theedge Posted October 13, 2004 Posted October 13, 2004 Hey all.... Im feeling a bit bummed. This is another part to my previous post about a girl I just started dating. We have been seeing each other for about 1 month now and we both didn't want to rush anything physical. The time we spent together was great, we got along very well. Things got hot and heavy and I went a bit further then I had previous she told me she didn't feel comfortable so I stopped. The next night the same thing happened, but I asked her permission before doing it and she agreed.. Turn to next morning, things went down hill. She had no affection, didn't care if I was there or not, and wanted to avoid anything to do with me getting close. It doesn't take a genius to figure out she was upset about the whole ordeal. I brought it up and had "It happened what can you do about it?" Said back to me. From there it was dropped and I can only say it was an uncomfortable 2 days. In general I am the type to analyse things to death and get all stressed about them. She came online the same night and I really brought up the subject. I apologised even though it wasn't fully my fault. She finally opened up about it and cleared the air. Thats when she told me we had to cool it for a bit, I figured that was her way of saying she didn't want to date anymore. She told me it wasn't that and we just need to take things slow. I figured as long as we can work on it I am ok with that. At this point she said she had to go to bed. We have a usual way of saying good night. She started with hers and then even before I could reply with good night as I usually would she had already disconnected. Unusual to say the least so I stressed it. This morning I saw her name pop up and she never comes on during the morning. I sent her a message and she replied back saying she was on for second to e-mail someone. We talked for 3 minutes and then she said "Gotta go" Again I was going through our usual good-bye/good night. We use emoticons, well I said have a good day and what not and got "u2" Back with no emoticons. Lol she didn't even have the ability to write the words out. The glimmer of hope that I saw is that she does still want to hang out. Both of us sort of have plans this weekend but we still are making plans to meet up. Im spending the night with her Friday and she is spending the night with me Saturday. She said its still depending on her schedule, for me that means she is seriously considering bailing though. At this point with the full 180 and trying communication its all I can do. I am also worried that this is going to hurt me as well. I know she has told me she has a worry about men using her for sex, so it could just be untill she trusts me again. I also have the worry of me getting hurt in this though. I to a degree am like her when I am worried about being hurt , I shut off all emotions. I am trying not to do that or we will be doomed the best I can do is deal with it. So what do you think? Im just flip flopping about the whole idea. Writting this at least helps me get some thoughts together on the pros and cons of whats happening. All I can say is I really do like her, and hope its a temp situation. Part of me is dreading seeing her this weekend and having the same awkwardness. Does anyone have any ideas to help me? Thank you all for your opinions!
Papillon Posted October 13, 2004 Posted October 13, 2004 She has obvious issues with her sexuality. Don't beat yourself up about it - you did get her permission, and she did participate of her own free will. She'll get used to the idea. Just relax and be her friend.
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