theonlyjuan Posted June 28, 2013 Posted June 28, 2013 * Become. Good start to a new thread with a mistake in the title lol Anyway I have always felt the need to always share my life with someone. I was in a long relationship before my recent one. I jumped into my last one a few months after the previous had ended. Don't get me wrong, I really liked my current ex but we were not perfect for each other. At the time I probably convinced myself we were perfect together and everything was great. Doesn't really feel like it now. I think I went out of my way to please her and be more like her type of guy. She hated football and I knew this early on. I loved football but pretended I went off of it while I was with her. She doesn't really like tattoos, so I put of getting my sleeve finished. There were other things like this. I realize I wasn't being true to myself and was living a bit of a lie. We did get on well, but we were a bit different. All the nice things I did for her were genuine, it's just how I am. I just feel I really have to sort this out and be myself. I want someone to like me for me. I want them to have the same interests as me. I don't want to become a jerk but I want to be more selfish. I want to do things that I enjoy. I want to at least be happy with myself and my own company before I decide to have a relationship with someone again. I don't want to fall straight back into having a relationship with the first person that shows any interest in me. I don't want to pretend to be things that I'm not. I don't want to neglect all the things I liked doing just to make them happy. Any suggestions?
eddyctv Posted June 28, 2013 Posted June 28, 2013 Stop pretending and be who you are...if she isnt into something you are into, that is ok...just dont give up things because your girlfriend isnt into them. Thats silly!
mtnbiker3000 Posted June 28, 2013 Posted June 28, 2013 * Become. Good start to a new thread with a mistake in the title lol Anyway I have always felt the need to always share my life with someone. I was in a long relationship before my recent one. I jumped into my last one a few months after the previous had ended. Don't get me wrong, I really liked my current ex but we were not perfect for each other. At the time I probably convinced myself we were perfect together and everything was great. Doesn't really feel like it now. I think I went out of my way to please her and be more like her type of guy. She hated football and I knew this early on. I loved football but pretended I went off of it while I was with her. She doesn't really like tattoos, so I put of getting my sleeve finished. There were other things like this. I realize I wasn't being true to myself and was living a bit of a lie. We did get on well, but we were a bit different. All the nice things I did for her were genuine, it's just how I am. I just feel I really have to sort this out and be myself. I want someone to like me for me. I want them to have the same interests as me. I don't want to become a jerk but I want to be more selfish. I want to do things that I enjoy. I want to at least be happy with myself and my own company before I decide to have a relationship with someone again. I don't want to fall straight back into having a relationship with the first person that shows any interest in me. I don't want to pretend to be things that I'm not. I don't want to neglect all the things I liked doing just to make them happy. Any suggestions? I agree with much of what you are saying. I also find myself spending more time and energy trying to please my SO than myself. And, it's not that I want to become a dick either, just be true and serving to myself. First and foremost. I have found the book (well, audio book) "The Power of Now" to make a lot of sense. I am only about half way through and will definitely need another pass or two to fully grasp the messages, but it seems to resonate with me...
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