mesmerized Posted June 23, 2013 Posted June 23, 2013 1. By choice. 2. I fail to see how my single status has any bearing on whether LS is representative of the real world. 3. I also fail to see why you think saying that, YET AGAIN AS YOU OFTEN DO, clearly as an attempted dig, is productive or helpful to anyone at all? That's not nice. If it's representative of the real you, that's sad. So you met a lot of great men but decided to stay single anyway?? Your threads and posts clearly indicate that you want a relationship and a family so its not exactly by choice. I guess I just don't like when people act like everything is ok when they themselves are struggling. 2
Ripnet Posted June 23, 2013 Posted June 23, 2013 People who claim to be single by choice don't date. They don't want a relationship or a family. I'm single by choice because I don't date or do I care to. If a met a wonderful woman and I was dating I wouldn't be single. I think a lot of people have this unrealistic expectation. It doesn't matter anyways there's been a study where the researcher found men are happier than women, it didn't matter if the woman was single, in a relationship or married. So much for having a job makes you happy.
Ripnet Posted June 23, 2013 Posted June 23, 2013 Dude...you are basing your opinion off LOVESHACK posts and threads??? Are you SERIOUS? Please, for the love of GOD, tell me this is all just a joke you're playing on us. hahahaha...very funny...you got me! Well played, sir...well played. Well most people done have the guts to say thing in person.
Star Gazer Posted June 23, 2013 Posted June 23, 2013 So you met a lot of great men but decided to stay single anyway?? Your threads and posts clearly indicate that you want a relationship and a family so its not exactly by choice. I guess I just don't like when people act like everything is ok when they themselves are struggling. It's absolutely by choice. I do want marriage and a family, and I could have had it 10x over by now. But I won't settle. I know what I deserve, and I won't accept less. So yes, I'm CHOOSING to be single, rather than accept the options before me. :shrug: But you can keep trying to poke me with that mean-spirited stick of yours; it seems to be the only thing that satisfies you.
Star Gazer Posted June 23, 2013 Posted June 23, 2013 People who claim to be single by choice don't date. I date a couple times a week, on average. I'm single, by choice.
fortyninethousand322 Posted June 23, 2013 Posted June 23, 2013 If someone has the luxury of not settling, obviously they shouldn't settle. As for the rest of us: beggars cannot be choosers. I would not recommend that the average person hold out for what they "deserve". That's a recipe for disaster. Most of us aren't worth half what we think we are... 5
mesmerized Posted June 23, 2013 Posted June 23, 2013 It's absolutely by choice. I do want marriage and a family, and I could have had it 10x over by now. But I won't settle. I know what I deserve, and I won't accept less. So yes, I'm CHOOSING to be single, rather than accept the options before me. :shrug: But you can keep trying to poke me with that mean-spirited stick of yours; it seems to be the only thing that satisfies you. Bleh. Anyone can have someone, specially if they go below their league. Obviously you're not finding a man that is worth it or you wouldn't be single. By choice is more when you don't want a relationship not when your options are crap lol 3
Ripnet Posted June 23, 2013 Posted June 23, 2013 I date a couple times a week, on average. I'm single, by choice. Big difference I'm not dating, I never want marriage. You are doing both. You are not getting what you're looking for so you are not single by choice but the fact you can't find a suitable man for you because you they don't meet your expectations. 4
Star Gazer Posted June 23, 2013 Posted June 23, 2013 Bleh. Anyone can have someone, specially if they go below their league. Obviously you're not finding a man that is worth it or you wouldn't be single. By choice is more when you don't want a relationship not when your options are crap lol That's your opinion. If I wanted a relationship right now, I could have one. I want a relationship with THE RIGHT PERSON. The right person is not before me, thus I'm remaining single by choice. Your negativity is palpable. You should look into that. 1
Star Gazer Posted June 23, 2013 Posted June 23, 2013 If someone has the luxury of not settling, obviously they shouldn't settle. As for the rest of us: beggars cannot be choosers. I would not recommend that the average person hold out for what they "deserve". That's a recipe for disaster. Most of us aren't worth half what we think we are... Sorry you feel that way. I'm probably worth more than I give myself credit for.
Ripnet Posted June 23, 2013 Posted June 23, 2013 That's your opinion. If I wanted a relationship right now, I could have one. I want a relationship with THE RIGHT PERSON. The right person is not before me, thus I'm remaining single by choice. Your negativity is palpable. You should look into that. Says the person with a negative signature. 2
mesmerized Posted June 23, 2013 Posted June 23, 2013 That's your opinion. If I wanted a relationship right now, I could have one. I want a relationship with THE RIGHT PERSON. The right person is not before me, thus I'm remaining single by choice. Your negativity is palpable. You should look into that. I guess logic to you sounds negative. 2
Star Gazer Posted June 23, 2013 Posted June 23, 2013 Says the person with a negative signature. What's with the "says the..." type responses in this thread? How are they responsive to the OP, productive, helpful, etc.? It's quite immature. My signature is actually quite positive - for women. We don't need you, we don't need to settle.
Star Gazer Posted June 23, 2013 Posted June 23, 2013 I guess logic to you sounds negative. How does my CHOICE sound negative? How does choosing not to settle, and choosing to wait until I find the RIGHT person for me sound negative? Rather than sit here pouting about not having found Mr. Right, I am putting a very positive spin on it. YOU are the one putting the negative spin on my current relationship status, starting with, "Says the mid-30's single girl" comment.
Ripnet Posted June 23, 2013 Posted June 23, 2013 What's with the "says the..." type responses in this thread? How are they responsive to the OP, productive, helpful, etc.? It's quite immature. My signature is actually quite positive - for women. We don't need you, we don't need to settle. When you're pointing things about something a person is doing and you're doing the same. It's a reminder that you're doing the same thing. If that's immature than so be it.
Ripnet Posted June 23, 2013 Posted June 23, 2013 If someone has the luxury of not settling, obviously they shouldn't settle. As for the rest of us: beggars cannot be choosers. I would not recommend that the average person hold out for what they "deserve". That's a recipe for disaster. Most of us aren't worth half what we think we are... Trust me on this you might change your mind once you can get plenty of dates lol
kaylan Posted June 23, 2013 Posted June 23, 2013 How is it a choice, when if you had a suitable man before you (the right guy), that you would settle down? My situation is most definitely a choice. If the perfect girl came along, Id stay single, as Im not ready for a relationship just yet. Im legit still sorting my life out and figuring myself out. Your choice is based on circumstance, mine isnt. Thats what they are getting at. 1
Star Gazer Posted June 23, 2013 Posted June 23, 2013 How is it a choice, when if you had a suitable man before you (the right guy), that you would settle down? My situation is most definitely a choice. If the perfect girl came along, Id stay single, as Im not ready for a relationship just yet. Im legit still sorting my life out and figuring myself out. Your choice is based on circumstance, mine isnt. Thats what they are getting at. I see it as a choice because I have control over whether or not I'm single. That's what I'm getting at. I also prefer a more positive spin; they're both hell bent on putting me down, and I'm tired of it.
Ninjainpajamas Posted June 23, 2013 Posted June 23, 2013 If someone has the luxury of not settling, obviously they shouldn't settle. As for the rest of us: beggars cannot be choosers. I would not recommend that the average person hold out for what they "deserve". That's a recipe for disaster. Most of us aren't worth half what we think we are... I agree with this to the extent that many people have unrealistic expectations and exaggerate what they have to offer without objectively really comparing themselves to others and really understand what they bring to the table as a "package". It's natural to think of yourself as special, I've known plenty of uglies and people with nasty qualities they think were the cream of the crop holding themselves to a very high standard, and some people say "well let them think that way"...weelp I do, I've never date them! But the point being is, that if you don't have options...you might want to reassess how "desirable" of a package you are, someone who is desirable is going to have options, and not just with the less than optimal versions. That is also relative to what you desire though, as long as you're getting what YOU want, although I'm free to be opinionated in the matter of them having bad taste in men/women As far as commitment goes, it's hard to get the guy with options to commit...and that's the guy many women from my experience want to get their hooks in. Every time it's the guy that's all in and all for it, something isn't good enough, something doesn't feel right....I swear as a guy if you have one leg in, or even one toe...can make a lot half-hearted or empty promises while putting that woman on ice in the progression realm, she's way more likely to hunt you down. That guy seems to be seen as more desirable, but that also works with men too to a degree...they're obviously going to sleep with whoever, but the girl that gives chase he's going to step it up for...even if it's just to divide and conquer. I think people are way too idealistic and unrealistic, not to mention just young to really understand what commitment is, let alone marriage. The only people in my mind who know what marriage really takes are those who have spent years in it, not just in the honey moon phase or some short period of time...I'm talking as an adult and over the course of 8 years plus at least, maybe even 20...that's a feat to me. Which is exactly why I've asked these specific people personally in my life about marriage, because I've wanted to know "what's it's all about"...and honestly, based on everything I've heard from many people, I don't know if that's the "road to happiness" in fact many of these people collectively told me not to get married young and so I definitely took their advice, I've taken the advice of my elders when young because I figured they knew what they were talking about and I'm glad I did. As far as commitment and marriage and all of that, I don't know people, I guess that's a personal choice, both sides have their negatives and positives...if you can get through life without having to commit, I can't say I'd blame many for doing that, there's a lot of obligation and accountability to marriage and relationships...when single you've got to just be accountable to yourself and I've known a lot of married couples who wish they could make that choice...but with kids and the family unit, most I noticed aren't going to make that decision until at least the kids are grown up and I guess just grovel in unhappiness and discontent in their marriages until then...I understand it and get it, I know the majority of people put their kids first once they have them, but personally I don't know if that does more harm than good, or teaches them the right lesson...but without having kids I think it's difficult to say...overall I see people get married and stay married for other reasons than "true love" or "the one", which is a difficult pill to swallow at least for me, and I'm not so naive to just assume I'm better or just extremely lucky, especially when all the dodo heads are thinking the same thing...you know somethings wrong when that many people are full of it. 1
Ripnet Posted June 23, 2013 Posted June 23, 2013 Just pointing it out and telling like it is. I have nothing against you. 1
mortensorchid Posted June 23, 2013 Posted June 23, 2013 I can honestly say that I have dated quite a bit in the world, and there is no such thing as a true commitment phobe. Every man I have ever been with (with only a few exceptions) have broken it off. Many have done and said horrible things to get out of it. And ALL of them (with one exception that I know of) are all married/divorced/in relationships today. And they are married/divorced/in relationships with trashy girls rather than me. Bitter? Yes it is. And I am bitter because I have gained this knowledge : Men really want someone who is lesser than they are. They want someone who has less success, less charisma, and bows down to them. And I say "let them". They do not deserve a relationship without drama. They would rather have trash because trashy girls will provide them with this. And they do not deserve a good woman who is willing to provide them with stability, happiness and good adventures.
hppr Posted June 23, 2013 Posted June 23, 2013 If someone has the luxury of not settling, obviously they shouldn't settle. As for the rest of us: beggars cannot be choosers. I would not recommend that the average person hold out for what they "deserve". That's a recipe for disaster. Most of us aren't worth half what we think we are... It all depends on how self-aware someone is and their attitude towards other people in general. Also, some people are commitment-phobes or have emotional/behavioral issues that get in the way. Like depression, or very dominant personalities. Personally I guess I'm a commitment phobe. Bad experiences with women in the past and watching my friends get married (and after a couple years most of them hate it) makes me think that the whole marriage thing today is a bad idea.
kaylan Posted June 23, 2013 Posted June 23, 2013 I see it as a choice because I have control over whether or not I'm single. That's what I'm getting at. I also prefer a more positive spin; they're both hell bent on putting me down, and I'm tired of it. And you never do this to people? You just did it to me in another thread when I didnt provoke you at all. And you were also going after 'missjackie' in a recent thread regarding her boyfriends trip to france. Ever consider that people go after you based on how you present yourself? 2
ThaWholigan Posted June 23, 2013 Posted June 23, 2013 I don't blame them. That doesn't mean I identify with them however. 1
Star Gazer Posted June 23, 2013 Posted June 23, 2013 I have gained this knowledge : Men really want someone who is lesser than they are. They want someone who has less success, less charisma, and bows down to them. And I say "let them". They do not deserve a relationship without drama. They would rather have trash because trashy girls will provide them with this. And they do not deserve a good woman who is willing to provide them with stability, happiness and good adventures. I completely agree. Let them.
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