Cutiepie1976 Posted June 14, 2013 Posted June 14, 2013 The rationale is pretty simple, and basically the same forwarded in these forums by women who discover behaviors from their boyfriends, or even spouses, while they are dating which are shocking to them: The difference in those cases (and there is an active thread on this right now) is the behaviors occurred after the relationship started, not before. Even the OP admits that his GF didn't cheat once the relationship started. We are reading his words, not making up stuff as you seem to suggest. There was no relationship until the eighth date according to the OP's own posts. Can the OP be upset upon hearing this? Emotions are illogical, so of course he may. Can he hold it against her? That would be entirely unreasonable, especially in light of the fact that he was no altar boy on their seventh date. In fact, he went further than they did. His brother is right. The OP cannot have one standard for himself and another for his girlfriend. It's ridiculous. Neither should you.
Cutiepie1976 Posted June 14, 2013 Posted June 14, 2013 I knew she was seeing other guys because she used to only see me once a week. I saw her Facebook and one of the guys always tag her for pics. I asked her what's her status with the other guys, she said she's just dating for now. Eventually she and I really clicked,band she made herself exclusively to me. I didn't ask cuz i was assumption they were just taking her out for dinner and movie. By the way I m28, she's 25, both Asian. Sorry you're upset about this. Two pieces of advice: You are free to ask for exclusivity whenever you want. For whatever reason, that happened on your eighth date or two months into dating.Since you are easily upset by these things, don't ask/don't tell would be a good policy for you.
stillafool Posted June 14, 2013 Posted June 14, 2013 Did she also go down on you while she was dating the other guys? If so and she had picked one of them they would be upset with you. Just forget it or see someone else.
Drseussgrrl Posted June 14, 2013 Posted June 14, 2013 I'll never understand why people want to know these things. See? Now you know, and you're playing those mind movies over and over in your head. And for what? She didn't do anything dishonest. 2
therhythm Posted June 14, 2013 Posted June 14, 2013 I'll never understand why people want to know these things. See? Now you know, and you're playing those mind movies over and over in your head. And for what? She didn't do anything dishonest. That is exactly my point... but you have expressed far better than I did You can unknown things....so if you ask something prepare to confront the truth... the problem is that the poor lady has got in trouble just for being honest. 1
sillyanswer Posted June 14, 2013 Posted June 14, 2013 She felt I was the one what do you guys think? Dude, she picked you. 1
Author thinkman Posted June 15, 2013 Author Posted June 15, 2013 Did she swallow? I find it reckless she had oral sex with the other men, the chances of having STDs from fluid contact is higher than just sleeping with other people using protection. Also, her telling you this just makes her comes across as easy. I don't object to multi-dating but I do oppose to sleeping around with so many partners around all at once. I mean, she would've even put your health at risk had she contracted something from those other men. Also has she gotten a test? I guess if you are a forgiving person, you can overlook this fault of hers. But I think it's always going to follow you around because men in general are possessive and it's horrible to have to think you shared your girlfriend with someone else. I am pretty sure she swallowed, because she used to say how guy's have different taste due to the food they eat. Anyway, we both tested, so we are good in this regard.
Titania22 Posted June 15, 2013 Posted June 15, 2013 I am pretty sure she swallowed, because she used to say how guy's have different taste due to the food they eat. Anyway, we both tested, so we are good in this regard. You can taste things without swallowing them. The taste buds are in the mouth.
Author thinkman Posted June 15, 2013 Author Posted June 15, 2013 The rationale is pretty simple, and basically the same forwarded in these forums by women who discover behaviors from their boyfriends, or even spouses, while they are dating which are shocking to them: The OP was confronted with graphic evidence of sexual activity with other men which occurred while they were dating. He feels about it as he does. He has choices about how to process those feelings and make decisions based upon them and that process. OP, did you have any discussions about sexual activity prior to your seventh date? Did you ever discuss dating exclusively? If yes, what were the details? I asked her indirectly when we first started dating. I asked what's she looking for, and she said he's just taking the time to make sure the next person she falls in love with is a potential marriage partner. She told me she's also go on dates with two other guys, and want to take the time to get to know someone. I assumed she was just taking her time and just out for dinner and movies. I did date other girls,but the most intimate thing I do was just kissing. I guess I m a little naive....
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