NYCGuy22 Posted June 25, 2013 Posted June 25, 2013 It's been almost 3 weeks since my 6 year relationship ended and I can't get certain thoughts out of my mind - specifically thoughts of her with another guy. Does anyone have any advice? As much as I try, I wake up each morning and the first thing I think about is her - and then it continues all day.
Sheilalou008 Posted June 25, 2013 Posted June 25, 2013 It's been almost 3 weeks since my 6 year relationship ended and I can't get certain thoughts out of my mind - specifically thoughts of her with another guy. Does anyone have any advice? As much as I try, I wake up each morning and the first thing I think about is her - and then it continues all day. It is a rough one. You have to keep busy. The thoughts will be there at first and you may want to just sit home and dwell but eventually they will lessen. Take up a hobby, go out with friends, learn something new, go for walks or watch funny movies. It does get easier but you have to put in work to get past it. 2
Mack05 Posted June 25, 2013 Posted June 25, 2013 It's only three weeks. This is part of the grieving process. Ignoring these thoughts is never a good thing. There comes a stage though where it's not healthy. The book 'the power of now' was a great help for me, also the book 'getting past your breakup'. Working out morning and evening is a great thing as well. Try do a class. Going to the gym with a broken heart is really hard. Spin classes, circuits, MRT, pilates anything where there is group activity. Easier to work out in company. Just try have a healthy balance of dealing with the sadness and getting out and doing things you like. Too many people either spend their time wallowing or they do the opposite and keep themselves constantly distracted. There is a balance there for sure. I know something that I would swear by is getting into cycling. On the open road heading to somewhere scenic. Stay in a bed and breakfast and discover somewhere new. Just try do new things, the things you like, spend quality time with family and friends and work through the sadness when it comes..For me when the sadness hit, sitting quietly on a balcony with a nice cup of tea did the trick... 2
Own Worst Enemy Posted June 25, 2013 Posted June 25, 2013 because it is literally the worst feeling in the world. i tried so hard with this guy, i gave him everything, we had a brilliant connection - but fundamentally he thinks (wrongly!) that he's hotter than i am, and he wants someone thinner and blonder. so be it. anyway, point is, i have seen all sorts of advice on here, from "plunge right in and imagine him/her really going at it with someone else" to "take your mind right off it". i guess it's a case of working out what works for you. i have used a combination of thinking, "and so will you, OWE" whenever my brain tortures me with the image of him with someone else. sometimes that works. other times i find my brain yelling, "just f*ck off" at him whenever he pops into my head, and that seems to work a bit too. other times i just have to cry for a bit. i think between the combination it will get there. maybe one or more of them will work for you...
eddyctv Posted June 25, 2013 Posted June 25, 2013 I'm in my 3rd week as well, and I know she's moved on to another guy. Time is starting to heal my wounds.
LOSTnMT Posted June 25, 2013 Posted June 25, 2013 There isn't just one right answer. Everyone deals with these things for different lengths of time and in many different ways. I had all my breakup feeling happen well over a year after I knew it was over and I am still dealing with them 18 months later. Just keep your chin up and keep busy time will cure what ails you.
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