wmrjw82 Posted June 13, 2013 Posted June 13, 2013 Been broken up for about 3 weeks now. Its still real raw. Haven't even reached NC (most we've gone is about 3 days)... she's an alcoholic who isn't completely over her ex. Sad thing is, i looked past it all because I fell hard for her. Then she dumped me. Why you ask? I'm codependent. I told her I needed my golf clubs, but she could leave them outside my door as I would be out. (That was supposed to be this friday)... she txt'd me back if it would be okay if she brought them by Sunday. I said sure. We're in a stage right now where we're pretending everything is good between us and we're "remaining friends" but i'm deeply hurt. Not trying to show her anything as far as emotions go. Too much power for her and it makes me feel worse. My question is... I know seeing her on Sunday will cause me deep pain and set me back. When she calls or txts on Sunday should I just tell her to leave it next to my door? Either way I feel like if I dont show up when she drops them off, or if I see her and we exchange things she'll have the power. I can try to act it off, but inside after she goes it will hurt. I know it. Do I see her Sunday or no? Thoughts?
flitzanu Posted June 13, 2013 Posted June 13, 2013 Been broken up for about 3 weeks now. Its still real raw. Haven't even reached NC (most we've gone is about 3 days)... she's an alcoholic who isn't completely over her ex. Sad thing is, i looked past it all because I fell hard for her. Then she dumped me. Why you ask? I'm codependent. I told her I needed my golf clubs, but she could leave them outside my door as I would be out. (That was supposed to be this friday)... she txt'd me back if it would be okay if she brought them by Sunday. I said sure. We're in a stage right now where we're pretending everything is good between us and we're "remaining friends" but i'm deeply hurt. Not trying to show her anything as far as emotions go. Too much power for her and it makes me feel worse. My question is... I know seeing her on Sunday will cause me deep pain and set me back. When she calls or txts on Sunday should I just tell her to leave it next to my door? Either way I feel like if I dont show up when she drops them off, or if I see her and we exchange things she'll have the power. I can try to act it off, but inside after she goes it will hurt. I know it. Do I see her Sunday or no? Thoughts? first thing, she already has the power. she isn't "gaining" it by dropping off your things. she dumped you, that's it, you're never going to gain any ground or "one up" her. secondly, NC is not a "we" thing, it's a "you" thing. being friends with her is obviously just torture for you, so stop talking to her, you'll heal faster.
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