bilatong Posted June 22, 2013 Posted June 22, 2013 Hi All, Can you help me with this one. I just met a guy (well someone i've liked quietly for a while) we went out a couple of times and he gave the impression he'd like to go out again but it didn't happen and won't happen. He was very upfront with me in the beginning after we met that he wasn't ready for a relationship (recently gun shy from an intense one he said) but wanted to see where things went. I like to get to know people first so I figured ok (yes don't tell me I know already it would go nowhere). Anyway, though very early days i found my self getting invested (again please don't tell me i know its bad). He seemed to be interested in meeting with me but only if I wanted to and I got the sense that he was holding back something for some reason through my interaction with him. I think he sensed i was getting invested and effectively pulled away. We didn't hook up, make out or get intimate nor did he try to overtly or subtly. When we met up it was relaxed, friendly really no pressure. I don't think he was after sex, well it didn't look like it. My question is if a guy senses that you are getting invested despite him stating he's not looking for a relationship will he just disappear because he cares, its the decent thing to do and he doesn't want to string you along? Also, why did he even bother in the first place, I can't figure what he could have been seeking, probably on the rebound. I haven't contacted him in a while nor has he me; just not sure what to make of it besides it wasn't going to go anywhere. I do give him respect for being upfront though.
KatZee Posted June 22, 2013 Posted June 22, 2013 Yea I mean right out of the gate he said he wasn't looking for anything and you put out the "girlfriend" vibe. He doesn't want to lead you on. 1
truth_seeker Posted June 22, 2013 Posted June 22, 2013 He was after sex and tried to cover that up by saying he wasn't interested in a relationship. He wanted to see if you would give it up easily - you didn't - so he bailed.
Keenly Posted June 22, 2013 Posted June 22, 2013 He was after sex and tried to cover that up by saying he wasn't interested in a relationship. He wanted to see if you would give it up easily - you didn't - so he bailed. Because all men ALWAYS only want sex right? 4
Ami1uwant Posted June 22, 2013 Posted June 22, 2013 hard to read his intent. He may have been interested in dating with you and you were nice but he didnt feel it and checked out He may have been interested in you but your nonverbal communication was saying to him dont both you arent getting any until there is a ring on this finger....thus he checked out You werent the only one he was dating....he found someone else he felt he connected with on a higher level thus he opted to persue you but still left you hanging without communication because he felt he might come back to you if Girl a didnt workout.
truth_seeker Posted June 22, 2013 Posted June 22, 2013 Because all men ALWAYS only want sex right? No. I'm going on what the OP described.
Lansing Posted June 24, 2013 Posted June 24, 2013 If I am the one making all of the effort trying to keep a platonic relationship going at some point I will just drop it and let the other person (guy or girl) contact me. This could be part of it for him. I personally don't think he is looking for sex based on what OP said.
Imajerk17 Posted June 24, 2013 Posted June 24, 2013 It sounds to me that his interest level was only moderate. Your getting invested early on and it showing probably had little to do with him pulling away.
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