lookingforlovenyc Posted June 24, 2013 Posted June 24, 2013 Dilemma here...hopefully I can get some great insight on this... I went on two dates with this guy before he left for his home country for a few months. During that time, we kept in touch via email, mostly due to my initiations, though he would respond immediately. He is back now and just went on a date together. I was super flattered that as tired/jetlagged as he is, he still wanted to see me..During the whole time on the date, he would mention something about the "next time" we would meet and I would tease him about his "advance" notice. The problem is, his body language in public tells me that he is interested - he would stand very close to me as we are walking side by side, and as we are waiting for seats at a restaurant, his entire body is facing me and super close to me and there is full eye contact when conversing. And he'll always initiate a kiss. At the end of the date, he said the date was "fun" and that "we should do this again" also when he's not so tired/jetlagged...(huge time difference and it's only been a week since he's back) Well, during the beginning of the date, he told me about the issues he's been having at work and how he's looking to leave his position for another within the company and has been applying to jobs... Since that date, his communication has been very lacking as if it's gone back to where we started - before we met. His messages are short and only in response to my texts and not engaging. It is confusing the heck out of me! To avoid appearing needy, I haven't really initiated much contact as to let him "bounce back" from withdrawing... I'm very interested but at this point, I don't know whether or not I should move on or keep trying. It's been four days since our last date (third one and we've only gone as far as tongue hockeying) and there has been no mention of seeing me again. He's also been a real gentleman - first kiss on second date and paying for all our dates. Prior to him leaving, we were constantly texting back and forth and now it seems like he's retreating..I understand that he is dealing with personal work issues but the fact that he could be too busy to drop me a line is an excuse, though he hasn't verbalized that to me, except explaining his current situation to me on the date.. What could he possibly be thinking? Is he really just that stressed to be half-silent? Is he really interested or just trying to play his cards right? I'm confused! Someone help please!
Steph321 Posted June 24, 2013 Posted June 24, 2013 I'm sorry to say this but if he was really feeling it, he would make the time and he would be reaching out to YOU. Stop initiating and let him do the chasing. I know it's difficult, especially since you really like him, but it is the only way you'll know if he's truly interested at this stage. 4 days is too long to set up a next date, especially in the beginning. He should have set up the next date at the end of the 3rd ("so when can I see you again?" "What are your plans this weekend?") etc.. It sounds like there was some sort of chemistry which is good, but the dude needs to step it up! He may be stressed but a phone call or text to invite you out only takes a few mins. You say you have been texting back and forth and he isn't as responsive lately? What exactly are these text messages about? 1
Tinie Posted June 24, 2013 Posted June 24, 2013 A guy who is truly interested in you is going to make at least a little time for you, even if he's really busy. Sending a sweet text takes only a minute. Or a short phone call just to see how you're doing. He's doing a bad job to show his interest, if there even is any. 1
Author lookingforlovenyc Posted June 24, 2013 Author Posted June 24, 2013 thanks for the insight. in the past it was a lot of teasing, now it's calmed down since he's been back as if he's withdrawing but meanwhile he was able to reinitiate that third date. I'm not going to chase him. He knows how to reach me. I guess if a whole week goes by and I don't hear from him, I'll have my answer and be able to say NEXT! I'll be down about it but....I'm sure I'll live.
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