lemonadekiwi Posted June 19, 2013 Posted June 19, 2013 (edited) me and my ex have mutual friends...and his friends still want to hang out with me, and so i have been. been stupidly hoping that because his friends still like me he'll think that he made a mistake. i have been clinging onto false hope because when we were together he was so passionate about me and now it's nothing... he broke up with me...and we tried to be 'friends', didnt work, we had an argument and i deleted him from fb and started no contact. not even 30 days in, he adds me on fb again and i accepted thinking maybe he wanted me in his life. he never messaged me. so why did he add me?? his friend invites him to the pub a few days later and i was unaware. i got all emotional seeing him...and chased after him when he left to ask to be 'friends' again and be on good terms...then i texted him after he got on the bus. cringe. but he agreed. still never contacted me afterwards. 2 days ago i messaged him on fb asking how he was... he replied a day later...just saying how he was doing well in his new job, didnt ask me how i was or anything, nothing. i replied saying that was good he was doing well...and nothing, i can see he read it because that fb shows 'seen' but he hasnt replied to ask how i am. he's ignored it. now i feel awful. just awful, pathetic. now been invited to a mutual friends bday in a couple of weeks, hes going. and i feel sick and embaressed. why add me on fb if he doesnt want to talk to me? i still cant get over him wanting me so badly to not bothered at all. i feel like i should be over this but im not. and now ive resorted to messaging him asking how he is when he dumped me?? i feel like ive lost all self worth. and i feel like nothing Edited June 19, 2013 by lemonadekiwi needed to add more
forgetmenot75 Posted June 19, 2013 Posted June 19, 2013 (edited) Regain your strength. Go NC. Stop writing him, and stop seeing him. He knows you're available for him, he knows you still love him, and he's just NOT INTERESTED ON YOU. Stop putting yourself in that situation where you wait a word from him. Move on. Find new friends, find a new love...He just doesn't care what you do at this moment. If you still want to be with him, or if you want to lose him, go NC at least for 6 weeks. Then, time will tell Edited June 19, 2013 by forgetmenot75
aloneinaz Posted June 19, 2013 Posted June 19, 2013 Agree with above. You're not going to get over him (cause he's already gotten over you) until you stay away from him and his friends. No contact is proven to work for that very reason. You're admitting you made some mistakes since he ended it. We all have! Learn from it and don't contact him again. Block him on Facebook and any other media as well. You will heal from this and find a new love, promise!
LovelyDaze Posted June 19, 2013 Posted June 19, 2013 The points made of NC are tedious but correct. It worked for me thanks to wonderful LS members from four years back. If you want to heal, you have to distance yourself from him. You just have to. That means, you have to remove yourself from being a friend on FB, you have to bow out kindly from hanging out at events that you're pretty sure he will be at, you definitely have to cease any other form of contact right now(IM, text, call, etc.) For your ex to add you then pretty much not deal with you on FB just screams "breadcrumbs." Your ex wants to keep you dangling on while he lives his life happy without you. Its cruel but most dumpers do this. Simply put, if it gives you an ache in your heart when you see or chat with him, then you are not ready to deal with him. Distance is the key.
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