Dancegirl1 Posted June 11, 2013 Posted June 11, 2013 We dated for 15 months and he's 17 and I'm 18. He wanted to break up because he said he didn't want to have a relationship anymore. He said he wasn't ready/mature for one. He said he probably won't be ready until college. He was always busy and couldn't give me what I needed. I fell for a boy when I need a man. :/ He treated me poorly while I went above and beyond for him. Like you have no idea how many nice things I did for him when I can only think of a few things he did for me. We sat on the couch for our 1 year and he always wanted alone time since he was introverted. When we broke up I asked if he wanted to be friends and he said "I don't know we'll see what happens". After the break up we kept it on the down low and we were considerate of each other. That went down south. It's been over a month and we're so weird. He avoids me and when he has to be by me he doesn't talk and somewhat acts like a jerk to me. He's nice to everyone so they all think he's a great guy when really he's being douche. No one sees the side that I see. A week after we broke up he thought I was flirting with guys and he told his sister he was upset by that because he then thought I didn't like him while we dated. I didn't think I was flirting and he liked someone right after we broke up! He even flirted with her in front of me and likes all of her stuff on facebook. He's a totally different guy. He's trying to be outgoing and gain all these friends and he acts like he's the coolest thing. Idk if he's doing this on purpose or if he's trying to be like me since I'm the outgoing one. He was supposed to go away all summer (part of the break up I think) and now he's not. So he doesn't have his crazy busy life anymore or me so I think he's trying to forget me? He seemed to be over me right after the break up so he can't be doing this because he's hurt by the break up. Idk if I made him mad in anyway but I don't care if I did. I just hate what we became when we used to be best friends dating. I hate how he's just gonna be a memory. He blocked me from his friend list and removed all photos of us. He used to be crazy about me and didn't want to lose me. Is he mad he knows I'm fine without him and I'm having fun with all my friends? Is he avoiding me thinking I still like him? He was a great guy and has good morals, but was a sucky bf..and now he's a douche. It's hard to act like nothing happened when we were so close and involved. It's weird being an ex since it's my first time. Advice?
chuzzbug Posted June 11, 2013 Posted June 11, 2013 At this age, people can be easily influenced by external forces. Friends, society and his developing sense of himself and the world will toss him emotionally like a small boat in rough seas. It's hard to deal with. But not unexpected. There may be no single and identifiable reason for his behaviour. Call it tumult. It will lessen as he matures (that's the hope). Each age in life is marred by issues. In our teens we're mercurial, in our 20s we're idealistic, in our 30s we might be complacent and find ourselves bitter in our 40s. Everyone has an issue. Pick people with issues that you can deal with. Not ones that amplify your own worries. You're very young. There will be numerous opportunities at relationships. My advice is to grieve, move on and put your efforts in people who haven't yet demonstrated the ability to ignore your needs.
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