scorpio1978 Posted June 20, 2013 Posted June 20, 2013 Yep, this is now the THIRD guy I have dated who has moved on to marry the girl right after me. We dated a year ago. I am going to start a service. For all those who want to get married, date me first and you are sure to be one step closer to finding your soul mate. Feeling a tad sorry for myself right now. What...the...HELL?! 2
Author scorpio1978 Posted June 20, 2013 Author Posted June 20, 2013 I have seen that movie, but I recall in the end, he gets the girl. Of course he does! Hollywood. I am fine, not depressed about it, just feeling a little sorry for myself and wondering if it's bad karma or something. I am 34. When will it be my turn. Cripes!
BustedUpInside Posted June 20, 2013 Posted June 20, 2013 He gets a girl, who because it is Hollywood, turns out to be the one. That could still be you. He goes through like 15 girls before meeting Jessica Alba. 1
pasteurization Posted June 20, 2013 Posted June 20, 2013 I'll marry you Scorpio. For the lasagna if nothing else...
Author scorpio1978 Posted June 20, 2013 Author Posted June 20, 2013 Awwww....Thanks! It's all about the sauce. You need fresh ingredients and simmer it for a few hours and add fennel seed. Homemade noodles helps too. Haha!
HopelessRomantick Posted June 20, 2013 Posted June 20, 2013 Scorpio, your time will come. They say when you stop looking love finds you. I was married for 20, now divorced and single wondering if I will be alone for the remainder of my life. I've decided to worry about myself, have fun and let the Universe do it's magic. 2
BustedUpInside Posted June 20, 2013 Posted June 20, 2013 Awwww....Thanks! It's all about the sauce. You need fresh ingredients and simmer it for a few hours and add fennel seed. Homemade noodles helps too. Haha! If you make homemade garlic bread to go with it, then I will put myself on the potential wife list too.
Author scorpio1978 Posted June 20, 2013 Author Posted June 20, 2013 If you make homemade garlic bread to go with it, then I will put myself on the potential wife list too. Done! Haha!
Author scorpio1978 Posted June 20, 2013 Author Posted June 20, 2013 Scorpio, your time will come. They say when you stop looking love finds you. I was married for 20, now divorced and single wondering if I will be alone for the remainder of my life. I've decided to worry about myself, have fun and let the Universe do it's magic. Thank you. I appreciate that. Let the universe do its magic is what I was thinking today before I got this news. Funny thing, is that I went to a fancy function with this guy in a designer gown a while ago, looking and feeling like a million bucks. When dinner was being served, I kindly informed him of this and his reply was, as he knocked back shots with his friends was "Honey, my hair is perfect and I am being awesome right now with my friends". Hahaaa! I am sorry, "what?!" I can't make this up. Yeah. We broke up the next day. He is no prize in my book, but there is somebody for every body. The news that someone took him off the market (or put other women out of their potential misery) isn't the point. It's just aggravating because I want nothing more than to have a life with a partner that I can dote on and love. I have everything else in my life exactly where it needs to be. Advanced degree, honorable profession, money, looks (I have bad days too), but I just cannot get right in the love department. Something I am working on, but damn its hard. Maybe I needed this. Needed to get knocked down a little more so that I am not so hopeful and trusting and therefore not so crushed when things don't work out. Less expectations and less pressure. Finger crossed. I got this!! 1
Author scorpio1978 Posted June 20, 2013 Author Posted June 20, 2013 Scorpio, your time will come. They say when you stop looking love finds you. I was married for 20, now divorced and single wondering if I will be alone for the remainder of my life. I've decided to worry about myself, have fun and let the Universe do it's magic. Know what else? My nine year old nephew, handsome devil that he is, told me 3 years ago when I was in a funk "You shouldn't have to look for love. love should find you". That kid is a genius! 4
aloneinaz Posted June 20, 2013 Posted June 20, 2013 Yep, this is now the THIRD guy I have dated who has moved on to marry the girl right after me. We dated a year ago. I am going to start a service. For all those who want to get married, date me first and you are sure to be one step closer to finding your soul mate. Feeling a tad sorry for myself right now. What...the...HELL?! Sorry for you to have to go thru this. I'm curious, did any of these guys give you clues as to why the relationship didn't work? Anything you feel you need to work on or tweak? I know thru my last relationship, she pointed things out that she felt I could change to make her happier and I of course shared some things w/her. While I'll go into the grave saying the 80-90% of our issues where on her, I did learn the 10-20% of the issues I brought needed to be polished and adjusted. I'm working very hard on this now. I just got home from a hot date and was very proud that some of the adjustments I knew I need to make, I did. An example- I can be sarcastic at times and I need to stop that. My point being, we can always learn from a crappy situation in hopes to not repeat the same mistakes. My ex didn't change anything about her MASSIVE issues and she's going to simply repeat them again with each new guy that figures her out. 2
Author scorpio1978 Posted June 20, 2013 Author Posted June 20, 2013 Sorry for you to have to go thru this. I'm curious, did any of these guys give you clues as to why the relationship didn't work? Anything you feel you need to work on or tweak? I know thru my last relationship, she pointed things out that she felt I could change to make her happier and I of course shared some things w/her. While I'll go into the grave saying the 80-90% of our issues where on her, I did learn the 10-20% of the issues I brought needed to be polished and adjusted. I'm working very hard on this now. I just got home from a hot date and was very proud that some of the adjustments I knew I need to make, I did. An example- I can be sarcastic at times and I need to stop that. My point being, we can always learn from a crappy situation in hopes to not repeat the same mistakes. My ex didn't change anything about her MASSIVE issues and she's going to simply repeat them again with each new guy that figures her out. There is no real pattern between the three. I broke up with 2 and the one broke up with me. One relationship lasted several years and another just a few months. I chalk it up to just bad timing. But with any issues I have, and we all have them, I have taken a big step by talking to a professional about it to live better, examine what, if anything, I could do differently in situations, etc. After 20+ years of dating and a few close calls with potential marriages of my own, I am finally owning up to my faults and ways to fix them. Don't get me wrong, I still slip up, but it's getting better. I just find it ridiculous and almost comical the luck I have.
aloneinaz Posted June 20, 2013 Posted June 20, 2013 There is no real pattern between the three. I broke up with 2 and the one broke up with me. One relationship lasted several years and another just a few months. I chalk it up to just bad timing. But with any issues I have, and we all have them, I have taken a big step by talking to a professional about it to live better, examine what, if anything, I could do differently in situations, etc. After 20+ years of dating and a few close calls with potential marriages of my own, I am finally owning up to my faults and ways to fix them. Don't get me wrong, I still slip up, but it's getting better. I just find it ridiculous and almost comical the luck I have. I'm sorry. I know its probably frustrating for sure. I know the feeling. I divorced 5 years ago. I would have NEVER thought I would not be remarried after this time. I've probably gone out with 60-70 different girls over the past 5 years. My last relationship that ended almost three weeks ago, I thought had the potential to be "the one". Of course, after about 8-9 months in, she let her hair down and I saw the real her. This lead into all the break ups and drama. I'm asking myself now why I put up w/so much BS from her when i should have kicked her to the curb months ago. The sad fact is, I was too lazy to want to have to go thru all the dating BS again and was clinging to the hope that therapy would help her. Oh well.. At least I have had some good dates w/potential for more. Scorpio, our time will come!
hinatticus Posted June 20, 2013 Posted June 20, 2013 At least you have a sense of humor about it. That's huge!! If anything it's just chance and is bound to happen to a few if us. I've had a couple ex's marry their next in line. I actually didn't even think about it until reading your post. Thanks a lot!! 2
bluegreen Posted June 20, 2013 Posted June 20, 2013 It could be worse he could be selling his next load of BS to an 18 year old saw that and it made me
Leigh 87 Posted June 20, 2013 Posted June 20, 2013 It is DEFINATELY down to just bad luck! Since you have everything else going for you and I am sure you have a good enough personality to enough men to be interested initially. You deserved better than some of your exes, by the sounds of things.... When you think about it, it is actually hard to imagine coming across too many people, of the opposite sex, who you feel: chemistry with, love being around, have compatible values, do not lie or cheat, who falls IN love with you deeply when you feel the same way back, and who you will grow and change with in a way that does not break you apart. Seriously. To find the "click" with someone is much harder than simply being attractive and successful. Even to have that initial "spark" is hard, even for beautiful people to find. Something really special, that "it factor" is seemingly hard to find, regardless of WHO you are. To find that rare "click" from early on, and to also be compatible as life partners? Very rare. Not all that many marriages are between two people that are actually IN love. They wanted marriage and kids and a family. They settle for people they like a lot and can handle and who they share similar values with. To wait out and find the right person who they could fall madly in love with? They would rather not be single for long periods of time and, instead, settle for relationships that are good in theory, but lack the "in love" factor. Or they are IN love with the wrong person for them. Yet stay. Please continue with your refreshing attitude. It is good to see the comical side in the seemingly "bad" things in life. 1
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