LillyGirl27 Posted June 29, 2013 Posted June 29, 2013 I'm a 20 year old female who just started getting out there and dating again, however I have only dated 2 people in the past, the last one didn't end well and I ended up feeling used and burnt out from dating for a while. I recently have gone on a couple dates with a 29 year old. We hit it off really well and had a lot more chemistry than I expected. We spent a lot of time together the last few dates and since he lives far I spent the night at his house each time. We recently just went on our second date. I told the truth that I didn't want to have sex with him and he said it was fine although the first date we got into very heavy petting. The second date, I gave him a hand job. Am I reading too far into this due to previous baggage or did I mess things up?? Part of me feels things went too far too soon as I didn't feel completely comfortable, but part of me doesn't care so much because I'm not attached or anything yet. But I do like spending time with this guy and hope this doesn't change the way he thinks of me. I don't mean to bug you guys with this topic. I'm just a younger girl inexperienced with dating wondering what goes through guys' heads. Should I see where this goes or do you think I made a mistake??
shexy Posted June 29, 2013 Posted June 29, 2013 I'm confused - you said you just had your second date, but earlier in your post you said youd been on several dates and spent the night with him several times? HUH?
pyramid Posted June 29, 2013 Posted June 29, 2013 NEVER go further than you are comfortable with just to please a guy.
Tinie Posted June 30, 2013 Posted June 30, 2013 Well you're the one who got into the dirty stuff right away. He didn't push you to it. I'd say see where it goes. It's WAYYYYY too early to tell right now. I'm also 20 and I'm spending time with a guy who is really sweet and I hung out with him last week and went on a date with him today. Even though it would be nice to know where I stand, and to pinpoint my feelings for him, I can't do that yet. There is a Russian saying that my dad told me once. How you cannot know someone until you've eaten a pound of salt with them. So far, you've eaten a pinch of salt with this guy- two dates is not enough. You need more time to get to know him (the pound of salt, rather than a pinch).
Author LillyGirl27 Posted June 30, 2013 Author Posted June 30, 2013 The responses were very helpful and insightful. I definitely agree, but I guess my question to everyone is...if we do hang out again, I'm sure he will be wanting more. Hey you guys are right...I agreed to go along with it so it's totally my fault if he's wanting more next time. I own up to everything I did. I'm just wondering if he thinks I'm just a tease when I don't get down and dirty next time, which I've already decided not to until I feel comfortable. There are a couple other guys I'm talking to at the moment that I'm interested in dating, but I like this one the most so far, so I'm hoping we can still get to know each other or do you think he may only want something sexual now?? Thanks to everyone who responded!
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