s13pdx Posted June 9, 2013 Posted June 9, 2013 (edited) So i have been dating this girl for over 2 years. We used to work at a restaurant together where I was working while I was in school. About 8 months ago I had a chance to work in a field close to my field of study and huge stepping stone into a successful career. Well after we no longer worked together our time together was cut down dramatically. We wouldn't get to see each other until 11 o'clock at night and then only have a couple hours for us as i wake up very early now. We had completely different schedules and no days off together. After awhile we started fighting with each other a lot more over the stupidest things. She is also one to never back down and will argue for ages unless i stop the fight. Then we would have periods of great time together. Needless to say one night i had been out drinking with friends, as was she at her place. I came home and we got in a huge fight over something ridiculous. I ended up walking out of her place and we didnt talk for 5 days. I was hoping she would make contact with me but made no attempt. I finally showed up to talk it out. We ended up breaking up mutually as we didnt know what else to do. I thought that i wanted this as well. But 2 days went by and it set in and I knew it wasnt what i wanted. She was leaving on a family vacation out of state the next day and i waited for her one night and told her i had made a huge mistake in letting her walk away. She said she needed to think about it while she was away. But while she was there she would ignore my text of telling her i missed her and whatnot. She got back and we met at her place. I cooked her dinner like i always did and we ended up sleeping together. This is when i thought everything was going to be ok for us. Boy have i been wrong. over the next couple weeks she will sometimes respond, and sometimes not. She says she needs time to figure herself out. She wants me to be her friend and support her while she does this. But we agreed to hang lout once a week I have stayed overnight there a couple times in the past months. We still make each other laugh and smile. She falls asleep in my arms and have slept with each other a couple of times. She likes hanging out with me without her being possessive, controlling, jealous, and the other emotional(negative) we sometimes had in our relationship. Its almost like we are starting over. She says she still loves me and I am her best friend. She just needs to find herself. I asked if we are supposed to date other people and she says I can but I can see it in her eye she is not truly comfortable with me developing more than that with someone. Im in a pretty confusing situation. I realized that this is the girl I want to be with but she says she just doesn't know right now. We even had lunch today and just make each other smile. I have a feeling she has a case of the grass is greener syndrome as well. Just dont know what the heck to do.....End of rant...lol Theres alot more just not trying to write a story Any advise would be appreciated Edited June 9, 2013 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
Author s13pdx Posted June 9, 2013 Author Posted June 9, 2013 Its been 2 months and have not gone through with NC as in fear it will work against me. Is 2 months too long to start NC? Is NC right for me?
blotter Posted June 9, 2013 Posted June 9, 2013 NC is if you want to end the relationship, heal, and move on. 1
Author s13pdx Posted June 9, 2013 Author Posted June 9, 2013 NC is if you want to end the relationship, heal, and move on. Yes I agree. But I was also under the impression that it has an effect on making her miss not having me around. Looking for rekindling advise I suppose. Or if someone else has experienced this scenario
Author s13pdx Posted June 9, 2013 Author Posted June 9, 2013 You're in the friendzone. If you fall off the radar and stop talking to her, she might miss you and might contact you, but there is no guarantee that you'll end up with her. I reckon after she's got you back, she'll just continue to friend zone you. NC is not supposed to be used to manipulate an ex. I believe you should tell her you like her, that you want to be her girlfriend, and if she doesn't, that's cool, and then disappear. Use the time away to meet new women and find new possibilities. I have told her how I feel. I have fought my ass off to show her. Maybe too much. I realize im in the friend zone. But when we are together it still feels more than that. Nor does she deny that.
Author s13pdx Posted June 9, 2013 Author Posted June 9, 2013 I am completely aware we are not in a relationship and broken up. Am merely wondering if there is a chance any good can come from this or chance of reconciliation
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