2013 Posted June 30, 2013 I promise this is the last question for a while:) We were going to try mediation but he thought it was too expensive with $425/hour. So if we can agree on most things can I go file here in CA even if he's in another state? Here's the problem (that I'm sure you know of by now from all my other posts) I have to leave the country for a medical emergency and won't be back for a couple of months. He can therefore file in the state he is while I'm gone. But I don't see the advantage of that because we don't have kids or any assets so not much to divide. And I would have to fly out to where he is and he would have to pay for my travels. So not sure if he would gain much by filing first in the state where he is while I'm away? But IF I would to file before leaving there's no time to deal with this. Also, would the court freeze our joint credit cards automatically right away? I guess my question is: how soon does anything happen after filing and are we better of waiting with all this upon my return?
Balzac Posted June 30, 2013 Posted June 30, 2013 The "court" does nothing w bank accounts, credit cards, leases, mortgages, vehicle titles/registrations.
carhill Posted June 30, 2013 Posted June 30, 2013 Question: Will he have the ability to serve you internationally? IOW, will your location be trackable/known to him? Be aware that international process service can be very expensive, perhaps an expense he's unlikely willing to incur. The response clock begins once proof of service has been properly filed with the court. The same parameter, though perhaps at lower cost, will apply if you file and serve him in his state of residence. However, if you file and serve, the onus will be upon him to file a timely response or he will forfeit his right to respond and you can, if he does not respond in time/at all, file a motion with the court for a default judgment and ruling upon your original filing. This is why I suggested filing, because you can then control the timeline and feel confident with proceeding with your medical issues. Even if he files a timely response, you're under no further immediate time constraints, as the six month cooling off period will begin to run. The court issues rulings, orders and judgments. They don't call the bank and freeze credit cards. Filing sets a fixed date in time for forensic/current accounting of debts and assets for purposes of settlement/ruling in the future.
Arabella Posted June 30, 2013 Posted June 30, 2013 Bunnyrabit, as much as you don't want to, you're going to have to bite the bullet and either get some legal help, or do some real research of your own to understand how divorce works. As somebody who underwent a divorce recently that was much like yours (no children & amicable enough), I can tell you that we probably could have done it all ourselves, but.... it would not have been worth the time and effort. Call around a few lawyers and explain the situation to them. You will quickly find that some are willing to take on easy, non-contested divorce cases for a flat fee. I found a lawyer in his home state (NY) who ended up doing my entire divorce for $1500, and I was living 6 hours away in another state (MA). My ex and I had divided up our assets years before, and he cooperated with everything. My lawyer was the only one we used, since he trusted me not to screw him over. The whole thing was done and over with in about 3 months. 1
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