SimonSerenade Posted June 9, 2013 Posted June 9, 2013 So right now the only reason I have for contacting my ex is about money she owes me, a week before she broke it off with me I gave her money for an iPad for her birthday, I even asked "your not gonna dump me after I've bought you something as expensive as this are you?" Half of me was joking, the other half of me was seriously asking the question. She said she wouldn't then what do you know!? I'm dumped for absolutely no reason a week later, so anyway. We talked about it and she agreed she would give me the money back because it wasn't fair, I'm not bothered usually about gifts ive got people when I'm in a relationship it's just this time, it's literally a week after I bought it her!, a good part of me might of let her keep it had she been nice and respectful to me about all of this but she's been a horrible self righteous ignorant brat, I didn't do anything wrong so i didn't deserve to be treated me like that and she certainly doesn't deserve any presents. Right now I want nothing to do with her, unfortunately i still love her but a few nights a go I was desperate for someone to talk to because i was feeling at my wits end, i honestly thought i would kill myself that night, when we were together we were like soul mates, she was my best friend so I didn't know where else to turn and she was incredibly rude, nasty, selfish and well a bitch for no reason, so now I know for sure I want nothing to do with her, she ain't worth ****, no matter what she says or does in the future, there's no forgiving her for that and there's no trusting her after that. So anyway I've tried ringing her about it and she hasn't answered, I've texted her and haven't got a reply, she has the money to give me so that's not a problem, she's just drawing this out for as long as she can I feel, she was supposed to give it me on Friday, she was a no show, I'm starting to think I'll never see that money again, should I just kiss it goodbye? Or resort to drastic measures, I'm tempted to go in to her work and not leave until she pays up, I don't want to do that and embarrass her but its a lot of money!, hell nothing embarrasses me lol I could stand there all day, I'm the kind of guy who farts in supermarkets and when people look says "what?", I just don't care. Seems like she hates me for no reason anyway, at least that way I can justify the hate, I have nothing to lose but money.
lop98 Posted June 9, 2013 Posted June 9, 2013 I'll be honest... I think turning this about money is so tasteless, ipads don't even cost that much, at least not even a fraction of your mental health, which is where you should be focusing right now, healing and moving on. Besides, when gifts are genuine, it's all about giving... it emanates from you and your feelings towards a person. Was the ipad meant to be some invisible guarantee to prevent breakup and compromise her to stay with you longer?. Granted she could've been a major bitch but giving her something, losing that money, it was your decision. Accept that it's gone and don't take such a low route. We know money is just an excuse and that you're hurt and she's your love but it's the worst kind of excuse... it says more about you than it does about her. Just let it go, it's just money, in your lifetime you'll be able to see bigger amounts go through your hands and disappear on worst investments.
Author SimonSerenade Posted June 9, 2013 Author Posted June 9, 2013 I earn minimum wage and work part time so I ain't that rich and it wasn't about buying extra time with her, I just don't know what kind of horrible person can justify taking my money and leaving me a week later like that, she treated me like I didn't deserve to have it in the first place :\ considering I have a child to support, that could of been money better spent on him, throughout our time together I got her gifts and now it's over I don't think or care about them but when she finishes me a week later you can't help but feel used.
Balzac Posted June 9, 2013 Posted June 9, 2013 I gave her money Operative word "gave". At your hourly pay rate you've already spent too much time focusing on HER. Answer to your Q:: yes, let this go.
Author SimonSerenade Posted June 9, 2013 Author Posted June 9, 2013 ask her nicely for the money and if she doesnt give it or keeps stalling threaten to call the cops, you do have the receipt, dont you ? I wouldnt call it collateral damage as she broke it off, if anything she should be the one suffering, not you. Be a monster if u must because right now your relationship doesnt exist anymore. you wouldnt let anyone get the better off you normally so why spare her Originally I asked for it back nicely and as time has gone on, I'm starting to doubt I'll ever get it back, I just want to move on and forget her completely but by dragging this out she's preventing that entirely. I'm not sure if I have the receipt, I can't remember if I have it or if she has it, I didn't anticipate any of this at the time, i was a clueless idiot lol. You got a good point, since she ended this she's been heartless towards me and it makes no sense as buying that iPad for her was literally the last thing I did for her, I always knew better than to borrow people money lol but yeah I wouldn't let it slide.
Author SimonSerenade Posted June 9, 2013 Author Posted June 9, 2013 I geuss your all right, I'm just struggling to understand how any decent person could do that and put on that kind of act when there was problems in her head and she didn't love me anymore, it's just hard to accept, I've never had a lot of money in my life so ive never cared about it, as long as I could buy the odd video game from time to time I was happy. So I geuss I don't care about the money, I'm just hurt and I'm being a jerk, I actually want her to have it and enjoy it, at least the last thing I did for her can be remembered as a nice thing, I just don't know what I get out of this, feels like nothing but pain and loneliness.
juicygirl Posted June 9, 2013 Posted June 9, 2013 I hate to be mean but GET OVER IT, it was a gift you don't get gifts back. The timeline is not important, o.k the situation isn't nice but would it better if it was 10 weeks before you broke up? NO. Using the child example, seriously is lame because if you really thought you could have spent the money on your kid, you wouldn't have brought it in the first place. If you act like a crazy person and turn up her work, all it will do is make her feel that she made the right choice in dumping you because you're a quack. It will only be embarrassing for you when her manager asks you to leave and if you don't, well I hope you enjoy being escorted out by the police. You're hurt we get it, but let it go, the money is gone and so is the girl. Lesson learnt, next time buy some earrings
Author SimonSerenade Posted June 9, 2013 Author Posted June 9, 2013 It could of been a day or a month, it wouldn't matter, the point I was driving at is that it was wrong, it FELT like she stayed with me for that reason then left me when she got what she wanted, I'm not actually going to go in to her work and do that, I could but I wouldn't, it's just not me to do that, when my first ex bought me a game before we finished, even though she finished me I gave her the game back because I thought it was morally the right thing to do, I think I'm just mad at her because she was worth me doing something that nice for her but she couldn't even give me a better ending than a text message with no explanation for why she was doing this, had she apologised for the bad timing and explained everything to me this wouldn't be an issue right now but I feel used and pathetic that I could let someone play me like that. Like you said, I lost the girl and i lost the money and that's a hard lesson learned, it's not like it's the first time ive been used financially, it's just the first time I've been used in this way, oh well I'm gonna let it go and just call it one of those things and move on, that's worth more than any amount of money.
Darren Steez Posted June 9, 2013 Posted June 9, 2013 Dude it sucks and yes as a matter of principle you should be able to get that money back. If she was true to her word she would have given you the money back as she said she would...but she's not. She dumped you for a reason, and she's not giving you the money for a reason. Yes let it go, as much as it sucks, but I'll hazard a guess that sooner or later she'll be in contact again, for what ever reason because she's just one of those people. You probably put her on a pedestal, somewhere along the line she lost respect for you to her where she can ignore you because you're still blowing up her phone. The minute that stops be it one week or two months, she'll be in contact again, needing that ego massaged, wanting to know why you still dont have her up on that pedestal.. Let her go. She's not worth it. Not even the cost of and ipad. 2
Author SimonSerenade Posted June 9, 2013 Author Posted June 9, 2013 Thanks man, I appreciate your kind words, on principle I thought I should of been entitled to it back, i was so angry about it before but I've come to terms with it now, just needed to be told what I already knew, that money's long gone, getting money out of her is as tight as Daniel Levy's pockets lol to be honest I would of settled for a reason for being finished, it's a hard thing to get passed, knowing your not worth the effort of a real break up, just a simple text that means nothing. After the night I totally lost control and was ready to do something really stupid I kicked her off that pedestal because I couldn't believe how she was talking to me, after that I decided she wasn't worth a single thing, honestly if she ever contacts me again she better have a damn good apology followed with something meaningful to back it up, I've forgiven her for a lot of things, I could even forgive her for using me for an iPad but treating me like I'm beneath her when I really needed her, unforgivable, so yeah like you said it just ain't worth it, simple as that. She supports Liverpool, I hope they get relegated next season, that would make up for all of this lol
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