are we ending?

[rilo2056]

I’m not sure if I am being very insecure in my relationship or if it starting to end. My girlfriend and I are 25 and have been in a relationship just short of 2 years. 0ver the past few months we have been spending less and less time together. I completely agree that we should have our own interests and hobbies but I feel like she has no time for me. I have expressed this to her a few times and I have not seen any improvement.

 

Despite that, I want to marry her but she says that marriage is not important to her and it is very important to me. She is my best friend and I can’t imagine her not in my life. She says she wants to be with me and is 100% committed to me but I don’t feel it. Am I just fooling myself? I don’t want to lose her, but do we really have a future? Should I just be happy that she is committed to me even though she won’t marry me?

 

Or that even though I wish we spent more time together, spending some time with her is better than none? I can’t help but think that maybe she says marriage isn’t important to her only because she doesn’t see herself marrying me? I really don’t think I can break up with her but I also don’t know if I can keep feeling less than a priority in her life.

 

My friends and my family don’t know what I am talking about all they say is that they can see how much she loves me but why can’t I feel it, am I being insecure? When I look at her, I can’t help but melt. It kills me to think of not being with her. Any advice?

Edited June 25, 2013 by a LoveShack.org Moderator

[StrongLass]

0ver the past few months we have been spending less and less time together. I completely agree that we should have our own interests and hobbies but I feel like she has no time for me. I have expressed this to her a few times and I have not seen any improvement. Despite that, I want to marry her but she says that marriage is not important to her and it is very important to me. She is my best friend and I can’t imagine her not in my life. She says she wants to be with me and is 100% committed to me but I don’t feel it. Am I just fooling myself?

 

These are valid concerns and her actions aren't matching her words,so no you're not fooling yourself. Never ignore your gut or the actions of others when it comes follow through. ESPECIALLY if they promise improvement that doesn't happen.

 

do we really have a future?

 

Only if you both can reach a compromise that works for BOTH of you.

 

Should I just be happy that she is committed to me even though she won’t marry me? Or that even though I wish we spent more time together, spending some time with her is better than none? I can’t help but think that maybe she says marriage isn’t important to her only because she doesn’t see herself marrying me?

 

Only if you're at peace with your concerns continuing to be dismissed all the time.

 

I really don’t think I can break up with her but I also don’t know if I can keep feeling less than a priority in her life. My friends and my family don’t know what I am talking about all they say is that they can see how much she loves me but why can’t I feel it,

 

Are your friends and family in a relationship with this girl? No. You are. If you are feeling unappreciated & what really you want is being dismissed all the time then there is a very real problem here.

 

am I being insecure?

 

Yup, but not entirely without reason. Being on the same page with life goals & values is VERY important in any committed LTR.

[shexy]

IMO, if marriage is important to you, but not to her, that's something that might not be able to be worked out between the two of you.

 

You're still young, it could be she's just not ready to get married yet, but if she really has her mind made up that she doesn't want to get married, it's up to you to decide f you want to continue the relationship knowing the both of you have different goals.

 

If I were you I'd have a serious talk with her about your relationship, but be prepared for what she might actually say.