sarah1268 Posted June 25, 2013 Posted June 25, 2013 (edited) Ok so last weekend I saw one of my favorite bands and afterwards went to a club that was hosting an after party for that gig. When I was at the club, some random dude tapped me on the shoulder and was like 'nice hoodie, I have one too'. The guy was hot, but I didn't think much of it and walked away. About 20 minutes later the same guy comes up to my friend and I and asked how our night was going. I told him I saw the band that the party was for and how much of a fan I was. He's like oh really, I know all the dudes in that band, you should come say hi. I asked him how does he know them and he was like, um because I've played in the band for 10 years...I'm the bass player. I literately almost died. He was cool about it, I think he liked that I didn't know exactly who he was. Anyway he proceeded to get me and my friend free drinks all night. As the club started to close the rest of his band mates (who I also got to meet!) went back to their hotel. He's like do you know anywhere we can kick on. I did. So we went. Stayed out till like 7am. Then hes like, would you like to come back to the hotel. Obviously, we agreed. At this point I think he was being polite not to kiss me in front of my friend. When we got to the room, me and him were on the large couch while my gf (god love her) sat in the one seater. He proceeded to hold my hand and touch me but not over board. Then as soon as my friend went to the bathroom hes like, 'nows my chance' and just started kissing me! We didn't stop when my friend came back either. I regret not going further with him but I couldn't with my friend in the same room! We ended up joking and hanging out till about 11am in the morning until the band had to leave. He ended up putting his number in my phone (as his was dead) and on Monday I msged him, just light hearted jokes and stuff and hes been replying. I'm trying to play it cool but omg, I'm dying. His band is on tour till the end of the month and I know nothing will probably eventuate from this, especially since he lives in another state...but....I was thinking of asking him to come to my state once the tours over so we can hang for a weekend? Do you guys think that is too forward/ desperate? I think if I don't do something drastic I might regret it forever! Edited June 25, 2013 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
Emilia Posted June 25, 2013 Posted June 25, 2013 His band is on tour till the end of the month and I know nothing will probably eventuate from this, especially since he lives in another state...but....I was thinking of asking him to come to my state once the tours over so we can hang for a weekend? Do you guys think that is too forward/ desperate? I think if I don't do something drastic I might regret it forever! You do realise these guys do this in every town, right? 18
Carenth Posted June 25, 2013 Posted June 25, 2013 If you are cool with being his hookup whilst he is in your town then cool... I wouldn't expect anything more than that tbh. As Emilia said he probably does this in every town. You will be <girl from town xyz> and nothing more. 1
Lansing Posted June 25, 2013 Posted June 25, 2013 If you just want a hookup then let him do the asking out. I am sure he will call you again when he is in town. If you are looking for a relationship....probably best to look elsewhere.
crederer Posted June 25, 2013 Posted June 25, 2013 Yah, just a hook up. Don't get to caught up in it. Also, it's your favorite band but you didn't know the bass player? 6
Southern Cal Dude Posted June 25, 2013 Posted June 25, 2013 Hooking up with him isn't smart since you can bet he's sleeping with others at the same time. You don't know what he's picked up.
Maleficent Posted June 25, 2013 Posted June 25, 2013 The touring musicians I know don't really do this kind of crap. Even the players. For the simple reason that it's pretty much biologically impossible to stay up all night chatting/making out with a girl and drive back to the next town everysingleday Keep in mind that the probabilities of a musician dating a fan are very slim. The thing with musicians is the more a girl acts like a groupie, the more they'll treat girls like groupies. So if you're all 'ohmygosh ohmygosh swoon' over the fact he's in a band, he will most likely just move on to the next town and the next groupie. So go for it. Worst case scenario, he'll have some lame excuse and you can just tell him to shove it. 1
Lisa_Lisa Posted June 25, 2013 Posted June 25, 2013 I think it's great. It's fine messaging, but maybe you shouldn't ask him out. Let him do it. Other than that, yeah, don't expect anything but a hookup. But just have fun. It'll be a cool little adventure to tell when you're older.
sweetkiwi Posted June 25, 2013 Posted June 25, 2013 Last "rockstar" I hooked up with couldn't keep it up and gave me tonsillitis. 3
Emilia Posted June 25, 2013 Posted June 25, 2013 Last "rockstar" I hooked up with couldn't keep it up and gave me tonsillitis. trust you to have a story like this 4
sweetkiwi Posted June 25, 2013 Posted June 25, 2013 trust you to have a story like this It gets better. In the morning his fiancee came over with his kid and his mother, and she saw me in his bed but didn't say ANYTHING. The night before he asked me to marry him and told me I had the body of an Olympian. I promptly sprayed Bushmills in his face from laughing so hard and he said, "Okay, an Olympian from the 20's...". 3
Ninjainpajamas Posted June 25, 2013 Posted June 25, 2013 I think it's great. It's fine messaging, but maybe you shouldn't ask him out. Let him do it. Other than that, yeah, don't expect anything but a hookup. But just have fun. It'll be a cool little adventure to tell when you're older. Right, because telling people 10 years from now about how you hooked up with a band member of a semi-famous band that nobody cares about anymore, who sleeps with a different girl every weekend is a tale of an epic adventure. I would hope you have better stories to tell by then. 8
Southern Cal Dude Posted June 25, 2013 Posted June 25, 2013 I guess I should become a rock star then. BRB, buying a guitar... I remember reading somewhere if you go to a mall or a similar place with a guitar(even if you don't know how to play), you'll be more successful with women. 1
Sanman Posted June 25, 2013 Posted June 25, 2013 Also, it's your favorite band but you didn't know the bass player? This is the plight of the bass player, often forgotten. Having been one I can attest to that. 3
jma500 Posted June 25, 2013 Posted June 25, 2013 It never ceases to amaze me how some women line up to reward men with sex simply because they are on stage, playing an instrument, and/or signing. They don't know these guys but they are ready to strip off and bang them at a moment's notice. It astounds me that some people can be so completely bereft of common sense and/or intelligence. 7
jma500 Posted June 25, 2013 Posted June 25, 2013 You just jealous because you can't play any Nope not jealous at all. I have three guitars and in the near future will be taking lessons. For myself only. Should I end up playing on stage and women started trying to do this with me I would send them packing. You didn't like me then you sure as hell aren't going to have me now.
somedude81 Posted June 25, 2013 Posted June 25, 2013 Do you guys think that is too forward/ desperate? I think if I don't do something drastic I might regret it forever! So you would regret it forever if you didn't have meaningless casual sex with him? 2
jma500 Posted June 25, 2013 Posted June 25, 2013 For some women it's not just because they're on stage or even because hey play an instrument, for many it's simply the allure of the celebrity. There are women who would bang a local radio DJ in a major city for the sheer fact he's 'famous' and heard by millions. The sleeping with something plus the extreme ego boost of knowing out of all the women he could've had, he chose them. Even if only for a night. I won't speak to the intelligence of groupies since they frequently exhibit traits of many women, albeit on a grander scale. Women are attracted to power and groupies love the power of the celebrity, his ability to moisten panties with a look and seemingly have everything at his beck and call. Plus, the bragging rights. Dave Navarro grabbed my ass once...I'll never forget that night. I love you Dave! These women are bereft of intelligence and are apparently morally bankrupt as well. Imagine trying to slide through life on your backside hoping to score a famous guy. I prefer quality , intelligent women. They are hard to find though. Your biggest thrill in life is that dave navarro grabbed your ass? Says a lot about you and none of it good. 2
thefooloftheyear Posted June 25, 2013 Posted June 25, 2013 You do realise these guys do this in every town, right? What is this National Naive Woman Week?? TFY 1
jma500 Posted June 25, 2013 Posted June 25, 2013 See, man? If we stick to it, one day girls will be thrilled to have their asses grabbed by us... ...as opposed to slapping restraining order as they do now... at least they do so on me, dunno about you. I wouldn't lower myself to that level. I keep my hands to myself at all times.
Drseussgrrl Posted June 25, 2013 Posted June 25, 2013 I wouldn't lower myself to that level. I keep my hands to myself at all times. Oh come on lighten up dude. 1
Babolat Posted June 25, 2013 Posted June 25, 2013 Wow, what a sensitive topic for me! My last gf use to party with AC/DC, Bon Jovi, Whitesanke, you name it, all the 80s heavy metal bands. She told me she would go backstage with them, go to their hotels, they would call her in advance, get a room full of liquor, tell her to come with all her gfs...she said she was kind of a celebrity as everyone wanted to party with her so they could meet them. She told me she never had sex with them, that she just liked to talk with them, that they really mostly just wanted to talk. She said all of her gfs screwed them, but not her. I mentioned a particualr band to her and she said "yeah, I met the bass player, a great guy, my gfs screwed him, I did not". And, as she put it, every girl thought they were his girlfriend, for 20 minutes. I tried my best to believe her; it is what it is is though. Mixing drinking, drugs, rock stars, sex in the room, please...things happened. My point: don't be foolish! You are one of thousands, literally. This guy may have been a gentlemen; my guess is that is his "move" to get a girl like you back to the hotel.
Emilia Posted June 25, 2013 Posted June 25, 2013 What is this National Naive Woman Week?? TFY I know! 1
jma500 Posted June 25, 2013 Posted June 25, 2013 Oh come on lighten up dude. Lighten up? Why would I want to be a guy who walks around grabbing women's asses unwarranted? All that will get you is arrested or beaten to a pulp. Why I would I want to lighten up on that?
eastcoastgirl88 Posted June 25, 2013 Posted June 25, 2013 I've dated a few famous people. Just don't act like a groupie, don't text them first, don't act impressed with what they do and you'll 100% hear from him again. The above may get you laid but it won't get you respect or a relationship. Oh, and don't use "He's so busy, he might forget!" as an excuse to text him when he comes to town. He's famous, not brain-dead. Even famous people have memories! If you MUST text him as a "reminder" DO NOT do it the day before he's in your area/don't mention him being in your area. Text him 4-5 days before SOMETHING COMPLETELY UNRELATED, like an inside joke. Whether he hooks up a lot on the road you'll never know. I know a guy in a band who said when he was younger all he did was sleep with girls. Now he's bored of that and touring wears him out so he's more likely to want to have a conversation. Don't assume either way. Just act normal and don't do anything you wouldn't otherwise do. These guys aren't turned on (long-term at least) by you acting desperate. They will notice you when you DON'T act like every other groupie. 1
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