Author intherealworld Posted June 19, 2013 Author Posted June 19, 2013 I was on Match. That's where I found my love. Anyway, the green profiles are paid, and the white ones are non-paid, right? As stated above, it's not all about looks. I have been winked and emailed by so many women, and although the pictures grab my attention, I look at the full profile. I'm NOT gonna consider a woman who never attended college. I'm NOT gonna consider a woman who has a short profile description. I'm NOT gonna consider a woman who is "separated" but not divorced. Lastly, most important to me, I would NOT consider a woman who has no kids. So basically all of my requirements have higher priority than physical attractiveness. Should I re-message with an unhidden profile or does that scream psycho/stalker lol
Author intherealworld Posted June 19, 2013 Author Posted June 19, 2013 Also might think she is trying to cheat Good point. Didn't think about that.
Author intherealworld Posted June 19, 2013 Author Posted June 19, 2013 I think you need to unhide your profile if you expect responses. If your profile is hidden, not only does it look shady, but they can only see your one picture (and it's smaller from what I have heard) and almost NOTHING else about you. Why would they want to reply when they know nothing about you? Yeah..really didn't think that one through lol...I don't know how Match works but that makes sense. Now the question is...do I re-message with an unhidden profile or just call it a wash...
SJC2008 Posted June 19, 2013 Posted June 19, 2013 Whatever you decide, I'd ditch OLD alltogether. Most men are there to get laid and most women there are either rebounding or have unrealistic expectations. I've gotten dates from women IRL who blow many of the women online who have ignored me out of the water. 1
NoMoreJerks Posted June 19, 2013 Posted June 19, 2013 Most men are there to get laid and most women there are either rebounding or have unrealistic expectations. I agree wholeheartedly with this statement, especially the first part.
Author intherealworld Posted June 19, 2013 Author Posted June 19, 2013 Whatever you decide, I'd ditch OLD alltogether. Most men are there to get laid and most women there are either rebounding or have unrealistic expectations. I've gotten dates from women IRL who blow many of the women online who have ignored me out of the water. Meh, pretty hard for me to believe this considering I met my previous bf of 6 months on there. Also am really good friends with another guy I met on there, we're going to a concert this weekend. I actually have a date from someone I met IRL tonight haha but idk, I've had success in the past from OLD..I think I'm pretty good at weeding out guys who are full of BS. And I'm not looking for a relationship right now, just looking to go on some dates & see what's out there. So I'm not too worried if a guy turns out to be full of sh*t
SuperGeek Posted June 19, 2013 Posted June 19, 2013 No apology necessary. This thread and even your RESPONSE BELOW is a great reminder on why ONLINE DATING SUCKS FOR MEN. Total waste of time. Good luck with your fishing expedition. LOL ok ok, I deserved that, but also I'm not going to apologize for how easy it (usually) is for attractive girls to get responses from guys on dating sites Oh the curse of the being female! If I were a guy I would prob hate OLD as well. But I always reach out to guys I'm interested in I don't sit back & wait for a cute one to come along. But maybe the guys I messaged just didn't think I was all that. Oh well.
Casablanca Posted June 19, 2013 Posted June 19, 2013 Whatever you decide, I'd ditch OLD alltogether. Most men are there to get laid and most women there are either rebounding or have unrealistic expectations. I've gotten dates from women IRL who blow many of the women online who have ignored me out of the water. I've met more desperate rebounding women in real life than online and there are plenty of guys in real life who are just there to get laid...no different than going to party or bar and trying to meet someone...
irc333 Posted June 19, 2013 Posted June 19, 2013 Serves you right for being a chicken and "hiding out" on a site where men are paying members. This is good to know though, makes me want to avoid Match.com altogether. Why pay good money only to have the women ignore you through a filtering system that Match.com allows women to use? Recently signed up for Match, and usually when I do OLD I hide my profile from searches & such because I'd prefer to email people I'm interested in first without having to sift through 50 million unwanted emails in my inbox. Anyway, I read that I could still contact members with a hidden profile but it would show just my name & default picture. Last night, maybe around 5pm, I sent out 7 different emails to cute guys, and have heard NOTHING back! I made sure to tell them that I hid my profile so there wouldn't be any confusion if they tried to look at it. I know most of them it said they hadn't been online in days-weeks, but my top 2 cuties I messaged said they were "online now" so they def got my message. Not to sound shallow, but I consider myself very attractive, and usually on OKC and the like I get responses back within the hour. I would think most guys would be elated to have an attractive girl reach out to them first. What gives?!!
Author intherealworld Posted June 19, 2013 Author Posted June 19, 2013 I've met more desperate rebounding women in real life than online and there are plenty of guys in real life who are just there to get laid...no different than going to party or bar and trying to meet someone... Exactly! All of the guys I went on dates with from OKC before meeting my ex bf were legitly seeking a relationship whereas every guy I had met and 'dated' in real life wanted nothing more than a booty call...just sayin....
Author intherealworld Posted June 19, 2013 Author Posted June 19, 2013 Serves you right for being a chicken and "hiding out" on a site where men are paying members. This is good to know though, makes me want to avoid Match.com altogether. Why pay good money only to have the women ignore you through a filtering system that Match.com allows women to use? I wasn't ignoring anyone I was reaching out to them!! I've un-hid my profile now...should I try to message them again or will they see that as psycho lol
Author intherealworld Posted June 19, 2013 Author Posted June 19, 2013 My goodness...the Bitter Brigade has taken over your thread, haven't they? I'm not familiar with Match so I don't even know if people can reply to a paid account if that person writes them first. Look into your options to see if you can enable free members to reply to you (if that's even applicable). I totally get what you're saying and it's true - most guys whine and cry that NO ONE will reply to them, much less reach out and talk to them first. You're not being "arrogant" - you're actually pretty correct that most guys should feel somewhat flattered that an attractive woman wrote to them on a dating site because it doesn't happen for most guys. Hell, you see the whining in this thread ALONE so that pretty much proves it. Try changing your preferences and/or unhide your profile and try again. Can't hurt. Haha thank you for understanding!! My thoughts exactly! I want to re-message these guys but not sure what to say given I don't want to look like a stalker/psycho...hmmm....
SJC2008 Posted June 19, 2013 Posted June 19, 2013 Meh, pretty hard for me to believe this considering I met my previous bf of 6 months on there. Also am really good friends with another guy I met on there, we're going to a concert this weekend. I actually have a date from someone I met IRL tonight haha but idk, I've had success in the past from OLD..I think I'm pretty good at weeding out guys who are full of BS. And I'm not looking for a relationship right now, just looking to go on some dates & see what's out there. So I'm not too worried if a guy turns out to be full of sh*t You don't have to beleive it and shouldn't as your experience has been better. TBS your good experience is more of an exception than the norm for both genders.
Anela Posted June 19, 2013 Posted June 19, 2013 Try HerWay.com. You email the men if you like the look and/or sound of them. You get to choose who can see your profile, too.
SJC2008 Posted June 19, 2013 Posted June 19, 2013 I've met more desperate rebounding women in real life than online and there are plenty of guys in real life who are just there to get laid...no different than going to party or bar and trying to meet someone... I agree with you on the latter but why does an OLD vs. IRL argument always have to happen when someone makes a comment about OLD?
Author intherealworld Posted June 19, 2013 Author Posted June 19, 2013 Ugh someone tell me if its worth it to re-message these guys or not?? Idk how to say " sorry I was so shady before but now I un hid my profile & I still think youre cute & want to talk to you" in an eloquent manner lol. & I don't want to come off desperate/ psychotic...
Anela Posted June 20, 2013 Posted June 20, 2013 Ugh someone tell me if its worth it to re-message these guys or not?? Idk how to say " sorry I was so shady before but now I un hid my profile & I still think youre cute & want to talk to you" in an eloquent manner lol. & I don't want to come off desperate/ psychotic... Don't message them again.
Anela Posted June 20, 2013 Posted June 20, 2013 all your emails went to the cute guys. none went to the socially awkward nerds who aren't so cute. And your messages would go to whom...? She emailed those she found cute. I can tell you that women I know haven't always liked guys I thought were cute - and vice versa.
Author intherealworld Posted June 20, 2013 Author Posted June 20, 2013 all your emails went to the cute guys. none went to the socially awkward nerds who aren't so cute. lets go through it. these top tier cute guys are desired by everybody. they get to be very picky. you may be very good, but someone else is even better in their eyes. i'm not saying email less attractive options, but i'm saying this is what happens. They were cute to me but def not " top tier." I prefer guys who aren't jacked, tan, & are stereotypically "hot"
Author intherealworld Posted June 20, 2013 Author Posted June 20, 2013 good observation. she just emailed seven guys, probably top tier guys who are in great demand. she wont need to send out 200 like we do, but she'll need to keep sending them out until she gets a favorable response. for each girl on there, there's probably two guys, so she has a built in advantage. edit: missed the part that she has a hidden profile. even if a guy likes her message and picture, he's going to have reservations replying. Should I re-message now that my profile is unhidden...or wink or something at least? I paid $ for this dammit lol I know I messed up messaging people w a hidden profile but maybe it's still salvageable??
Estate Posted June 20, 2013 Posted June 20, 2013 Should I re-message now that my profile is unbidden...or wink or something at least? I paid $ for this dammit lol I know I messed up messaging people w a hidden profile but maybe it's still salvageable?? Online dating isn't easy you know. It's not your god given right that every guy who you message has to want to date you. Afterall, you're being pretty picky yourself with this hidden profile nonsense. 1
Author intherealworld Posted June 20, 2013 Author Posted June 20, 2013 Online dating isn't easy you know. It's not your god given right that every guy who you message has to want to date you. Afterall, you're being pretty picky yourself with this hidden profile nonsense. I wasn't trying to be picky I honestly just saw 2 people on there that I know would be really awkward if they saw I had a profile on there lol. But guess I'll have to suck it up or go on a diff site
SJC2008 Posted June 20, 2013 Posted June 20, 2013 Should I re-message now that my profile is unhidden...or wink or something at least? I paid $ for this dammit lol I know I messed up messaging people w a hidden profile but maybe it's still salvageable?? Don't message them, change your profile pic and view their profiles again. As you know, the people that view you show up in order of most recent view. They'll see you and click on your profile and check it out. Sure they'll realise it's you when they see the pic associated with your email but they'll at least know who you are and if yall have anything in common. I think this gives you your best chance. 2
SuperGeek Posted June 20, 2013 Posted June 20, 2013 I'd rather have my teeth filed down without novacain than to spend even 5 minutes emailing egotistical girls (because they aren't real women) who think they are all that and a bag of chips. The OP clearly thinks she's the hottest girl on the planet and that alone disqualifies her from even the most level headed guys here who don't want to deal with that drama. Hell after five minutes of talking to her the only thing I'd even consider is a one night stand, MAYBE. Dating sites are for game players and women who constantly need their ego stroked 24/7. This is why guys evolve to a point of avoiding bitchy hot women. We don't want to put up with your drama and your hollier than thou attitudes. It's just not worth it. Trust me, the attitude REALLY has to be bad for it to not be worth it and it usually is. This post is over. I'll let you get back to rejecting guys on dating sites. My goodness...the Bitter Brigade has taken over your thread, haven't they? I'm not familiar with Match so I don't even know if people can reply to a paid account if that person writes them first. Look into your options to see if you can enable free members to reply to you (if that's even applicable). I totally get what you're saying and it's true - most guys whine and cry that NO ONE will reply to them, much less reach out and talk to them first. You're not being "arrogant" - you're actually pretty correct that most guys should feel somewhat flattered that an attractive woman wrote to them on a dating site because it doesn't happen for most guys. Hell, you see the whining in this thread ALONE so that pretty much proves it. Try changing your preferences and/or unhide your profile and try again. Can't hurt.
shexy Posted June 20, 2013 Posted June 20, 2013 Here's a really crafty trick and fact that paid online dating sites don't want you to know. Over 93% of profiles you see are dead air. Meaning-- they've either been inactive, or they're not paid accounts so they can't see your message anyway. Why You Should Never Pay For Online Dating « OkTrends I signed up for match for a month and never had responses to anything I sent out. They also gave me really crappy matches for me and I never responded to anything anyone sent me. Huge waste of time. So true! If I ever do OLD again, I'll stick with the free sites. I paid for eharmony once and it was a gigantic rip off.
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