thatone Posted June 24, 2013 Posted June 24, 2013 And while I'm at it, the above facts are why ALL of these threads on this forum about sex are, to be honest, quite ridiculous. There are women obsessed with the sexual activity of men and men obsessed with the sexual activity of women and neither of them seem to stop and consider the fact that the relationship they want will not be determined by anyone's sexual past or lack thereof. Otherwise what will they have to judge people by when they're old and grey and don't have sex anymore?
Phantom888 Posted June 24, 2013 Posted June 24, 2013 Hi everyone, I've been dating my boyfriend for 6 months. We're both 21. I have only been with 2 guys sexually (including my current boyfriend). He never really told me the exact number of partners he's had in the past, but I know he's been with a lot more people than I have (probably 5-10). He told me he had one night stands, and that he lost his virginity when he was only 13. He also said that if we are to break up one day, he will start looking for one night stands again. I'm not sure how normal it is for guys to have one night stands, but it's clearly bothering me that my boyfriend is capable of having sex with people that he doesn't even know. I have been cheated on in the past, by the person whom I lost my virginity to. I am just so overwhelmed by the fear that I will be cheated on again, especially whenever I think about how my boyfriend is willing to have sex with random people. These thoughts have been killing me, and recently I started bugging my boyfriend with questions such as: 'Why are you so sure you won't be looking for one night stands while you're with me? Don't you think it's dirty and inappropriate to have sex with people you don't even know?' I've even gone so far as to become angry at him for having one night stands in the past. I know the fear/anger that I have is somewhat irrational...or is it? What should I do? Please help me. This is not uncommon. If you think BF is worth keeping, go see a therapist. It's hard to get past this on your own. I know. I dated a woman who used to have one-night stands 10 years before I met her. It drove me nuts. I saw a therapist, and she helped me resolved my thoughts. But I eventually broke up with her because she was not for me.
dasein Posted June 24, 2013 Posted June 24, 2013 OP, try a thought experiment, if he had only two partners, but had sex with each of them 200-300 times, would you like that any better than being with ten people a few times? This whole concern could be easily overcome with some thought on your part. People have sex, and more and more people have more and more sex earlier today. Thread amazes me in general. Once more the LS double standard for male and female posters kicks in. Can't wait to see the next male poster make a similar thread and be lectured ad infinitum, if not treated in an outright nasty way by the hordes of hypocrites here. 2
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