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Jealously of ex-husband dating someone...


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Posted

So - it was confirmed this weekend that my ex-husband has a new love interest. I guess he has been seeing someone for the past few weeks, as one of my friends saw him with her a few nights ago and another mutual Facebook friend of ours saw a few photos of them together.

 

The weird thing about this, is that I've been seeing someone for the past 4 months.

 

So why am I so hurt by this? Is it normal to feel this way even though I feel I've moved on? Has anyone else been in my situation?

Posted

Yes, this is normal. I've felt the same way about past boyfriends, which I had no romantic interest in them anymore.

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Posted

I've resisted the urge to seek out what she looks like. Although, my friends tell me she's really pretty. :o

Posted

Just out of curiosity - did you dump him? or did he dump you?

Posted

i think its pretty normal, i started dating prob 6 weeks after my split, i shouldnt have but i did but anyway it wasnt untill a few months ago i heard my ex was seeing someone , as long gone that our relationship is and the chances of working it out will never happen it still bugged me for a good week. i still havent looked at pics or tried to run into them. apparantly this guy looks almost exactly like me just a very thin version. which makes me kinda laugh a bit. but ya i think if you have had or have any sort of true feelings for a person when they date again it will hurt a bit. my ex just turned into a slut right away so i found that way more hurtful than her dating at least shes with only one guy now as opposed to different ones every weeekend. its been like 8 months so eventually we all move on. hopefully she finds happiness.

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Posted (edited)
Just out of curiosity - did you dump him? or did he dump you?

 

He asked to separate. I ended up filing the paperwork. I started getting serious with a guy (a co-worker) in February. I did check his Facebook page a couple times within the past few months and did notice a few different girls he was talking with that I didn't know while we were married but I didn't see any photos of them actually together. His page is more private now....

 

I don't why I'm hurt about this. I guess the idea of him with another person besides me makes me sick, even though I've already done it myself. I feel hypocritcal....Why is this? Why do I feel this way now?

Edited by StephanieLynn1982
Posted
I don't why I'm hurt about this. I guess the idea of him with another person besides me makes me sick, even though I've already done it myself. I feel hypocritcal....Why is this? Why do I feel this way now?

 

It's the old head verses heart. They act independently until both mutually reach indifference. This takes time. Over and over again you've told yourself that it's over, you're moving on, even started another relationship. Your heart, which can't be reasoned with or convinced, didn't read the memo. Sorry, but you jumped back in too soon. You know that now, right?

 

It's an error in judgement many of us make. I did it too. You rebounded.

 

On the bright side, you filed when he went cold, meaning deep down you knew it wasn't going to work. You'll pull through. Right now it's all about getting yourself squared up. Be honest with yourself about what is love, and what is need. Don't push what doesn't need pushing. Focus on what you really want, and who you really want to be. Live in the now.

Posted

I just happened to click on this and have asked myself the same question. I've been divorced 3 years, been with a great girl for 2 but yet.......for whatever reason I still care a great deal about my ex. She was TERRIBLE to me the last 2 years. we live in a small town so we come across each other on occasion and it always makes me uncomfortable which is odd because virtually nothing else does. I guess I was deeper in love than I realized.....

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