jkepler85 Posted June 28, 2013 Posted June 28, 2013 A few months ago I met this beautiful, smart, sweet doctor and we hit it off. The past week or two things have kind of slowed down. She's always tired and studying and ends up just passing out by like 8pm, so I end up chatting with her sister for a few hours, which is fine because we get along well. It's just that I don't really get to do anything with my girlfriend. The first month we did a lot of things together, but this last 2 weeks or so, it's been pretty much her just passing out immediately. I guess I've been feeling a little neglected. It's made me think about my ex who was much more available to do things and stayed up late. I was originally a night owl, but when I started dating the doctor I altered my schedule, so we could drive together and and have some time to spend together. Idk just venting I guess
MidwestUSA Posted June 28, 2013 Posted June 28, 2013 You might want to rethink this relationship if there are times you are comparing her to your ex. Not a fair position to put her in at all. Doctors are busy, you know that obviously. I hope venting here helps!
StanMusial Posted June 28, 2013 Posted June 28, 2013 Kinda curious, what is your occupation? I can tell you from experience, as a busy guy, dating someone with a lot of free time on their hands was a pain too.
Brunettie Posted June 28, 2013 Posted June 28, 2013 Kinda curious, what is your occupation? I can tell you from experience, as a busy guy, dating someone with a lot of free time on their hands was a pain too. Why was it a pain? Just curious
rocketman122 Posted June 28, 2013 Posted June 28, 2013 there was a women who I dated who was a dietician. she had a private business but had a lot of free time. I mean, how long does it take to tell someone what to eat HAHA but because she had so much time she would think about me all the time and send me a lot of texts all day. it was ok but sometimes I was busy and she had no patience for a reply and nagged. I liked the attention but she seemed a bit psycho though. but youre dating a doctor. what do you expect? 1
StanMusial Posted June 28, 2013 Posted June 28, 2013 Why was it a pain? Just curious Because she didn't understand that I couldn't take every call or if I did I couldn't sit there and chat for 20 minutes. Or she didn't understand some of the sacrifices necessary to meet certain goals in life.
CarrieT Posted June 28, 2013 Posted June 28, 2013 My fiance was briefly married to "a beautiful violinist." Seemed the marriage suffered significantly as he worked 9:00 a.m. to 6:00 p.m. and at 6:00 p.m., she was leaving to go perform. The entire holiday season was spent apart as she had to perform almost every evening from mid-November through Christmas. I also briefly dated a chef who only had Mondays and Tuesdays available, was busy every night of the week, and would sleep until noon. In short, OP, you and your girlfriend may ultimately not be compatible if you don't have the time together to build a relationship. She may not be able to offer that time for a while, depending on her career choice. It is whether or not you wish to be flexible in being there for her when SHE is free or wanting someone in your life that has the same free time you do.
Mr.Mango Posted June 28, 2013 Posted June 28, 2013 Take heed when dating a doctor. Their schedules are the WORST, especially if they are on call. It's the sacrifice they have to make for their profession. It'll probably only get better once she retires honestly. (Know this from experience working in the medical field)
ChatroomHero Posted June 28, 2013 Posted June 28, 2013 I have found this type of situation to be almost unworkable. The most frustrating times would be when she would be so busy you wouldn't see her for a week or two and offer to meet her for lunch at work just to see her for an hour and get rejected because she had too much going on. The frustration set in when later she would mention meeting a friend for lunch after getting a same day invite, or she would have a quasi-plan to meet with you one night if her schedule allowed it and something would come up like a friend needed help with something. If you are a priority she can find some time. You can stick it out if you think it will change or if she truly has no free time at all, but the first time you go two weeks with barely seeing her and then hear about how she found time to hang out with an old friend one night, you'll have a pretty good indication where you stand.
Author jkepler85 Posted June 28, 2013 Author Posted June 28, 2013 It's not that we get no time together, I mean we sleep together every night when she's not on in-house call or working the night shift (on call is like 2 weekend days per month and 1 week of nights every other month). It's just that she's so zonked when we get home that most of the time she's too tired to do anything or even eat most of the time. I'd be happy if I could even just go for a 30 min walk or what have you. She's a resident and I'm just finishing a PhD program in engineering.
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