OUt of The Blue

[Graystreet]

I was head over heels for this beautiful girl I met when I was 16. For whatever reason we did not connect in a romantic way and time went on and we moved apart. 12 years later we reconnected on FB and we hit it off from the start. We fell instantly in love, well I did. We moved in together after a few months and we were committed.

 

A few months later we found out she was pregnant, we had a beautiful little girl. We moved to Los Angeles for a new job opportunity in business. I made good money and we lived comfortably. She however quickly became tired of the LA scene for some reason. After some time we/she decided we head up north to the Bay.

 

In the Bay (recently I might add) we came to an arrangement and that is; She would work full time, and I would go back to school and earn an MBA while caring for our daughter everyday. And so she found a great job, and I was accepted into Grad School. Things were very peachy for about a month.

 

Out of the blue (or maybe not), she decides she is over me and wants me to leave asap. Mind you, I have no money, I don’t work and spent all of my money to relocate and carry us until she found employment.

 

She wants me out. Gone. I am shocked!. She is completely out of line, yelling at me, she has called me every name in the book. I have never heard such hate from anyones mouth in all my life. She has taken the cards, the cash, taken my name off of every account and wants me gone. (dead is how she put it).

 

I am scrambling to find a job, the problem is, I care for my daughter from 6:30-5:00 every day M-F so I am unable to attend interviews. On top of that, she will not put our child in Daycare until I leave as to make my life more difficult. My laptop is mysteriously broken, my phone is being shut off, and I have no one that can take me in.

 

She is essentially saying, I want you to be homeless without any resources.

 

My lively hood is in my computer and iPhone and those are gone.

 

Any suggestions?

 

GS

[Ajax]

Graystreet, I can't say I've ever been in your shoes, but I empathize with you. It sounds like she's had some resentment building for some time and it's finally come to the surface. And whether or not you deserve it, you're getting the full brunt of it.

 

Without more information it's hard to say why she might be feeling this way. She may have found someone new, or just felt trapped by her situation with providing for you while you're at school and having a child she may not truly have been ready for. But that's no excuse for treating you this way, and indirectly your daughter.

 

I'm sure your first priority is the welfare of your daughter. And though I'm no lawyer, I imagine that as an unmarried father without a job, you're in for an uphill battle in protecting your parental rights regardless of the fact that you've been the main caretaker.

 

My advice... probably the obvious. If you can reach out to parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, friends... anyone who might be able to lend a financial or legal hand temporarily... don't be afraid to ask for help.

 

As for the mental and emotional toll this will take on you, This is a good place to vent and get support. If your school has a mental health counselor it would be advisable to make an appointment.

 

Good luck. Keep us updated on what happens and try not to get too discouraged.