SpiralOut Posted June 8, 2013 Posted June 8, 2013 I want to say unsolicited advice but LS won't let me put it in the title. Unsolicited advice enrages me, especially if it comes from someone who clearly does not know what he or she is talking about. Most recent example? Yesterday this guy basically sat there in the lunch room asking me questions, picking apart everything I said, turning it all around to make me look like I was whining, then tried to give me advice about what what I "should do in order to feel happy in life." He was being really smug about it, too. WTF?? This is a guy who openly admits to cheating on his girlfriend. Sorry, but I'm pretty sure that happy people don't lie and cheat on the person they supposedly love. Furthermore, I'm pretty sure that happy people actually have some sort of moral standard, rather than just getting defensive and claiming they are doing nothing wrong. And just the other day he laughed at me as if I were stupid and told me the door I was trying to open was locked even though it WASN"T because I had asked someone to unlock it for me. Seriously, I don't know what the hell is wrong with him. Ugh. There are other people who have given me unsolicited advice who pissed me off too and I reacted the same way to them. In this case I just said "okay then" and left the room. I still felt angry for hours afterwards. I didn't calm down until I drew a comic strip about it. It really bothers me that this bothers me. How do I let it roll off my back??
Roweena Posted June 8, 2013 Posted June 8, 2013 It sounds like a case of you not liking to hear advice that you disagree with. It also sounds like you're attracted to this guy.
ThaWholigan Posted June 8, 2013 Posted June 8, 2013 If I were you, I would learn to counter unsolicited advice by not revealing too much of yourself to people who are noticeably inquisitive for what seems like frivolous, superficial or questionable reasons. It could be just very short answers, or diluted versions of the truth. Don't let yourself get dragged into justifying your story - it's what they want. Hopefully that will cut things down .
USMCHokie Posted June 8, 2013 Posted June 8, 2013 LS has an ignore feature. I think real life has one too. Or you could just zone out while he's talking...
MomsSpaghetti Posted June 8, 2013 Posted June 8, 2013 With my feet upon the ground, i lose myself between the sounds and open wide to suck it in. I feel it move across my skin. I'm reaching up and reaching out. I'm reaching for the random or whatever will bewilder me, whatever will bewilder me.
Author SpiralOut Posted June 9, 2013 Author Posted June 9, 2013 It sounds like a case of you not liking to hear advice that you disagree with. Where exactly in my post did I say that I disagree with his advice? If I were you, I would learn to counter unsolicited advice by not revealing too much of yourself to people who are noticeably inquisitive for what seems like frivolous, superficial or questionable reasons. It could be just very short answers, or diluted versions of the truth. Don't let yourself get dragged into justifying your story - it's what they want. Hopefully that will cut things down . Thanks. Yeah normally I can tell if someone is asking questions for the wrong reasons, but this person doesn't usually do that so it caught me by surprise. From now on I won't bother to tell him anything. I already have to deal with this other person who asks me the exact same question over and over and over in the hopes of getting a particular response out of me. She is so transparent that I noticed it right away. I don't tell her a damn thing.
Emilia Posted June 9, 2013 Posted June 9, 2013 Thanks. Yeah normally I can tell if someone is asking questions for the wrong reasons, but this person doesn't usually do that so it caught me by surprise. From now on I won't bother to tell him anything. I already have to deal with this other person who asks me the exact same question over and over and over in the hopes of getting a particular response out of me. She is so transparent that I noticed it right away. I don't tell her a damn thing. I share very little at work exactly for this reason. They are colleagues, not friends, in my experience it is best to keep your distance from those that are not in your trusted circle and have very little interest in your personal well being.
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