wideawake0310 Posted June 12, 2013 Posted June 12, 2013 Did you ever give back the love letters and things that your ex gave to you? My ex is picking up his clothes at my house tomorrow and I'm planning to give back the love letters and a journal (few pages) that I wrote about him long time ago. He gave me some few things at my house too. He really broke up with me really cold, and I just don't want anything at my house to remind me of him, although it is hard to let go since I kept them for more than 2 years. But this way, I feel that he will see that I am going over him and for me to finally move on.
The Situation Posted June 12, 2013 Posted June 12, 2013 When the time is right, you'll throw them away. It took me a year and a half to chuck all of my ex's stuff away. At that point I was finally ready to move on (shame I lost someone a million times better in the process). Don't give them back unless you want to hurt him. But take the moral ground and keep them until you're ready to let go. 3
SimonSerenade Posted June 12, 2013 Posted June 12, 2013 It's hard to say, I only got one love letter from my ex and most of I was blaming me for stuff lol but it's still something special I geuss, I read it over and over, cried one last time and threw it away, she bought me a teddy which has since been put in storage until I can bunt myself to throw it away and other than that I still have a ps3 and vita that she bought me which I'm debating on selling at some point and putting away for a ps4, having to see them 24/7 is hard, let alone using them for a purpose, everything reminds me of her. I can relate on the cold front, she ended it over a text and had nothing meaningful to say to me, ever since she's been very cold and harsh towards me for no reason, my advice to you, anything you have remaining of him, get rid of it because most likely he probably doesn't care or he'll bottle it up and never show it, burn all evidence of the past!. 1
BrokenHeartedSavior Posted June 12, 2013 Posted June 12, 2013 (edited) Shove the damn things in an envelope, seal it, and SHRED THEM when you're ready! Do NOT read them over and over. Pointless. As someone just over a year post BU (she has LONG moved on) I have kept EXACTLY ONE PHOTO of us, which has been sealed, and stored away. When the time is right, i'll burn/shred it, never having unsealed it. Do NOT give them back, he won't care and will toss them. They mean much more to you than they do to him. Edited June 12, 2013 by BrokenHeartedSavior Sp 1
KatZee Posted June 12, 2013 Posted June 12, 2013 When my ex dumped me I packed all his crap up in a black garbage bag to give back to him. Along with his clothes, were two scrapbooks I had made with all our pictures, and I tossed all the cards he ever wrote me, and a letter in along with the photo albums. I wanted nothing to do with any of that crap he gave me. 3
Giha Posted June 12, 2013 Posted June 12, 2013 Put them in a box and hide them (personally I asked someone to put it somewhere I can't find them), or just throw them away. Don't give them back. Just don't mess with this stuff...don't even look at them 2
theonlyjuan Posted June 12, 2013 Posted June 12, 2013 Don't give them back I have a box full of stuff i kept from dates, days out etc I've hid it. Hopefully I find it one day when I have completely forgotten about it all. Then I can finally get rid of it 2
forgetmenot75 Posted June 12, 2013 Posted June 12, 2013 No, don't give them back. store them in the garage and forget about them. You can think about this in the future. As for the journal, NO, don't give it to him. Don't give him anything more. Keep it for yourself. 2
Author wideawake0310 Posted June 13, 2013 Author Posted June 13, 2013 I decided not to give them back. Although its hard to let go, those were part of our special time together and I do cherish them. But like what you guys said, I will store them where I won't see them everyday. And hopefully one day, I will have the courage to throw them away. If I give them back to him, you guys were right, he might just toss them since it really seemed like it mattered to me more than it mattered to him. It's pretty hard and I feel such a deep sadness, especially tomorrow I know he will come and pick up his things. But like what my other friend told me, start the NC and time to move on. You will never know that maybe someday, when things cool down, maybe we will talk again. I don't know if I'm making sense right now. It's hard to get rejected just because I am not the same color and religion that he is.
BC1980 Posted June 13, 2013 Posted June 13, 2013 I gave everything back really quickly. He's the type who wanted to keep the memories, so I gave him everything. I deleted all pics from my phone also. It really helps you to emotionally detach and come to grips with reality. It's hard enough to accept it without pictures and letters in your possession. Why make it harder? Religion is often a deal breaker in relationships and can get even worse after you are married. More issues start to come up when people are different religions.
Author wideawake0310 Posted June 13, 2013 Author Posted June 13, 2013 He's Muslim and I'm catholic but I never thought that would be an issue especially he's not religious. When I asked him if we have a future, he then told Me no because he wants to marry a Turkish girl. I was shocked. So why go out with me then? That's something that I still can't accept and really hurt my feelings and my self esteem
flitzanu Posted June 13, 2013 Posted June 13, 2013 Did you ever give back the love letters and things that your ex gave to you? My ex is picking up his clothes at my house tomorrow and I'm planning to give back the love letters and a journal (few pages) that I wrote about him long time ago. He gave me some few things at my house too. He really broke up with me really cold, and I just don't want anything at my house to remind me of him, although it is hard to let go since I kept them for more than 2 years. But this way, I feel that he will see that I am going over him and for me to finally move on. maybe if you're 15 and in junior high you should give them back. if you don't want to remember him, throw them away. you'll feel better knowing that you had control over removing them from your life.
BrokenHeartedSavior Posted June 13, 2013 Posted June 13, 2013 (edited) He's Muslim and I'm catholic but I never thought that would be an issue especially he's not religious. When I asked him if we have a future, he then told Me no because he wants to marry a Turkish girl. I was shocked. So why go out with me then? That's something that I still can't accept and really hurt my feelings and my self esteem UGH!!! Religion? Kills folks dead! That in itself makes him a LOSER. sorry religious people. This ain't church. Let him be who he is. PERIOD. You can't fix stupididity. Nothing more to say. Good luck, Edited June 13, 2013 by BrokenHeartedSavior
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