HuffmanMontana Posted June 10, 2013 Posted June 10, 2013 My ex and I stopped seeing each other about 5 months ago. She had a new BF pretty much immediately. She's actually had a few in the last 5 months. The entire time we've been broken up she's always maintained some sort of contact. She usually contacts me every 7-10 days. She checks up on how I'm doing and sends me pictures of her and her daughter. About 2.5 months ago while she was in between seeing someone we ended up at the same bar and she stayed the night with me at my place. Other than this night, I've never shown any interest in her throughout the breakup. Sometimes I replied to her texts and sometimes I didn't. When I did I kept it very short. Her daughter and I got close, really close. About 2 weeks ago I decided that I could handle being friends with the mother. She had expressed a want for me to see the daughter. Plans got derailed last week and after trying to reschedule this weekend I got a lengthy text explaining that it wasn't a good idea and she didn't know how the daughter would react. That's understandable. I get that. What I don't get is why we are even talking at this point. It doesn't seem like we're friends. I guess I'm just frustrated because I feel like I'm trying to be a decent person here and it feels like some game or something.
Author HuffmanMontana Posted June 10, 2013 Author Posted June 10, 2013 Sorry- how old is her daughter - ? She will be 5 in a few months.
TaraMaiden Posted June 10, 2013 Posted June 10, 2013 Oh, No. Ok, no dice. Drop this, right away. Leave it be, go complete NC and disappear. This will come to naught. You don't want to be around to get too close to the little one. Not your situation to be in, not your issue to have to eventually pull yourself out of. Go complete and total No Contact. And remember that if she contacts you - and you reply - then YOU are breaking NC - not she. 1
rricardo35 Posted June 10, 2013 Posted June 10, 2013 I'm in a similar situation also. I was dumped from my fiance of 2 yrs, living together and twins the age of 7. I just moved out last Friday and I am on full NC. I told her I couldn't be her friend because I lost all 3. Its really hard right now and all I wonder if she is thinking of me. I have my moments where I try to blocked it out but I just had to move into my own place again so everything I see is a constant reminder. I wish it was just her to block out of my head. Having the children in my thoughts just tears my heart out.
Author HuffmanMontana Posted June 10, 2013 Author Posted June 10, 2013 I don't need NC. I'm pursuing other women and I'm not trying to get back together with my ex. I was just trying to be friends which is what I thought we both were ready for. I guess not. Nonetheless, It's still frustrating.
Author HuffmanMontana Posted June 10, 2013 Author Posted June 10, 2013 i think its annoying and stupid of both of you to keep hanging at each others lips while its over. face the reality and deal with it move on, its over. no need to be freinds or act like it have to be. i think its stupid and irresponsible of her to keep send you pics of her and her kid. you are not her dad and its over between you and her. i dont know why she cant be a smart mom and protect her child the right way. instead of dragging the child into all her relationships and mess. how long did you had a relationship with her? doesnt sound long and so serious . and you cant get so close to no ones daughter just because you was a bf. i think your ex is making a impression of a bad mom. im glad she woke up and canceled the meeting her kid thing. I'm going to disagree with you. If two adults are able to become friends and have a healthy relationship there is nothing wrong with that. There is also nothing wrong with being a good role model to a child regardless of biological ownership... Just because a romantic relationship doesn't work out that doesn't mean you have to act like the other person doesn't exist or has the plague. Not everyone is bitter and has to adhere to no contact for the rest of their life. My ex and I have way too many mutual friends and this town is too small to not be amicable.
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