irishgirl23 Posted June 10, 2013 Posted June 10, 2013 I met this guy and we went on 2 dates within a few days of each other and had a great time together. He then went on holiday for 2 weeks and we didnt really talk much while he was gone. We met up again a week after he was back and seemed to have a good time aswel. Then i went away for a 5 day holiday with the girls. Same thing happened again we only talked once at 4am in the morning after we both had been out. he texted me saying did i miss him, that he was thinking of me. I was slow writing back as i was with my friends and i got another message saying maybe your too good for me and maybe we should separate. i wrote back saying it thats what he wanted then ok. To which he replied of course he wanted to see me and i said i liked him too. That was last Sunday. Then this a week later he txt me again saying why did i never talk to him to which i replied u never talk to me either which he then started to argue with me. i just told him i wasnt gonna argue u with a guy ive only been out with 3 times and barely knew which is where he got really upset. I think this is where he got the most angry with me as he said... i dont know u never been with u before think u u re taling with the wrong guy sorry I thought you were someone else How do i fix this i really liked him
KatZee Posted June 10, 2013 Posted June 10, 2013 Right off the bat there is drama and he's acting clingy/needy/possessive and controlling. Seems like he needs to know what you're doing and you need to be in contact or else he gets insanely insecure. Then he's going to be a child and act like he doesn't know you? Good lord, move on. 3
dreamingoftigers Posted June 10, 2013 Posted June 10, 2013 This guy is nutso. Pulling this kind of garbage 3 dates in! (not that it's ever OKAY, but just imagine that crapola stacked up by one year!) Even most abusers like to wait at least 6 or so months when they figure you're invested. Honey, RUN! 2
dreamingoftigers Posted June 10, 2013 Posted June 10, 2013 How do i fix this i really liked him Honey if you like THIS BEHAVIOUR then that means you like him. If you don't like the way you are being treated, then you don't like him be suss this IS HIM. This is WHO HE IS. And frankly, that's not very likable. As for the quote above, that's probably why he wanted to date you in the first place: he could treat you however he felt and you would be sad and try to "fix it." He broke it, and it wasn't even a relationship yet. There's nothing to fix. 1
sillyanswer Posted June 10, 2013 Posted June 10, 2013 Too much drama for me. Dating with the right partner is fun and easy (apart from a few butterflies which make it seem hard) and this doesn't sound fun or easy. I'd walk (and quickly) because it's only been a few dates and I wouldn't have much emotional investment yet, but if you like this level of drama then good luck with it. Also, about fixing things... I'll say two different things: firstly, you shouldn't try to fix people, and I think this is a people thing (well, him, specifically). secondly, any other kind of fixing (like resolving a misunderstanding, setting boundaries etc) needs communication, and better communication than just texting. Phone calls, or face-to-face. 1
Sunshine87 Posted June 10, 2013 Posted June 10, 2013 Lol Awwww guys. I'm not sure she should give up entirely. He sounds like a very emotional guy. Does that make him bad? He sounds kind of cute ( Pls don't shoot me lol).
KatZee Posted June 10, 2013 Posted June 10, 2013 Lol Awwww guys. I'm not sure she should give up entirely. He sounds like a very emotional guy. Does that make him bad? He sounds kind of cute ( Pls don't shoot me lol). Emotional guys who act like this aren't cute. And the longer you stay, the worse they become. This is usually how abuse starts as well. Please use your brain cells. 4
QforLove Posted June 10, 2013 Posted June 10, 2013 Yep. Run. He may come around after time, but he sounds like he needs a TON of work and is he really worth investing that much into after a handful of dates? Eeeek. 1
AverageCat Posted June 10, 2013 Posted June 10, 2013 If you really liked him you should have been more sensitive. He obviously was being needy of you when he was txting you and you obviously told him to his face that you don't give a ****... Idk where's the point where you like him shown. PS: Obviously his social intelligence and methods of communication are a bit bad, but ahem I don't judge people based on solely 1 side of their character. EDIT: PS2: I completely disagree with anyone who says the guy has issues. You will always have to compromise with something. He has a needy personality. No need to judge it, rather just see if you can cope with it and/or if you can still find him attractive.
Treasa Posted June 10, 2013 Posted June 10, 2013 Whoa. I'm not one to throw this out lightly, but.....psychooooo!! Why do you like this guy so much? There shouldn't be this much drama this soon. Plus he THEN pretended to not know you?? Yeah. Run. 1
spiderowl Posted June 10, 2013 Posted June 10, 2013 He sounds clingy, petulant and childish. He kicks out when you don't say the right things to him. I wouldn't be texting him any more. What did you like about him? 1
sweetheart5381 Posted June 11, 2013 Posted June 11, 2013 Ya, I have to admit this one sounds eerily like my horrendously abusive ex. It started out small, he would do stuff like this, be angry and childish but it continued and escalated. As soon as I would cave and forgive him it got worse... in a vicious pattern. It started out great, he seemed to fall in love with me really fast and wanted to know what I was doing all the time. I was flattered by the apparent attention and that was my worst mistake. Within a few weeks he would get angry with me if I was 15 min late getting home and didn't answer my cell when I was driving. He slowly took over my life and I became his servant/punching bag. He attempted my life eventually. I would get the hell out of this now. A 2 yr relationship cost me 5 yrs of therapy. Quite a high cost and not worth it.
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