chaychay Posted June 24, 2013 Posted June 24, 2013 (edited) whoevers going to read this. thankyou. so as you probably know from my last few posts im having trouble with this particular ex. just to remind you the last time he came back he kissed me and said it was a mistake and left like I was nothing. well I blocked his numbers and cut off all contact. I was just starting to feel better when yesterday he whatsapp'd me of a different number. right so he comes back saying ive been thinking about whatever happened on that day, and since then ive been thinking about it, its been on my mind, I asked him what he meant, he basically wanted me back but what he asked me if he thinks were going to work after explaining to me that he has 2 jobs so he works 7 days a week and he'll hardly have any time for me but wants to give it another go. he said we'll never know if we don't try. I was hesitant I didn't let him in, we just had a casual conversation and I let him know that it hurt the lastime he left, he said the last thing he wants to do is hurt me, he also said things like, 'everytime I hear something about you, or see you, all these feelings come back' I explained that if hes still confused he can leave before I get hurt again. he wouldn't go. throughout the whole day we were just talking about life. Then comes midnight. and he tells me he's going to think about it, and ill get my answer in the morning. he said that the last time he forgot who he was because he became selfless around me and was so caught up on me, and he said hes not going to let that happen again. I kept telling him to just leave before I end up breaking down, I didn't know what to do it was all happening too fast, he explained to me that there is no one else he wants that im the only one he has feelings for. I kept telling him to just tell me bye and go and pretend like nothing happened he wouldn't do it. so he left me to sleep on it while he made a decision. I obviously couldn't sleep then in the morning he disappears without a sign. without even saying anything at all and just leaves me all over again. I understand I was an idiot for even replying to him, im so fed up I refuse to even use my phone again. I don't understand why he did that to me. ive tried so hard to move on after the last time, I guess I have no one but myself to blame for this, but I honestly didn't think he'd ever come back. I did the n/c thing and he somehow managed to get a hold of my new number. I don't understand why he had to do that, he was so determined to make it work one minute and the next hes gone. im sorry this is a lot to read I just need a little support or anything just to help get me through this, I hate this feeling. I don't know how to handle it anymore. Edited June 24, 2013 by chaychay
Author chaychay Posted June 24, 2013 Author Posted June 24, 2013 I cannot give you advice save to say that this is like my sit. My guy is loving and romantic yet if i pushed for commitment he would run. I know he has feelings for me but i also know that he does not want to get in deep, so this is what i think your guy is doing. He cannot handle it and runs. Cowards. They think that there is someone out there that is perfect for them but will probably end up alone, always looking for something better to come along. They don't know what they have until it's gone. It is probably that he was seeing other people in my case and just got too many sweets in the sweet shop, but still two years and the same sort of romantic gestures and it felt like love too. I think we know when someone love us. For some men, it is not what they want. And maybe the love just isn't their priority, as in my case. its such a horrible feeling. I love him and I know that ill probably never be able to neglect him if he ever needed anything, but I think he knows hes got the upper hand and wants to come back whenever hes missing me, wants to work it out and then he just disappears, its not fair on us if they keep doing that, how am I supposed to move on if he keeps coming back..
StrongLass Posted June 24, 2013 Posted June 24, 2013 its not fair on us if they keep doing that No it isn't. It's EXTREMELY selfish. how am I supposed to move on if he keeps coming back.. By not letting him have anything to come back to. Screen your calls (sounds like you've blocked him on everything already...GOOD) block any new number he calls you on and don't answer the door if he shows up in person. You got this
Author chaychay Posted June 24, 2013 Author Posted June 24, 2013 No it isn't. It's EXTREMELY selfish. By not letting him have anything to come back to. Screen your calls (sounds like you've blocked him on everything already...GOOD) block any new number he calls you on and don't answer the door if he shows up in person. You got this LOL yeah I got this, in the meanwhile, I need to get him out of my system, ive tried to distract myself by taking on different things, I read books I play the keyboard, etc, but I still feel so down and miserable.
Author chaychay Posted June 24, 2013 Author Posted June 24, 2013 im so angry and frustrated and just ugh. I posted about this before why on earth would my ex come back just to say goodbye again I mean what new level of stupidity is this I do have feelings you know , im not even joking at this point im so angry that if I actually see him around I will probably do something crazy and slap him into nextweek. whats worse is he lives a road away from me. why me why just why just why, I was doing fine for a couple of days then booom i cant even think of a explanation as to why he would even do that, like why spend a whole day convincing me you want to work on things and then just disappear? well. id appreciate some feedback and comfort because its been a really bad day for me. maybe a guys opinion as to why he did that, i didn't force him in to nothing, he did it himself and when i told him to leave he kept saying no, why do that if you were just going to leave me in the morning anyway?
Hopeinme Posted June 24, 2013 Posted June 24, 2013 He's a confused jerk. Period. Please dont contact him anymore. Cheer up x
Author chaychay Posted June 24, 2013 Author Posted June 24, 2013 He's a confused jerk. Period. Please dont contact him anymore. Cheer up x I wish I knew how too
Author chaychay Posted June 25, 2013 Author Posted June 25, 2013 I was with an ex for two and a half years. The last couple of my posts describe my situation. Im still hurting just as bad as I was. My ex keeps walking in and out of my life. Ive tried the n.c but he finds a way to contact me, I need help getting through this.
todreaminblue Posted June 25, 2013 Posted June 25, 2013 hey chay, he keeps walking in and out of your life.......because you let him...you have to stand strong and enforce the no contact.... if he doesnt respect that no contact rule ....then that says a lot about him.....it says...... he doesnt care he is causing you pain........he doesnt care that you need the space to heal...he doesnt care period....enforce the no contact stand up one last time and be strong.....dont back down so you can ...... give yourself time to heal.....((((hugs))))))....deb
destroyed4sho Posted June 28, 2013 Posted June 28, 2013 Is this normal behavior? No. He sounds sadistic. He KNOWS how much he hurts you each and every time he does this, yet he still does it. I know how bad you are hurting, we are all hurting on this forum. But, it is time to let go of him yourself and not wait for his final answer. It is NOT going to be something you want to hear, and nobody wants to be strung along. REJECT HIM this time around and go NC. Hang in there, you will be ok. 1
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