hs994 Posted June 20, 2013 Posted June 20, 2013 Basically to make my situation easier to understand ... My GF of 2 years and I broke up a month ago (Long Distance Relationship) .. and this was due to communication issues and generally the fact that Long distance got to us both, because we would be upset more etc. She wanted to be friends still, something I didn't really want because I love her a lot and it would just be really hard for me. Around 20 days of NC (during this time I had my exams so really took my mind off this situation) she texted me a lot asking how are you (I didnt reply to these) Then she called me & i picked up because she had a problem and was upset. We talked and she said she loves me, I said the same thing. But she was holding her decision to be friends. (I didn't ask her to get back together btw) Afterwards she text me a few days later saying she was crying, and feels like **** etc. She said please call me. I was too busy preparing for exams and this situation was hurting me, so I didnt reply. So now my exams are over and feel like I done the wrong thing ... I'm almost a month into NC. I want to talk to her. I have the fear I'm pushing her away. What do I do? Should I talk to her. Text? Call? I dont know :S Help plz ...
Confused_Soul_23 Posted June 20, 2013 Posted June 20, 2013 It seems like she is reaching out to you but she doesn't have the bottle to ask you directly. I would give her a call and say that you are sorry you have not been in touch sooner but you have a lot going on with exams etc. Ask her if she is ok and see how the conversation goes. If it goes well ask her casually if she wants to go for a drink and talk at some point. Try not to talk about the relationship and just treat it as a first date.
theonlyjuan Posted June 22, 2013 Posted June 22, 2013 It's got to be all about yourself! If you had the time you would have helped her.
StrongLass Posted June 22, 2013 Posted June 22, 2013 Basically to make my situation easier to understand ... My GF of 2 years and I broke up a month ago (Long Distance Relationship and we're both 18) .. and this was due to communication issues and generally the fact that Long distance got to us both, because we would be upset more etc. She wanted to be friends still, something I didn't really want because I love her a lot and it would just be really hard for me. Around 20 days of NC (during this time I had my exams so really took my mind off this situation) she texted me a lot asking how are you (I didnt reply to these) Then she called me & i picked up because she had a problem and was upset. We talked and she said she loves me, I said the same thing. But she was holding her decision to be friends. (I didn't ask her to get back together btw) Afterwards she text me a few days later saying she was crying, and feels like **** etc. She said please call me. I was too busy preparing for exams and this situation was hurting me, so I didnt reply. So now my exams are over and feel like I done the wrong thing ... I'm almost a month into NC. I want to talk to her. I have the fear I'm pushing her away. What do I do? Should I talk to her. Text? Call? I dont know .. Help plz ... Hopefully that helps clarify the situation a bit for you. If you still want to be more than friends DON'T contact her, wait for her to reach out for you. Focus on improving yourself. 1
JustAReformedGirl Posted June 22, 2013 Posted June 22, 2013 What with exams going on at the time, I imagine it was very difficult focusing on your schooling, with all that emotional upheaval going on. Now that they're done, you can take time to focus on your needs. If your ex doesn't want to get back together, but wants to be friends-a step you are not ready to take, and maybe you never will be-then, as hard as it may be, you might need to cut contact again. If need me, explain to her why you're cutting contact, and make sure she understands you're not doing it to be cruel but rather, to give yourself time to heal. if you can't go full NC, try LC, instead. Set terms; if right now causes you too much pain to talk about certain things, request from her that she refrains from speaking of those things. If you go LC, try to keep the conversations casual. Aside from that, the only way I'd advise giving her more is if she decides she wants to be with you again-and only if that's what you desire, as well.
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