goneundone Posted June 10, 2013 Posted June 10, 2013 Yes, I did. He was without a vehicle that evening, so I offered to pick him up from work.. but then we came to my house. I tried not to, and I even said the whole "it will be more meaningful if we get to know each other more." He agreed, and said he respected that, then we just tried to cuddle and watch a movie because it was late. Then the cycle of make-out sesh, hot and heavy, then I would say no, back and forth until one thing lead to another and... after hours of making out, I said okay and ten minutes later we were done. and yes it was good. So other than hearing its a slutty thing to do as a woman (because God knows men can do whatever they want, whenever they want). And other than hearing what I should or shouldn't have done. I want to know how many successful relationships come from giving in to the urges so quickly? He is 29 and I am 32. I am successful and independent. He said he really likes me and he was very charming, and has hinted towards wanting a serious relationship with me in the future..etc. but it was only the second date so how can we know? And damn, I need some sex! So did I kill it or can it still flourish into a successful relationship?
Casablanca Posted June 10, 2013 Posted June 10, 2013 Sex on a second date won't make it not work if it was going to work before...it might make it a little harder to determine for you (and for him) to determine how much they like the other, but won't change it if it would have worked
youngnlove89 Posted June 10, 2013 Posted June 10, 2013 You are okay silly. I slept with a guy on the first date, we talked for a month before meeting up though and we are still together 2 years later! 1
Author goneundone Posted June 10, 2013 Author Posted June 10, 2013 maybe I should of posted this on the Love and Marraige thread and not the dating thread!! lf you're all dating then obviously you're not in a successful relationship. duh. oh well maybe just talking about it will help someone in making decisions while dating.
Author goneundone Posted June 10, 2013 Author Posted June 10, 2013 maybe I should of posted this on the Love and Marraige thread and not the dating thread!! lf you're all dating then obviously you're not in a successful relationship. duh. okay I was wrong. thank you youngnlove89!
Pompeii Posted June 10, 2013 Posted June 10, 2013 I don't understand why women believe that if they have sex before or on the third date, the relationship is in the trash can. It really depends on the circumstances and the people involved. I know a few couples who had sex on the first date and they're going strong years later. To be honest, I thought that older women didn't really care about putting a time limit on when to have sex. I would have thought that older women are more secure in themselves than to be thought of as "sluts" for having sex. At the age of 32, I would have thought you would have overcame this by now. By the way, there are many women who are "successful and independent" and still participate in "slutty" behavior. For you to mention that is quite irrelevant.
MidwestUSA Posted June 10, 2013 Posted June 10, 2013 We had sex in the back of my vehicle on date number two. We both "knew", and are married now!
TaraMaiden Posted June 10, 2013 Posted June 10, 2013 We had sex two days after meeting.... still together almost 10 years later....
drr6 Posted June 10, 2013 Posted June 10, 2013 Personally I never could relate to why this is a big deal to people. Some relationships start slow for whatever reasons, and take some time to reach a comfort level for sex. Ok, fine. Other relationships are obviously hot and heavy from the get go. Why would I disrespect you for doing something I do with you? Why would I respect you more for acting inauthentic and holding out just because of social hang-ups? In fact, it is a big TURN-OFF when: 1. We are both obviously attracted to each other, 2. You bang other people quickly for flings, 3. But you are going to take things slow here because that's how you think you reel in a relationship. I mean, yeah personal freedom, whatever. But to me the above situation just smacks of hang-ups, inauthenticity and manipulation. And makes me want to bail right then and there. (I do get the point about getting overly emotionally attached with sex as a possibly valid reason. But most of the time it is some hang-up about propriety. And if you are willing to bang others on ONS, but then turn into a faux blushing bride, that kind of hypocrisy and manipulation sets off red flags for me.) I'd much prefer owning up to your true self. I personally have had great relationships after sex on the first date as well sex after 6 moths.
SJC2008 Posted June 11, 2013 Posted June 11, 2013 I like to make out but certainly not for "hours" so from my perspective he kept putting in the work until he got what he wanted. To me no means no unless it's a blatanlty obvious saving face no like with the last girl I dated when we had sex. So unless he's the type that likes to make out for hours on end I'd be concerned.
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