AverageCat Posted June 9, 2013 Posted June 9, 2013 So I was on a visit south and I met up with a few friends. Hotels were sold out so the only solution was to sleep in the same bed as 2 of my female friends, who my gf doesn't know personally. (just what I have told). Acceptable -/ Not Acceptable? Ideas?
USMCHokie Posted June 9, 2013 Posted June 9, 2013 So I was on a visit south and I met up with a few friends. Hotels were sold out so the only solution was to sleep in the same bed as 2 of my female friends, who my gf doesn't know personally. (just what I have told). Acceptable -/ Not Acceptable? Ideas? Sleep on the floor. 4
miss_jaclynrae Posted June 9, 2013 Posted June 9, 2013 Does she know about the situation at all?The fact that you are even spending the night with them?
Pyro Posted June 9, 2013 Posted June 9, 2013 Ask yourself how you would feel if your GF had guy friends whom you had no idea existed and she shared a bed with them.
Author AverageCat Posted June 9, 2013 Author Posted June 9, 2013 she knows that they exist, she just doesn't know them personally. I refused the offer (although the girls really insisted) and ended up pulling an allnighter at the casino and hung around dead tired til the bus came at 4 the next day. After all said and done, I am kind of proud of my actions, but still there is a part of me that feels like I am just being too nice / whipped.
miss_jaclynrae Posted June 9, 2013 Posted June 9, 2013 she knows that they exist, she just doesn't know them personally. I refused the offer (although the girls really insisted) and ended up pulling an allnighter at the casino and hung around dead tired til the bus came at 4 the next day. After all said and done, I am kind of proud of my actions, but still there is a part of me that feels like I am just being too nice / whipped. Still didn't answer my question, but I'm glad you made that choice. Would not be ok in my bOok if you had.
Star Gazer Posted June 9, 2013 Posted June 9, 2013 Sleep on the floor. Or on the little couch, or whatever. Wouldn't be okay with me, given that your GF knows them personally. Come to think of it, I can't think of a single guy friend I'd share a bed with while in a relationship, other than maaaaaybe my oldest male BFF, Kevin, and even then, only with his wife and my SO's permission.
Author AverageCat Posted June 9, 2013 Author Posted June 9, 2013 Still didn't answer my question, but I'm glad you made that choice. Would not be ok in my bOok if you had. There's a lot of back story, but YES my girl knew that I was going to spend a lot of time with these people in X city (my closest friends in the area). How it ended up being was that me, this other guy and 2 girls had to share a bed. Only option. I was the only one to refuse (one of the girls is in a LOOONG R too) Our relation is strictly platonic. Nothing could or would ever happen from both parts.
USMCHokie Posted June 9, 2013 Posted June 9, 2013 Our relation is strictly platonic. Nothing could or would ever happen from both parts. Perception may not be reality, but perception is real. 3
church9832 Posted June 9, 2013 Posted June 9, 2013 If you told you gf, and she's okay with it it's fine But if it was me I would sleep on the floor
Trimmer Posted June 9, 2013 Posted June 9, 2013 Does she know about the situation at all?The fact that you are even spending the night with them? There's a lot of back story, but YES my girl knew that I was going to spend a lot of time with these people in X city (my closest friends in the area). Kinda seems like this answer still avoids the question of whether your girlfriend was aware that you were overnighting together as a group.... How it ended up being was that me, this other guy and 2 girls had to share a bed. Only option. I was the only one to refuse (one of the girls is in a LOOONG R too) Our relation is strictly platonic. Nothing could or would ever happen from both parts. I think you made a decent choice. I might be OK with a pillow on the floor or the couch - something that demonstrates a decision NOT to spend the night in the same bed. You can say "we're strictly platonic, nothing would ever happen" until you're blue in the face, but actually taking an action unambiguously demonstrated a respect for your current relationship. If anybody accuses you of being over-cautious, just remember that you simply showed where you priorities are. Incidentally, is there any possible way 4 adults would have fit comfortably enough in one bed for anyone to get a decent night of sleep? I would think you might have ended up just as fatigued as you were after wandering the casino all night. 2
USMCHokie Posted June 9, 2013 Posted June 9, 2013 Incidentally, is there any possible way 4 adults would have fit comfortably enough in one bed for anyone to get a decent night of sleep? All positioned in a square, with each person's head in the crotch of the next person...? 3
Eternal Sunshine Posted June 9, 2013 Posted June 9, 2013 I can't really picture myself sleeping in the same bed with someone of the opposite sex without hooking up with them 1
Trimmer Posted June 9, 2013 Posted June 9, 2013 I think you are making excuses to make it happen just like many people that still live with their " ex" or want to cheat with a reason that they think will sound right. Did you read that he spent the night outside of the room, specifically deciding to avoid being in the situation? you have hotels/ motels, and im shore there are 10000 of hotels /motels etc also in the neighborhood that you can try. and you had plenty of time to book early to make shore you had a room. Beside you can also choose to sleep on the couch if you where that decent. Or he could choose not to be in the room at all, which is what he did. Did you read the rest of the thread? 1
Leigh 87 Posted June 9, 2013 Posted June 9, 2013 I did that once. I knew I would never cheat on my ex so I let a guy sleep over in my bed. I had absolutely NO intention of hooking up. He ended up trying to feel my butt all night. It was so uncomfortable. Never again. 1
Forever Learning Posted June 9, 2013 Posted June 9, 2013 (edited) There's always the floor when NOTHING else is available. What's wrong with the floor? Besides that it sucks? You can improvise I'll bet to make it semi-workable. I slept on a pile of clothes once. Wait, I knew a dude who slept on a pile of clothes for along time, because he didn't have a bed. But it's the best bet when the alternative is sleeping in the bed with a chick who is not your girlfriend. Girlfriends/boyfriends see red when they hear 'slept in the bed with her/him, but nothing happened'. Even if nothing happened, these words trigger suspicion. It's the law of the universe. Edited June 9, 2013 by Forever Learning 3
Forever Learning Posted June 9, 2013 Posted June 9, 2013 I did that once. I knew I would never cheat on my ex so I let a guy sleep over in my bed. I had absolutely NO intention of hooking up. He ended up trying to feel my butt all night. It was so uncomfortable. Never again. When I was 17 I slept in a bed with a guy who was 22 and we were super hot for each other (in love actually, and had kissed several times in the past), but I asked him not to touch me because I wasn't ready to go all the way with him. Believe it or not, he didn't touch me, he was such a gentleman. I still can hardly believe it to this day. And in retrospect, I wish we would have got it on instead, would have been more fun 2
Trimmer Posted June 9, 2013 Posted June 9, 2013 its not my job to read all of it, but his job to put what is important in the first post i have more to do with my life. i dont know about you. OK, then where in his first post did you get that he was making excuses to make it happen?
sillyanswer Posted June 9, 2013 Posted June 9, 2013 So I was on a visit south and I met up with a few friends. Hotels were sold out so the only solution was to sleep in the same bed as 2 of my female friends, who my gf doesn't know personally. (just what I have told). Acceptable -/ Not Acceptable? Ideas? Of course that's not the only solution! and, unacceptable. Next time you want a threesome, make sure to invite your gf! 1
StanMusial Posted June 9, 2013 Posted June 9, 2013 The logical solution here is to kick the girls out and make them wander through the casinos whilst you peacefully and comfortably slumber through the night. 1
Els Posted June 9, 2013 Posted June 9, 2013 You're not being 'too nice'. Frankly, not sharing a bed with the opposite sex is pretty much baseline decency, IMO. In the future, just book your accommodation earlier to avoid such situations. 1
Author AverageCat Posted June 9, 2013 Author Posted June 9, 2013 Girlfriends/boyfriends see red when they hear 'slept in the bed with her/him, but nothing happened'. Even if nothing happened, these words trigger suspicion. It's the law of the universe. Thanks, yes. The main reason I didn't stay was that it would have made my gf feel really bad after (I'm sure), or I would have to lie to her, both options that I didn't like. Although in retrospect I think that the reason I was debating was that I actually would have enjoyed a strictly platonic slumber party.
ASG Posted June 9, 2013 Posted June 9, 2013 When I was 17 I slept in a bed with a guy who was 22 and we were super hot for each other (in love actually, and had kissed several times in the past), but I asked him not to touch me because I wasn't ready to go all the way with him. Believe it or not, he didn't touch me, he was such a gentleman. I still can hardly believe it to this day. And in retrospect, I wish we would have got it on instead, would have been more fun I've shared bed with plenty of male friends. In a strictly platonic way. I have even shared a bed with an almost complete stranger! (who is now a good friend and will probably share a bed with him again this summer when we go on holiday) It doesn't have to be sexual. It can be strictly platonic!
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