J.DAE23 Posted June 29, 2013 Posted June 29, 2013 Background: 2 months ago, we broke up. I initiated it because she said she was never going to tell Mom bout us (same sex relationship). Heartbroken, said I needed space and **** just got weird after that. We went from talking to no talking (largely due to my being upset and blowing up her phone every other second + plus the whole begging thing. After a month of going "crazy", she said some hurtful things, some things I think I deserved, others I don't. I decided to stand up for myself and go NC. Even though the things she said kept replaying in my mind, for a month I actually felt good. Yea I cried but I felt strong but then...today... I don't know what happened. I just broke down. Here's the surprise: So today I said **** it I'm just going to call her and break no contact. Last time I checked, a month ago, she had me blocked. So, when I called this morning, I was expecting it to go straight to voicemail but instead it kept ringing. I thought maybe she changed her number but then after ringing for a long time, I finally got her voicemail. As soon as I put the phone down, I get a call from her house phone but I don't pick up. Why? Scared shes going to curse me out.. 2 hours ago I sent a text saying hey (name)' What I learned: Still processing but a part of me is feeling like I am moving on despite my setback. I get the urge to call and text and ask why but I fight the urge, even as im balling my eyes out. Im not hoping to get back with her (at least not now) I just never had a bad break up. Ive never had anyone say "I regret being with you. This was a mistake". **** hurts. Makes me feel scared to trust anyone but Im praying that this feeling is only temporary and that my confidence comes back... First time poster, long time reader. Appreciate the responses...
bluegreen Posted June 29, 2013 Posted June 29, 2013 Even today my heart breaks when I think of that movie where young boy jumped off the bridge cause his fanatic religious mother could not accept he was gay. So I would give other girl a break even on your own even in your 40's some parents are just able to make you feel like worm with one look only over lesser issues. You should have answered when she called you would have known what's up with what but if you are really sorry then be a big girl call or write her an apology e mail. Let her take it from there either it will be good lesson learned or new beginning g luck ...
brokenheart99 Posted June 29, 2013 Posted June 29, 2013 no contact is a ridiculously powerful tool. im having it done to me, it is the worst thing i can honestly say i have ever had to endure. i wish it upon no one unless there were horrible problems in the relationship, abuse, cheating, lying, stealing etc. but for two ppl who are just not compatible, i understand its part of the healing process and maybe needs to happen to move on. but its terrible. when you are in a relationship, you love someone, u share your life and thoughts with them, you give your heart to them. to rip all that way without thinking about how it negatively affects the other person, its awful. but what do i know? im biased because its happening to me atm, and i cant believe it. but i hope it works out for you. you seem to be in a healthy place. keep truckin.
destroyed4sho Posted June 29, 2013 Posted June 29, 2013 I think breaking up with someone for that reason is very hurtful. It is tough to come out to family no matter what age you are. Having a good support system, a partner that really loves you and has patience can make things less stressful. Maybe you didn't want to go through all that, and that is ok too. However, you did dump her and dumpers also go through a grieving process. Just take it one day at a time and things will get better.
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