The art of meeting someone for the first time ( meh)

[Ed the 3rd]

So yeah date this week and while I have the utmost confidence I will come off as totally irresistible, interesting and charming Adonis can I get some advice from anyone about meeting someone from an OLD site? I've met up for normal dates and gone on drunken escapades before but I've never quite done anything like this.

 

I'm not going to set myself on fire the second there's an awkward silence but some tips on making things the least awkward it can be would help thanks

 

PS: forgive the title apparently the word "help" is forbidden in these parts :/

[Treasa]

Just try to be relaxed. It's just a date, not the rest of your life. Think of it as getting to know someone knew. Ask her questions about herself, tell funny little stories about your life if you can pivot in that direction, listen to what she says, smile, etc.

[hudson701]

I'm about to do the exact same thing tomorrow. I really hope it's not a scam. We've only exchanged 3 messages before she invited me out and offered her number. Never had someone so forward before.

 

Advice also welcomed.

[Ed the 3rd]

I'm about to do the exact same thing tomorrow. I really hope it's not a scam. We've only exchanged 3 messages before she invited me out and offered her number. Never had someone so forward before.

 

Advice also welcomed.

That is very forward indeed. Good luck hopefully it isn't some trickery.

[spiderowl]

Start out with a smile and a warm, friendly greeting.

 

Share decisions like where to sit, whether to just drink or eat as well.

 

Start off by buying the first drink and be generous. A decent woman will not take advantage of you but will notice if you seem mean-spirited.

 

Don't suggest doing anything that involves her being in an isolated place with you on a first date, unless she seems entirely happy with it. Keep to public places.

 

Ask her about herself but don't say 'tell me about yourself' as that's really annoying and seems lazy. Tell her about yourself and what you liked about her - hopefully she will respond likewise.

 

If she seems as if she doesn't feel the 'chemistry' with you, continue to be polite, respectful and keep it light-hearted. Things can change during a date but not always. A guy that becomes sullen or seems negative or cynical quickly becomes offputting.

 

If you are attracted to her, say something nice to her about your attraction, but keep the 'sexy' and 'body' comments out of it.

 

See what common ground you can find - do you both like walking, for example? Listen to her interests and tell her a bit about yours. You may find you enjoy similar things or that you'll hate spending time with each other. Either way you've learned something.

 

If you want to see her again, sound her out before the end of the date. Part with a warm hug, if she's happy with that. Follow up with a text or phone call soon afterwards to make sure she got home OK (and give you chance to show you're a gent). If you like her, take the risk of asking her out again, she can only say no and at least you tried.

[Ed the 3rd]

Solid advice but I've been dealt a unique hand in that she wants to take a walk someone that's probably quite isolated near where we are meeting up. This will involve quite a bit of talking. Its not quite the same as going for a drink (where the drink will help ease off the awkwardness) or lunch.

 

I know there really isn't much I can do in this situation other then tell awkwardness to get lost every time it rears its head. Still if anyone has any other handy advice it would be appreciated.

 

I'm actually stuck for topics online now as constantly asking her how her day was bores me let alone her and I don't want to use up any potential conversation topics before we meet.

[CulturallyConfused]

Solid advice but I've been dealt a unique hand in that she wants to take a walk someone that's probably quite isolated near where we are meeting up. This will involve quite a bit of talking. Its not quite the same as going for a drink (where the drink will help ease off the awkwardness) or lunch.

 

I know there really isn't much I can do in this situation other then tell awkwardness to get lost every time it rears its head. Still if anyone has any other handy advice it would be appreciated.

 

I'm actually stuck for topics online now as constantly asking her how her day was bores me let alone her and I don't want to use up any potential conversation topics before we meet.

 

uh oh the isolated part doesn't sound that good to me. I'd give it a change of plans, ditch the walk and meet in a public place.

[Ed the 3rd]

We are "meeting" in a public place. The walk comes afterwards.

 

But it was her idea and its something we are both comfortable with so I didn't turn it down. Just that's a lot of time for conversation.

[hudson701]

Just got back. 6 hour date. Wasn't assassinated.

[Ed the 3rd]

Just got back. Very awkward at first but I kept my cool and didn't dose myself in gasoline. Once we got past that barrier it went rather well. She is still far to good to be true