Javabear Posted June 13, 2013 Posted June 13, 2013 I went through a horrible breakup 9 months ago and I know that I'm not really ready for anything serious, but I do have a crush on a guy that I work with. Unfortunately, we work at school and the year is over and we're both graduating so I probably won't see him ever again. However, I wrote him a letter just telling him that I thought he was really cool and I wished him well for the future. We've been writing back and forth for the last four days. We're both really into literature and writing and we've been having a really great conversation about upcoming writing projects. The problem is, he's really hard to read and I can't tell if he's into me or not. We used to talk all the time at work, but he's a very friendly person and talks to anyone. I'm so confused and it's been 3 years since I've done this (I was with my ex for the last 3 years) so I need help. I don't know when he's moving home after graduation, but I was thinking of asking him to have coffee with me. I'm just nervous! Is it weird for a girl to make the first move? But really, what have I got to lose? I just don't know if I can face any potential rejection right now since I know I'm still in the process of healing from my breakup. Any advice out there?
JuneJulySeptember Posted June 13, 2013 Posted June 13, 2013 I understand. Rejection is really hard. Of course, I'm a guy so anytime I talk about rejection hurting me, people tell me to suck it up and stop being a p@ssy, or just ignore me altogether. But anyway. I'm the MASTER of rejection, and I'll put it this way. It always hurts a lot more when you have more invested in the person. Rejection hardly ever stings or lasts too much when I don't know the person that well. In your case, maybe gauge how much you feel for him, and whether that is worth the hurt it will cause.
Tinie Posted June 13, 2013 Posted June 13, 2013 I say you have nothing to lose. I have asked guys to go with me for coffee. Worst case scenario: you make a friend. Don't emotionally invest yet and you won't be in a position where you'll get hurt. It's not something that will make you look weird- it's too casual a request, so don't worry.
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