leoc1973 Posted June 28, 2013 Posted June 28, 2013 OK so I have been single for 2 years now. I have tried the dating website thing and also met some girls through friends and also a few girls have found me on facebook. In total I have gone on about 40 to 50 dates with maybe 30 girls. Here is my dilemma. OK so there have been 3 girls that I liked a lot. The rest I have had no interest in. With the ones I don't seem to click with it seems as soon as I part ways with them after a date they ALWAYS message me saying they had a great time and would love to get together again ect ect... And I mean literally every time except maybe twice. The 3 that I did like and I mean like butterflies liked didn't like me. Yes I know its dating and its not supposed to be easy and all that but my problem is that I am wondering if women can maybe pick up on that I like them so don't want me? Is this really possible that women really only want what they can't have? I can't believe every single one of them. Like without waiver. Ladies, Can you tell when a guy is into you? And maybe he does or says things he normally wouldn't if he wasn't? I am confused! Also, I would like a little advice. I just went out with a girl 3 days ago. She was initially interested in me and asked a mutual friend to fix us up. She told me before we even met that she was busy for the next 2 weeks. I also know that she went on a date with another guy. I asked her out again and she said she had plans all week but a friend of hers might cancel on wednesday so she would let me know at the last minute if she could. She also said if her friend doesn't cancel that she would be free Sunday. So anyways her friend ended up not canceling and we texted back and forth a little. Me teasing and her saying, "OMG you are super funny! I laughed so hard I think I may have peed a little" I messaged something after that and she didn't respond. She said she is really busy at work a few messages before that. OK so this was wednesday. It is currently friday and she still hasn't messaged me. What do I do? Is she waiting for me to ask her for that follow up date sunday? Or is she trying to feel me out if I am needy? Or is she just not interested. I have a female best friend and she says no matter how much she likes a guy she will act like she is a little uninterested. I am wondering if she is playin that game or not interested at all? I REALLY like this girl and I don't wanna screw it up. HELP!!!
zebracolors Posted June 28, 2013 Posted June 28, 2013 Ask her, but just toss something out there casually that you want do with her that day. Don't miss this opportunity if its there, and if it is and she is able/interested, she'll make time for you. I can only speak for myself as a woman, and others may do things differently. As a recent personal example for me, If I'm really interested in a guy, and presuming we're at least acquainted to the point if exchanging numbers, I will contact him at least every few days, to just ask how things are, or tell him things about how my life if going.(to let him know I think of him) If its close to the weekend, I'll invite him to do something out with me, dinner or whatever. Because if its gotten to that point, I'd rather meet up with him in person, and would be so happy if he was the one inviting me out or asking to see me. if I didn't want to miss the chance, I'd make time for him.
Author leoc1973 Posted July 1, 2013 Author Posted July 1, 2013 I live in New York tho. Girls are all about games here. I actually have a lot of female friends and they tell me some crazy things I would have never known. Like if they are attracted to a guy but don't see him as boyfriend material they will sleep with him right away but if they actually like the guy they won't sleep with him. They will make him wait like 6 or 7 dates. I think that is a kind of false advertising myself. They are leading guys they like to believe they are good wholesome women when in a sense they are really whores. lol(sorry ladies I love ya!) Also. they won't accept a date if its less than 3 days before the time you ask them. and what's the other one. Oh yeah they won't text or call a guy back no matter how bad they want to. It really confuses the **** out of us guys. We have no idea if you girls are really not interested or just playing not interested to make us like you more. Oh and it works trust me girls. Hard to get really works well with us guys. I have date no. 2 with her tonight. Any ideas from the ladies? like other than dinner and/or a movie. And remember it rains every day here so no outdoor activities. I am trying to get this girl to really like me so no suggestions about just taking her to a cheap motel and putting a good one on her. lol
Archgirl Posted July 1, 2013 Posted July 1, 2013 Ummm. I usually assume that the ones who tell me nice stuff like I'm beautiful and do that puppy thing where they look at you a lot and buy me flowers and call a lot are into me... Totes did not realise it was that complicated!
lanamarie313 Posted July 1, 2013 Posted July 1, 2013 Personally I have a really hard time figuring out if a guy is interested or not. It's not as easy as books/experts make it sound. The signs aren't so clear, and aren't the same across the board. So, I'd say SOMETIMES you can absolutely tell the person is into you. MOST times however, you might be leaning more one way than the other, but you're not really sure how they feel. At least that's how it usually goes for me. Where it's CLEAR interest or CLEAR disinterest, that's obvious. But the grey area? Total question mark. I think the "I peed a little" comment is a little immature. I wouldn't shut a guy down for it at all, but eh...save those types of iffy jokes for later on. Also, pleaseeeeeeee please follow up and text her for Sunday. If she's not interested, well then you'll find out. If she IS interested, and you DON'T text her to follow up....well, you'll lose her. So, not texting her is a LOSE/LOSE situation. She's a woman. She DOES NOT want to text YOU to follow up for the Sunday date. If you don't do it, and she did want to go out with you, she'll assume you're not into her. It's 2013, yadda yadda...but for the vast majority of women, the truth is, we still expect you to initiate, ask for the dates, follow up, etc. Do it!!
Author leoc1973 Posted July 1, 2013 Author Posted July 1, 2013 ok Ian I will. I think she was trying to be cute with the "I peed a little" comment. The thing that is getting me is when girls are in that "gray area" for me. Meaning I kinda might like them or I might not like maybe shes cute but still trying to see where her personality is at before I jump in. When in that gray area I admit I don't text or contact them enough and they are all over me. Texts non stop and they show that they are definitely interested. But when I am interested back then its like they sense it and back away a little.
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