All4ever15 Posted June 26, 2013 Posted June 26, 2013 About a month and half ago my ex decided that "he loved me but wasn't in love with me" even though two weeks prior he was telling me how he couldn't imagine a future with out me. We dated for two years btw. I was heartbroken but didnt act crazy...I definitely cried while we were talking but so did he. I told him I didn't know if I could just be his friend and he said the same but later in the convo when I said maybe in a few months we could try to be friends he didn't seem receptive. At the end we hugged and both cried and I was the one that had to pull away. Two weeks later I text him and said that I was so blindsided I wasn't able to ask the questions I needed for closure and asked if he would mind answering them. He did answered in a kind and caring manner and that was that. It's been a month and a half now and we have a lot of mutual friends and were both invited to an overnight getaway. I would not want to go if he went, it would be too hard, I still love him. I decided to text him to see if he was going and said "Hey... Are you going to the overnighter." He never responded...why would he just ignore me...it didnt end badly, I didn't go psycho crazy on him, heck I didn't even yell at him. Awhile later (like 9 hrs). I text him one last time and said "we'll anyway I heard you were invited and just wanted to give you a heads up that I would be there. Hope all is well with you!" And still no response....what's up w that????
BradJacobs Posted June 26, 2013 Posted June 26, 2013 Why do you need him to respond to you? You're not together anymore. I don't talk to exes. Never have and unless I have a child with one of them I never will. 2
Phantom888 Posted June 27, 2013 Posted June 27, 2013 I have never been friends with exes. I have to talk to my ex-wife because we have 2 kids together. I never understood the friends with ex thing. Maybe your ex just wants to move on. It's less painful to move on without communicating with the ex.
Author All4ever15 Posted June 27, 2013 Author Posted June 27, 2013 I get he doesn't need to be my friend and that is fine but is it that hard to answer a simple question? That's what I'm struggling with.
Author All4ever15 Posted June 27, 2013 Author Posted June 27, 2013 You are right everyone deals differently and I have to remember that. I have no problem communicating with an ex every once in awhile but he may not. The problem with this relationship is that we have the same group of friends so it is impossible to never talk to each other again and because of that I would think he would want to keep it friendly, not friends but friendly. But what do I know, I'm clearly not the best at love haha
D-Lish Posted June 27, 2013 Posted June 27, 2013 You're in a bit of a different predicament because you still share mutual friends. Personally? If it were me, I'd respond, just out of respect. It would be the right thing to do given the fact that he dumped you. Unfortunately, people don't always do the right thing- they often do what is best for themselves. Can you find out through the mutual friend that is inviting both of you if he is going? 2
simplyamazing Posted June 27, 2013 Posted June 27, 2013 I think you guys are being too hard on the OP. She is not asking to be friends. If it were me, and the breakup was not bad.. I would respond to something like that because it's mutual friends, and we were both invited. A simple yes or no from the ex would suffice. As stated previously, it's the right thing to do. OP, due to lack of response... I would not go if I were in your shoes. I wouldn't want to risk running into the ex and setting myself back further. 1
simplyamazing Posted June 27, 2013 Posted June 27, 2013 No, there's no 'right' or 'wrong' way to handle this. It's a break up. If he wants to ignore her, then he can ignore her. It's not 'wrong'. It's whatever helps him sleep at night. Disagree, but to each their own.
eleve82 Posted June 27, 2013 Posted June 27, 2013 OP if I were you, I'd do exactly the same thing he is doing - leading his life without you in consideration. If you want to go to this party to have fun with your friends - GO. And whether or not he is there, make damned sure you have fun regardless. There is no reason why you should stop living your life for someone who doesn't want you in his. 1
Author All4ever15 Posted June 27, 2013 Author Posted June 27, 2013 You are so right! He clearly doesn't want me in his life in anyway so why should I work mine around him. It's so hard to go from him being the most important person in my life to this stranger I no longer know anything about...breakups suck!
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